A Shock of Lightning
by Tara-AnimeGirl
Summary: IchigoXOC story set long after the Winter War. The peace and quiet and slowly growing security prove to be the perfect ingredients for a little romance. Multiple pairings hinted at. Mature content, no kiddies please. Reviews appreciated.
1. Chapter 1

Hello all! This is my first attempt at a multi-chapter story. :) This chapter mainly tells about my OC - Haya. Ichigo doesn't feature yet, but he will be mentioned soon. The chapters will be updated quickly (in the beginning at least!) So, there's no need to fret if you find yourself craving a little Ichigo time.

What else.... Well, the title is inspired by the song of the same name by Oasis. It's a fantastic album if you're into high energy, slightly chaotic music.

So that's about it I think.... Enjoy!

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**C****hapter 1: Midnight Runs**

And once more I was running. It seemed like it was all I did these days. No, that isn't entirely true for I teach part time at a school, I train like crazy with Tessai and Yoroichi in the afternoons and sometimes I train by myself; I really did have a rather full schedule. So why was I running? Short answer - because I'm an insomniac. Long answer – it's far too long and I don't wanna remember.

And so I run. Roxy panting beside me, slowing down when only when I do. Roxanne - my constant companion, my friend, my confidant. She had found me on my darkest day and has never left my side since. I have no idea where she came from, she just ran up onto my porch in a flurry of yellow fur and sharp puppy teeth. She had loved me for no apparent reason and although I had no love to give, I took her in and went through the motions hoping that one day I will have the strength to… care? Dare I say _love? _No, I merely hoped to be brave enough to feel. Her big brown eyes and happy demeanor dragged me kicking and screaming out of the clutches of despair. What had I been holding onto?

And now we run. We run headlong into the nothingness of tomorrow, feet pounding into the sand, yearning for the impossible – I yearn to forget while Roxy… I don't know what she yearns for.

I breathed in the salty air, felt the soft night breeze in my hair and the sand beneath my feet and strained to listen to the undulations of the waves upon the shore over the pounding of my heart in my ears. I would do anything to drown out the voices. I did not stop. I could not stop. I was running… forever running.

My muscles ached from the work out Yoroichi had put me through earlier, my arms weary from handling the katana, my legs almost numb from the prolonged abuse. But I could not stop. '_You cannot run forever.'_ Whispers a nagging voice in my head.

"Watch me." My voice rasped into the night.

_What are you running from?_

"My foolishness."

_And what are you running to?_

"The abyss. The void. The cocoon where I will hurt no more."

Roxy looked up at me, jowls stretched in a reassuring smile, but the tension in her neck and shoulders told me that she was aware of my turmoil. I tried to peer into her eyes in the darkness, trying to find the words to reassure us both, but in stead I found myself toppling forward, rolling, tumbling, eating sand, finally splashing to a halt in the salty water.

I could not move. My limbs no longer responded to my demands and so there I lay on the shore, waves lapping at me disinterestedly, sand abrading my knees. My lungs burned, my head pounded but the numbness would not come. I rolled onto my back and instantly felt Roxy's tongue on my face. "Yes Roxy, I'm still alive." I murmured.

She settled down into the crook of my arm, resting her head on my chest and we gazed out into the ocean.

"What do I need to fucking do?" I screamed at the stars. "Tell me what I need to do!" Why wouldn't anyone tell me what I needed to do to numb this ache? Would I need to fucking die? Lie here till the tide swallowed me whole?

Roxy whined to let me know that lying around in the water on a deserted beach was a bad idea. "You're right girl, we should head back." Yes, back to the empty house and my vodka. I dragged myself to my feet and we started the trek back. No more running, I knew what I would be returning to and I had no wish to hurry. The empty abode, the cold bed, the echoing voices in my head… they could wait. Yes they would, they were in no hurry to torment me. Why would they be when they had forever?

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So now we're back on the porch, dearest Roxy at my feet and numbing Smirnoff in my hand. _"Is this what you have been reduced to?" G_rumbled the voice, "A_ drunk fitness freak?" _

"For now… yes."

I let the haze settle over me, slowing numbing the pain, taking the edge off the memories. Oh god the memories… why couldn't I forget? God knows there have been a billion things I have forgotten in my life, why was this any different?

"It had to be fucking orange." I said to Roxy and she quirked her eyebrows questioningly. "I know you don't believe me 'cause you haven't seen it, but trust me girl… it's orange. The brightest orange you will ever see, a blatant arrogant challenge to the fucking sun. And it's not just his hair mind you… HE is orange. Prominent and brazen and as imperturbable as the star that we revolve around."

She chuffed as if to say I had to be exaggerating.

"I'm serious Roxy. He really is all that and more. Strong, beautiful, _alive_… but dangerous too and I… I got too close and I burned."

She licked my ankle in empathy.

"Yeah… tough luck I guess." Smirnoff beckoned to me lovingly and I dove into his comforting arms. "I was hella stupid wasn't I?"

Roxy inched closer to me, nuzzling my right leg softly before resting her head on my feet.

"But not everyone got burned." I recalled bitterly. "That was saved for me and me alone. _Inoue…_" That bouncing floozy. She was dead now and I felt for Ishida and the boy she left behind but it did nothing for the feral beast in me that longed to tear into her flesh, rip into her gut and eviscerate her, all the while reveling in her shrieks of agony. The beast wanted to bathe in her blood, _craved _to drink in the sight of her pain. But the bitch was dead, she had died far too quickly and the beast was unsatisfied. I was unsatisfied.

"It was the boobs, Roxy. It's always the boobs."

She snorted, which in my drunken haze I assumed to be in agreement.

It had to be the boobs. What else could it be? God knows I gave him everything. Every last ounce of my soul until I was living on borrowed time… What was it then? Not helpless enough? Not clueless enough? Maybe it was the fact that I _could _cook? If it had been the _lack_ of record breaking sized boobs, could it have been what I _did _have? The long ugly lines of puckered skin that lined my side, not to mention, the two that ran down my face! Reminders of my dark past riddled with disturbing events…_ "But let's not think about that right now." warned Smirnoff. "I am not strong enough to carry you through that tunnel…"_

"Don't I know it?" I smirked mirthlessly. "Don't I know it…?"

Smirnoff helped dull the pain but his powers came with a nasty side-kick… sleep. That dreaded state in which I had even lesser control over my thoughts, the time when I subconsciously put myself through the ritual of self-flagellation and remembered it all; the color of his hair, the warmth of his smile, the tingle of a calloused finger on my cheek. And his eyes, the burning amber eyes that I had once loved but now dreaded more than the fires of hell. Those eyes had once gazed upon me embracing me in their warmth and I had foolishly believed that they would do so forever, but then they had turned cold, disbelieving and hateful. Smirnoff you bastard… who's side are you on?

I tried in my delirium to remember the warmth and bask in them one more time. _'Would you at least let me forget the cold?'_ I begged my sinful vice. _'Please let me forget the cold…' _But it wasn't my choice to make and I remembered, I remembered it all.

"_His eyes… they had pleaded with you as well." _Reminded the voice in my head.

"Yeah… when it was too late."

"_But…"_

"Don't even THINK about going there! I barely have the strength to breathe for myself. There is NOTHING more to give. Nothing…"

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Morning came, as I knew it would, with the surf pounding on the beach and bright sunlight incinerating everything it touched. Or was that merely the hangover? The sea was calm and nothing was burning so I guess it was just my alcohol-sensitized retinas that felt like they were being seared. I stumbled into the kitchen and reached for the lemonade and the pills that Hanatarou had left with me.

After the third refill he had unhappily handed over a large bag of them. "I don't like doing this Haya-san. I feel like I am encouraging your alcoholism." He had muttered softly.

"Do I look like I care for your discouragement Hana?" I had snapped testily. "Besides I am not that far gone. I don't need a drink to function on a daily basis, I just need it to sleep. It's my sedative of choice."

He muttered something that sounded like "imprudent choice", but I had ignored it and walked out of the room.

Hanatarou's kindness soothed and irked me at the same time. It was comforting to know that someone out there remembered me, but God dammit I didn't need pity! Now I was being unfair to my crew (I can't quite bring myself to call us a family, we are far too bizarre for such a domestic term) for I knew they remembered me, and so did my friends.

_"__But does he remember?" whispered the voice._

_"Y'know for a zanpaktou you are really nasty to me." I croaked hoarsely sipping on the lemonade, waiting for the pill to kick in._

_"__I am being reasonable for you while you are unable to do so for yourself." Came the terse answer._

_"Inadzuma… I fucking hate you."_

_"__Yes I can see that. Your anger and hatred has turned my home into an unforgiving desert. Mind toning it down a little bit?" he asked coldly._

_"I am trying Inadzuma… you fucking know I am." _I barely had control in the midst of a battle, maintaining control every single minute was not something I had down quite yet. We were creatures of the night, Inadzuma and I. Springing forth from a storm, drawing our strength from nature's fury, savoring the tingle in the air that indicated the coming of a devastating hurricane. A desert, huh? No wonder he was so snappy.

I sipped on the lemonade and recalled my downward spiral into vodka. It had started with one harmless beer (doesn't it always) and then had grown over time to include 5 more. And then one-day beer just didn't help anymore. I had despairingly looked over the choices in the store, questioning my need for stronger liquor when Smirnoff had beckoned slyly from the corner. In the beginning I had tried to exercise some form of restraint and always made myself a cocktail, a Screwdriver or a White Russian. Then, on a calm spring night, the breeze brought with it a whiff of more than just the surf and I spiraled out of control, running in drunken panic into the out stretched (unadulterated) arms of Smirnoff.

The next morning Yoroichi's voice had called to me from far, far away. "What the fuck happened last night?"

"I… I… I think I'm loosing my mind Yoro." I had croaked hoarsely.

"You're not losing your mind, you're just wasted. Hana! Get your ass over here."

"He was here… I sensed him. I _smelt _him and oh god I could almost taste him…" said a frightened voice that horrifyingly sounded a lot like mine.

"He wasn't here, Haya. You just remembered him is all."

"_And that was the day you decided to make the transition from fitness freak to fitness freak with a drinking problem." Inadzuma remarked dryly, drawing back into the equally unforgiving present. _

"Oh shut up already." I grumbled aloud, gulping down the last of the lemonade. "Why don't you go find a rock to crawl under?"

"Inadzuma pestering you again?" asked Yoroichi from the open porch door.

"Yeah… we were just thinking back to the day I fell in love with Smirnoff." Yoroichi always knew; there was no point in hiding it.

"Of course, how could anyone forget?" She said as she sauntered into the kitchen smiling.

"Well I don't remember much."

"Of course you don't."

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If you've got all the way down here, I'm hoping it's cos you read the story :) Please review.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey all! So Ichigo features a little bit in this chapter :) Enjoy! (Hopefully!)

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**Chapter 2: Repercussions**

"Stupid bastard!" I thought to myself, now I would have to kick him till he bled or understood that he was to stay at least a hundred meters away, which ever came sooner. Knowing Kurosaki it would be the bleeding.

A month before I found Haya on the verge of alcohol poisoning, I had found him in the palm trees that lined the shore. "Enjoying the view Kurosaki?" I had whispered, the surprise almost breaking his tenuous grip on the branch.

"Fuck Yoroichi!" He had exclaimed angrily, but soon looked away. "I'm not spying on her. I'm just…"

"Sure you're not. You're in a fucking tree at the beach that just happens to overlook her porch." I knew the situation was complicated and as much I liked and respected Kurosaki, this time he had really fucked it up.

"I just want to make sure she's alright!" he had hissed.

"If you wanted to know how she was doing all you needed to do was ask Kisuke or myself, I know you stopped by the store this morning." I was angry and hadn't bothered to disguise it.

"Yoroichi…" He had turned to look at the house once more, his eyes softening. "I just needed to see her."

The whole scene was a little pathetic so I decided to cut the guy some slack. "As much as I would like to tell you that she misses you and would love to see you too, I can't. She probably misses you, but I don't think she wants to see you and I know she _shouldn't _see you."

His hands bunched into fists and he inhaled slowly before asking, "How's her training going? Has she achieved her bankai?"

"She released into bankai the second day of her training." I had paused to let that piece of information sink in and smiled when I heard him gasp. "The power of element form zanpaktous are easier to harness when the user is in the state of mind that reflects the element. Hers is lightning, it's no surprise really that the storm raging in her is allowing her to make such rapid progress."

He had said nothing and continued to stare at the two figures on the porch.

"Think of it as the one good thing that came out of all of this." I added, watching him out of the corner of my eye. He nodded stiffly but still said nothing. I had sensed that he did not want to talk and decided to leave him to his thoughts. "Don't go any closer, you know how good she is at sensing reiatsu and although Kisuke's seal is pretty good, I would suggest you not risk it." Before he could object I had added, "Ichigo, give her space. You fucked up and she is not ready to forgive."

And I did kick him until he bled. I kicked him a little longer than was necessary because we both needed a little catharsis. He _deserved_ a lot worse and I needed to know that I had made him bleed for what he had done.

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She was struggling more than usual today and I made a mental note to ask Yoroichi about it. She was working on controlling her rather remarkable reiatsu today and I watched as she took on the combined attacks of Ururu, Jinta and Tessai. Jinta was keeping her busy in hand-to-hand combat while Ururu and Tessai bombarded her with kido. The exercise was meant to help her control her reiatsu as well as hone her unique ability to use her reiatsu to sense her surroundings. Well perhaps her sensing abilities were not so unique, Tousen had used something similar. But she could physically strike with her electric reiatsu and use it in defense and offense. She had explained that it's something that happened quite by accident the first time, and after that it was all about practice. One of Ukitake's zanpaktous was a lightning element but he couldn't do half of what she did with her reiatsu.

But it was all failing her today. She was full of openings and Tessai and Ururu were landing more than a few lucky hits. The right sleeve of her shihakusho had been torn off and her shoulder was a bloody mess. But her left was her stronger side and she was still able to hold Jinta off. The last time this had happened was when Kurosaki had gotten too close and she had sensed him, what had the idiot done now?

"Hai hai Haya-san. I think that's enough for today." I yelled over the noise of battle, raising a hand to Tessai and Ururu.

"What? But we've barely begun Kisuke! I know I'm a little off today but I can go a little longer." She hissed through clenched teeth as she blocked another overhead attack from Jinta, but I could see the left hand holding her zanpaktou begin to tremble slightly under the stress.

"Of course you can Haya-san. But then you would begin to spark and lose control and I have no interest in killing you."

She turned to glare at me.

"Not today anyway." I said, patting Jinta's shoulder.

She was still glowering at me but the anger was not directed at me. She looked down at her treacherous right arm and hissed in disgust.

"Ururu-san, help Haya-san with her injuries. Let's go upstairs Haya-san. Once you've been treated and feel a little better maybe we can talk?"

She nodded slowly and left with Ururu. No fuss, no arguments. What on earth was wrong and where the hell was Yoroichi when I needed her?

An hour later, we were seated across a table sipping on tea. At least I was, she was merely staring into hers like she hoped a genie would appear. This was not the time for tea, I realized. This called for sake.

A little (two hours and 4 bottles of sake) later we were telling lewd jokes and rolling on the cushions like two contented drunks. "Y'know when everyone was telling me what a pervert y'are I never really believed it." She slurred, her hands reaching for her cup of sake but missing by a couple of inches.

"Really Haya-san? You really are a good friend. I don't know where these rumors begin…"

"It began when Ichigo called ya a pervert."

I wasn't sure how to respond and so I didn't.

"Y'know Kisuke I think I've gone about this all wrong." She mumbled, gazing at the ceiling.

"Oh?" Maybe I wouldn't need Yoroichi after all.

"Yeah. See I figured if I kept saying that I didn't think about him one day I really wouldn't think about him. And then Rangiku told me that I needed to _accept_ what I felt and some shit like that. Y'know I keep telling that girl she shouldn't believe everything she reads in Cosmo but I swear she's as dense as they come. Ya'd think Nanao would know better but even she can be such a girl sometimes. Y'know she actually suggested I do my nails and change the color of my hair? Cosmo says that doing stuff like that is supposed to make ya feel better. Maybe I should burn Cosmo to the ground, waddya think Kisuke… will ya help me burn Cosmo to the ground?"

"Sure thing Haya-san, we will draw up the plans tomorrow. But you were saying something about doing something the wrong way…" I prompted.

"Oh yeah… I am going about this wrong. I need to GET it out of my system. I need to tell someone other 'n Roxy what I think and get it over with. And Kisuke… yer gonna be that unfortunate someone."

I blanched. Now it's not that I don't know how to be a comforting agony aunt, it's just that I don't like to. The weeping and the tears and the snot, it was a little too much for my delicate sensibilities.

She took a deep breath and I waited. "I _miss_ him Kisuke. There I've said it!" she exclaimed throwing her hands into the air. "I MISS HIM! He let me down in the worst fucking way possible. Picked a floozy with boobs the size of watermelons over me and I am still stupidly sitting here pining for him!"

"It can't be all that bad…" I offered half-heartedly.

"Kisuke!" Yelled Yoroichi from the doorway. "Get out."

Thank you God!

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"What do you miss?" I asked, downing a cup of sake.

"I miss how he smelled. Oh Yoro you have no idea how good that man smells."

"And?"

"And I miss watching him eat. Apart from when he sleeps it's the only time he doesn't scowl. I miss the scowl, y'know that furrow between his eyes? It's as soft as a baby's bum!" She said giggling. How much sake did Kisuke give her exactly?

"Really?"

"Yes! Oh and his ass!" She looked at me dreamily, "You have no idea what an absolutely perfect…"

"Actually I do."

"WHAT?" She shrieked.

"Yes in Sereitei when we were saving Rukia I took him to…"

"Oh… right. Considering the circumstances I forgive you Yoro. You're a good friend I know you wouldn't peek at his butt without good reason."

"Of course I wouldn't." It had all happened about a couple of decades before she met the guy, before I even met her! But there was no need to dwell on the past or to tell her how much I agreed with her assessment. "What else?"

"I miss the sex."

I held still, utterly and completely still, cup halfway to my lips. The Shinigami Women's Association had tried to get her to spill the beans for the entire duration of their relationship. It had begun with teasing questions and had moved on to threats and blackmail when she refused to cave. The matter had been temporarily suspended when she threatened not to bake ever again and the sugar-addict president had instantly ruled that the issue never be raised again. But of course it had been, again, to no avail.

"The man is well endowed to say the least, but that's not all. The man is strong Yoro and that's kinda obvious I know, but he's really STRONG! He's insatiable and has a stamina to match!" She exclaimed, widening her eyes and shaking her fists at me to emphasize her point. "This one time we had crazy hot wall-sex 3 times in one night and that's not all we did that night either!"

I was staring open mouthed and in her drunken haze she assumed I didn't believe her so proceeded to explain. "The first time was in the living room, then we started to make our way to bedroom but only got halfway through the corridor _leading_ to the bedroom. After that we did make it to the bed. Once we were done there I crawled out of bed to try and find something to drink and when I got back from the kitchen he was waiting behind the door and ambushed me… oh my god Yoro… I miss the sex."

"I can imagine…" I mumbled, more than a little enviously trying to remember the last time Kisuke and I had a tumble on par with this. Probably a couple of centuries ago…

"And he used to do this thing with his tongue right here," she said pointing to her neck. "The first time he did it I almost came right then."

Kisuke was in for a pleasant surprise tonight…

"Yeah and then when he went down on me…"

"Miss anything other than the sex?" I interrupted.

"Can't really remember right now," she murmured as she stared dreamily at the ceiling, cheeks more than a little flushed.

Suddenly she stopped, her eyes widened in horror, "I need more sake Yoro! Oh Kami! I just opened The Door, didn't I?"

"Ururu!" I yelled over my shoulder and heard the door open almost immediately. "Bring us more sake and tell Tessai we will need a sedative."

"Hai Yoroichi-sama." she said, bowing before leaving.

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	3. Chapter 3

So all the quick posts are for RainDrops :) If you haven't checked out her work you should! You're missing out on some amazing stuff, check her out right now!!! So, I know things are a little confusing, but please be patient. In time, all shall be revealed! :)

For now, here's chapter 3. Enjoy!!

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**Chapter 3: Proposition**

Shunsui was banging on the door. "Shunsui maybe she's still asleep, it's only a little after sunrise after all."

"Haya-chan was always an early riser. I can feel her reiatsu in there, so we might as well wake her up. And won't she be happy to see us!" exclaimed Shunsui, continuing to bang on the door.

"Go away!" Said a groggy voice from inside the house.

Shunsui waggled an eyebrow at me as if to say 'I told you so' and continued to bang on the door.

"For the last time I'm not coming running with you boys, go pick on someone your own age!" Growled the voice.

"Oh? Someone has been bothering our Haya-chan!" Shunsui banged a little louder.

"She's going to fry you to a crisp Shunsui…" but before I could finish the door was yanked open to reveal the Haya we had all sorely missed, albeit slightly annoyed and more than a little hung over.

"Shunsui!" She exclaimed, throwing herself into the arms of my friend before glimpsing me behind him. "Ukitake Taicho!"

"I'm offended Haya-san. You call him by his name and not me?" I chided.

"You're so much respectable than he is, I only see my silly old drinking buddy when I look at him!" She said hugging me next. "It's so good to see you two!"

Shunsui pouted and she grinned at him. "It's good to see you too Haya-chan," I said, looking her over, "but you seem a little…"

"Hung over. You should know, you see it often enough!" She joked inclining her head in Shunsui's direction. "Come on in. I assume you want some coffee Juu-san? Tea for you Shun?" She said, remembering my weakness for the strange beverage Rukia had introduced me to, and Shunsui's love for her unique spiced tea.

She stumbled into the house ahead of us, walking through the living room into the kitchen. Yoroichi had warned us about her drinking but she was looking far worse than I had expected. The house was not a mess though and I was glad to see that a semblance of control was being maintained. She poured out a glass of lemonade and swallowed a pill, for the hangover I presumed. She looked me in the eye and said, "It looks worse than it is, I assure you." I nodded but all three of us were aware that she was convincing no one.

Before I could say anymore a large dog sauntered over to Shunsui and me and stared us straight in the eye, demanding an explanation for the intrusion.

"It's ok Roxy, they're friends. Shun, Juu, this is Roxy." She was pottering around the kitchen now, turning on the kettle, pulling mugs from shelves. The movements familiar, the surroundings… starkly unfamiliar as was the droop in her shoulders and the tired look in her eyes.

"Oh she's beautiful Haya-chan!" exclaimed Shunsui bending over to pat Roxy on the head.

"Yeah that she is." She answered, and I saw a small gleam of gratitude in her eyes as she looked over her shoulder. "She just ran up on the porch a few days after I got here. I have no clue if she belonged to anyone, but she didn't seem to want to leave, so I let her stay. Isn't that right Roxy?" Roxy answered with a little bark and settled down on a rug close to Haya's feet. "It's been a while, hasn't it?" She said softly, looking at me.

"Too long Haya-san, far too long."

The coffee as always was exceptional and if the contented sigh was anything to go by, Shunsui appreciated the tea as well. She prattled on about her life in the living world as she made us breakfast, Haya did so love to cook. Today it was eggs, bacon, and baked potatoes.

"Oh and did you guys see what my motley crew got me for my birthday?" She exclaimed. "They got me a piano! Isn't that just the sweetest thing? Did you guys see it? It's in the living room."

"Maybe you can play something later on." Suggested Shunsui.

"Maybe." She replied, blushing at the request. She laid out three plates on the kitchen table and we settled down to eat. "How's Hisagi doing?" She asked remembering her fellow musician.

"He seems to be managing his captaincy with grace." He was struggling under the workload for the system that Haya had put into place had been dismantled after she left Sereitei. He no longer had time (or the inclination) for the impromptu performances at the drinking parties, but the burdens of others' grief could wait.

"I can't remember the last time I did this." She said picking at her food. Shunsui and I remained silent, urging her to continue. "Y'know! Make breakfast! Most days it's just Roxy and me and we usually just down some cereal before getting on with the day."

"That doesn't sound very healthy." I said once more glancing into her lack luster eyes. "You're looking a little skinny."

"Yeah, well…" she shrugged, and I didn't push. "I miss cooking for the guys, I really do. Isn't quite the same to cook for just myself, y'know?"

"I know Zaraki Taicho, Ikkaku-san, Yumichika-san and Yachiru-san miss you too. Yachiru-san was quite inconsolable, no amount of candy could placate her and none of my cakes or cookies could compare with yours." I said softly.

She sighed. "I miss them too… my motley crew, especially Ikka. Every time I go over to Kisuke's… can't help but remember all the years we spent training together."

"And the pranks." Shunsui pointed out.

"And the pranks! Oh god, remember the time he caught me in that snare and I was hanging upside down from the tree…"

"And then you bound him with kido and used your reiatsu to tickle him until he couldn't breathe!" laughed Shunsui recalling the event.

"Yeah, that was fun. I believe that one was a draw." She laughed, but was that a note of wistfulness I felt?

The memories of better days created an awkward silence that descended on us like a thick, wet blanket, sporadically broken only by the tinkle of silverware.

"Do you ever think you will come home Haya-chan?" asked Shunsui softly.

She looked up to face us, her eyes unguarded, her pain naked and visible. "I'm… I'm not ready Shun." Her voice was barely a whisper.

"Haya-san, you can't hide out here forever." I said reaching out to touch her hand and was grateful when her fingers curled over my own.

"I know Juu. But I cannot do it right now, not just yet. It's all a little too… raw." She mumbled.

"He misses you Haya-chan." Said Shunsui reaching out to touch her shoulder. She looked up startled at Shunsui, her eyes sparking in anger.

"I don't care what he misses," She growled, "he should have thought of that before he chose to trust her instead of me."

"Your family misses you Haya-san, your 'motley crew' is quite despondent without you." I interjected, giving her fingers a reassuring squeeze. "We miss you Haya-chan. No one knows how to make my coffee quite the way you do."

"You only think of your stomachs, insatiable critters!" she exclaimed, a small smile finding its way onto her lips.

"I miss my drinking buddy." Offered Shunsui, "Nanao misses her most trusted friend. The 11th Division misses their 4th seat. Hisagi misses his partner in music, and Rangiku misses… she misses everything."

She didn't respond to Shunsui's words for a while, her eyes downcast. A slow shuddering breath finally escaped her lips, "Oh God Shun, don't do this…"

He reached out and enveloped her in a hug, "We all know you need time Haya-chan, but don't forget that we're around if you need us."

She looked over his shoulder at me and I tried to give her my most reassuring smile. I was afraid that it had come out a grimace, but she nodded slowly and proceeded to extricate herself from Shunsui's embrace.

"I know Shun… I know…" she said slowly, rubbing a hand against her forehead. "I miss you guys too."

"So how is the bankai training going?" I asked, hoping to move on to something less distressing.

"Not too shabby. I can release into bankai but maintaining it and controlling it…" she shook her head, "that's a completely different issue. Some days I can go for a couple of hours, others I'm out in a matter of minutes."

"But you can release into bankai!" exclaimed Shunsui encouragingly, "that's certainly something."

"But not quite enough is it? It's been two years already!"

"It will come with time Haya-san," I said, "and practice. Lots of practice. Besides, it is only captains that are able to release into bankai, your progress is remarkable."

"Hai, I know. I guess I'm just being impatient. Bankai came so quickly and now the fine-tuning is taking forever." She looked at me over her mug of coffee. "You two didn't just come here to chit chat, so you wanna tell me what's really going on?"

Shunsui looked at me and smiled, "Yare, yare… I was hoping to be able to work up to this, but nothing gets past our astute Haya-chan after all."

"Flattery will get you nowhere Shun." She said, playfully smacking the back of his hand. "Spill it, Juu."

I took in a deep breath before beginning. "Soutaicho wanted us to check on your progress and also…"

"Make sure that I wasn't plotting against Sereitei and the Gotei?" her arms were crossed across her chest and she was glaring at me, her voice as hard as steel.

"No…"

"Do I really want to hear this? I can only imagine what would bring two captains here instead of the shinigami that come snooping through my house. THEY WERE IN MY HOUSE JUU! I even sensed their reiatsu in my underwear drawer! So what on earth…"

"Haya-chan we are not accusing you of anything." Shunsui interrupted softly, laying a soothing hand on her own.

"We were sent here to make you an offer." I explained. She looked from Shunsui to me, thoroughly confused.

"An offer?"

"Yes… I know Soutaicho said that you would have to start at the very bottom when you got back, but he's now willing to let you take the fukutaicho exam. The Gotei is in need of good officers and Zaraki and Hisagi have refused to fill in their vacant positions until you return."

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Ok, so I have no clue what goes into a japanese breakfast. :) I'm sorry, but I hope you won't hold that bit against me. Also I gave her zanpaktou a rather unimaginative name for the same reason. But to my untrained ears, it sounds kinda cool so I stuck with it. (Don't hate me pls......!)

And I used the teensy bit of Hisagi playing the guitar in my story. I think he makes a very sexy, mysterious, bad boy guitarist. Don't you? :)

Pls Review!!!

PS. I do not like Inoue Orihime and I will be tearing her apart in this story. Consider yourselves warned.


	4. Chapter 4

So chapter 4.... a little bit of Ichigo-Haya interaction here :) ........ Tell me what you guys think. :)

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**Chapter 4: Karma, What Goes Around **_**Will**_** Come Around…**

I could see the two captains on her porch, Kyouraku bending almost double to hug my petite Haya. _My Haya?_ To me she would always be I suppose. She smiled at something Ukitake said and I felt my heart lurch in my chest. She playfully punched Kyouraku's arm and I felt the familiar coil of envy in the pit of my stomach. She smiled for everyone but me. She had forgiven everyone but me. But I suppose that was really asking for too much, I had done nothing to deserve her forgiveness.

The captains left after the exchange of hugs and waves, and I moved a little closer despite Yoroichi's warning. She was still on the porch, sprawled out in a lounge chair. Her elegant beautiful legs stretched out in front of her, one hand loosely grasping a bottle of beer the other resting on the dog's head, a finger softly stroking it between the eyes. I closed my eyes trying to push away images of the same fingers tracing lazy circles on my chest.

"_It's time you did more than spy on her Ichigo." _Rumbled Zangetsu. I knew he was right but I couldn't move. What was I to say? Sorry I didn't believe you when you told me about Inoue and her erratic behavior? Sorry I didn't stand up for you when she accused you of treason before the Gotei captains? I'm sorry that I hesitated long enough for them to them to put us both in shackles? I'm sorry I didn't protect you from Kurotsuchi?

"What am I to say to her osan?"

Zangetsu had said all he wished to and I received no answer. The dog, Roxy, was aware of my presence. I think she has always known. The day I strayed too close I had seen her lift her nose into the air and after a moment her brown eyes had locked onto mine, questioning my intentions, challenging me to approach her mistress. But before I could move Haya had suddenly bolted out of the chair and rushed indoors. Roxy stood up to consider me for a moment, before following her mistress. And then the next day Yoroichi had kicked the stuffing out of me.

But today, Haya was lost in thought, staring out across the ocean. She looked tired and care worn but she was still the most stunning woman I had ever laid eyes on. Her hair was up in her characteristic messy knot held up with chopsticks, loose tendrils softly curled around her face. Her eyes were closed but I didn't need to see them to remember their dark, bewitching depths. That small, pert nose, the soft luscious lips… she was an exquisite, beguiling, phenomenal force of nature and I ached to touch her again, just once more.

The captains had given her a lot to think about and I was glad that she was giving their proposition some thought. It was true that Zaraki had stubbornly refused to fill the now vacant position of 4th seat, but that had hardly come as a surprise. He had sworn not to do so and everyone including the Soutaicho had not expected any different. Hisagi's stubbornness had apparently shocked few but I had been enraged at the man's audacity.

"What does that little shit think he's doing?" I had screamed in a futile rage striding out of the captain's meeting.

"Haya was one of the most competent and intelligent officers before the unfortunate incident." Byakuya had enlightened me coldly. "She showed a lot of promise and he is merely asking that he not be forced into such an important decision. Their camaraderie is not a secret, it is not as illogical as you make it sound."

"Camaraderie? He's trying to get in her pants!" I had hissed through clenched teeth.

"It is ill-advised to engage in such a relationship with one's fukutaicho. Hisagi maybe be a lot of things, but he is not prone to imprudent decisions as far as his Division is concerned." He droned dispassionately. "It is not he that is thinking with his nether regions at the moment," he murmured as ge turned his cold steel grey eyes towards me, "it is you."

Byakuya was right of course, but I had stalked off, infuriated that everyone was vying for the woman that I clearly still believed belonged to me. I sought out Hitsugaya hoping that he would spar with me. I had fallen from comrade to lower than scum in the eyes of the 11th Division and now had no dependable outlet for my frustration. Zaraki had not come looking for a fight as I had expected and his avoidance had surprised me. Rukia told me that Haya had something to do with it, but no one knew for sure. "But don't go looking for a fight Ichigo, Zaraki WILL kill you." Rukia had warned. Of course he would, whatever Haya had said to him had kept him from challenging me but I doubted that he would show any restraint if I took the fight to him.

Her friends maintained the pretense of civility, (all except the 11th Division and Matsumoto), but none would tell me anything about her. Their loyalty had come as no surprise, but when Ukitake had diplomatically skirted around the issue I had been utterly unnerved. "She swore them to silence." Byakuya informed me. "I am unsure how she contrived to do so, but it would seem to explain their reticence." And now here I am, reduced to hiding in trees and peering through windows.

The soft tone of music brought me out of my memories. She was at the piano and I couldn't help but inch closer, recalling the drunken galas that had erupted around her and her guitar in Sereitei. Hungrily I drank in the sight of her straight back, the slender column of her neck, graceful fingers gliding across the black and white keys. I felt the cold ache tightening in my chest once more as I watched transfixed. The melancholy tune reached out and clouded my senses, drawing me closer, making my skin tingle, my fingers itching to reach out and touch her. The melody was changing slowly, growing in strength and volume and her reiatsu seemed to be responding to the music, slowly cocooning her in a soft glowing shroud. She was indeed considerably stronger since… since she had slammed the hospital door in my face; since she had strong-armed the Soutaicho into letting her leave Sereitei indefinitely; since she had disdainfully glanced at me before turning her back on me.

I was mere feet away from the house, the music strong and powerful and I couldn't help but inch closer, heedlessly giving into my desire to be near her. The thundering music came to an abrupt halt, jarring me out of my trance, and I looked up to find her eyes locked onto mine. I felt an involuntary shudder go up my spine as I saw those beautiful black pools churning in uncontrollable rage, her irises becoming speckled with blue as her reiatsu grew in power.

"How long did you think you could lurk out there like a voyeur Kurosaki?" she screamed, but I barely heard her over the blast of reiatsu that hit me in the chest.

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I was livid. I was furious. I was ENRAGED! _Who the fuck did this man think he was? _"You have no RIGHT to be here Kurosaki!" I screamed as I drew my zanpaktou. He was picking himself up and looked a little stunned. As he should be, I had not given him any indication that I was aware of his presence.

"See something you like?" I taunted, raising my arm and blasting off a shot of kido.

"Haya, matte!" He said rolling away at the last instant.

"What did you think would happen when you came here Kurosaki? Did you honestly think I would run into your arms and everything would be alright?" I fired off a few more shots of kido, knowing that they would never find their mark; Kurosaki was tougher than that after all. But I just wanted to keep him as far away from me as possible while I tried to get a grip on myself. My hands had begun to tremble just a little and I gripped my zanpaktou just a little tighter. _"Inadzuma, I need you!"_

"_I am here kiddo. I am always here." His soft voice replied. _

"_I need everything you've got Inadzuma. I need him to hurt, I want him to bleed. This time he cannot be allowed to forget."_

"_Oh he won't my dear, trust in me. Do you not believe us up to the task?"_

"_I have trained for so long… I feel like I have been moving towards this moment all along. Inadzuma, we fight NOW!"_

"Haya, please hear me out!" He grunted as I charged at him with everything I had. He was forced to draw Zangetsu to block my attacks. I no longer cared to distract him with kido. I was out for blood. His blood.

"Haya don't do this!" He said through gritted teeth as I lunged at him again.

"You will not last very long if you only defend yourself Kurosaki, I will OBLITERATE you!" The untamed beast was awakening and I reveled in its ferocity, its destructive, uncontrolled power.

"Haya, I don't want to fight you!" I was pushing him back and he was clearly surprised by the strength of my attacks. Oh yes baby, I have not been sitting by idly pining for you. Did you really expect to come here and find me wasting away?

"It matters very little what you want Kurosaki. Fight me you will, and this time I WILL cut you."

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Haya's lips drew back in a feral grin and I was reminded once more why she fit in so well at the 11th Division. She was a ferocious warrior and when unleashed, possessed a blood lust that could rival Zaraki's. This was not going to be easy.

"Haya I just came to check…" I was cut off by a foot that connected with my chest, sending me flying backwards into the trees. I felt her hands grabbing the front of my shihakusho and I was yanked up into the air. Before I could react, she punched me in the teeth, sending me plummeting down towards the water. Ah we were above the ocean, I thought as my mouth filled with salty water. I was going to have my ass handed to me unless I took her seriously. I leapt out of the water as she had released into shikai.

"Arc across the sky, Inadzuma!" She cried as she swept her left hand down the length of her glowing zanpaktou. The glowing tip of her katana formed a second hilt and she drew the two short, tri-pronged swords apart with a sharp metallic klink. The blue speckles in her eyes had grown and her reiatsu was swirling around her in a large formidable cloak.

I steadied Zangetsu in my hands, as I planned my attack. She was a long-range fighter, attacking with a combination of kido and bolts of her lightning sharp reiatsu. But that wasn't all she had in her arsenal, her reiatsu packed a mean punch too and could give you a nasty electric burn if you got too close, and guessing from the strength of her attacks earlier, her zanjutsu technique was also stronger.

"If this is the only way to get you to listen to me, then so be it…" I murmured to no one in particular.

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"How long have they been at it?" Kisuke sauntered over to join me on the beach.

"Almost 5 hours now." I answered. Haya was covered in shallow cuts and bruises and was starting to look a little exhausted. She was also favoring her right side more. But Kurosaki hadn't fared much better and was now bleeding from a gash above his eye as well as a long burn across his chest, apart from his own set of cuts and gashes.

"How long has she been in bankai?"

"Over 4 hours."

Kisuke smirked. "It is as I thought, she just needed the right fight. She's a lot like Kurosaki in that respect."

"Don't let her hear you saying that."

He chuckled dryly. "She's managed to land on few on him I see."

"More than a few, and she is faster than before. She has evaded most of his bursts of Getsuga Tenshou. "

"Most?" he asked, "not all?"

"Some she fended off with her reiatsu alone." She was definitely fighting on a whole new level today. As proud as I was to see her vast improvement, the touch of recklessness in her movements was making me worry a little.

"I see." Kisuke had noticed it too. "It's almost like watching…"

"His hollow." I finished the thought. "Yes. Do you think I should call Tessai out here? Zaraki isn't here this time and if she looses control we might need him to seal…"

"Let's give it a little more time Yoroichi. Her demons are definitely out today, but they are not fighting her… they seem to be fighting with her." He turned his unreadable eyes towards me, "She has of course been training for this. Maybe we should have a little faith."

I said nothing but continued to watch the on-going battle. "Yoroichi-san! Kisuke-san!" yelled a voice from behind us.

"Ikkaku!" This was unexpected. "What are you doing here?"

"Nemu informed me as soon as they detected the sudden increase in reiatsu. I knew it was Haya but they wouldn't let me leave until it was confirmed." He looked up, taking in the bloody scene with widened eyes, "Kurosaki! I'm gonna fucking kill…"

"Now, now Ikkaku-kun," tittered Kisuke in his sing-song voice, griping Ikkaku's arm before he could draw his zanpaktou, "this is her battle. We must not interfere."

"Look at her scars Kisuke-san, they've begun to bleed! What if she…" Ikkaku exclaimed.

"She is fine Ikkaku." I interjected. "She's been training for almost 2 years now. And she has managed to keep this up for 5 hours, we need to let her finish it on her own."

Ikkaku was clearly not convinced, but chose not to interfere. He turned to the two warring shinigami, his brow furrowing in anger and concern, his lips moving in what I could only assume was a silent prayer for his fellow 11th Division officer.

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"Imouto…" I urged, my voice barely a whisper. "Don't lose control."

I could still remember it like it happened yesterday, the last time Haya, my surrogate baby sister, had fought this hard and the aftermath. The violent uncontrollable rage that had given her the strength to fight against Taicho for almost an hour, but the effort had almost cost her her life. Her reiatsu had gotten out of control and she had begun to bleed from her mysterious scars. Taicho had been the only one capable of getting through her sparking electric cloak of reiatsu and it had been our voices alone that had brought her back from the nightmare she had been reliving in her mind. Almost losing her once had been enough, but we had been forced to live through it again thanks to Kurosaki's idiocy when Kurotsuchi had conducted his 'interrogation', the sick bastard.

I pushed the memories away and concentrated on watching her fight. As hard as it was to stand back and watch her take on Kurosaki, I knew Yoroichi was right. This was her fight. This was her nemesis. Kurosaki was the embodiment of all her nameless fears and doubts.

"Getsuga Tenshou!" Yelled Kurosaki letting lose another burst of his razor-edged reiatsu. Was the bastard TRYING to kill her?

But she was moving well, a little sluggish from the strain of continued battle, but she was standing her own against a captain and I was proud. "Let him have it, Imouto. Spare him nothing."

I had wished to be the one to cut Kurosaki for the hurt he had caused, but I was happy to let Haya do the honors. "Had it been me, teme…" I cursed under my breath, recalling the promise Haya had wrung from us.

"You're all I have, you insane bastards! And what the fuck will I do when all of you are jailed or killed for attacking another Taicho?" She had screamed at us, one hand entangled in Zaraki Taicho's sleeve, holding on to it as if it were her last and sole lifeline. She had a good point and her increasing distress made it impossible for any of us to deny her, our little imouto.

"No heckling, no taunting or name calling either. He doesn't deserve the attention and I don't want people associating me with him anymore." She had added for good measure, giving Yachiru the evil eye. We were open books to her and she very quickly put an end to any ideas we might have had about inciting Kurosaki into a fight. But she was right she needed to be free of him.

The promise had become harder to keep after she left us. Everything was a constant reminder that she was no longer there while Kurosaki was still waltzing around Sereitei, the bastard. And it had only gotten worse when I saw what she was doing to herself in the living world, the training and the running and the drinking.

"Imouto what the fuck do ya think you're doin'?" I had demanded, when I had found her nursing an epic hangover.

"Aniki don't start… not now. Please." She had said dismissively. The sting of betrayal was still fresh and had not healed at all. Even I could see it, I didn't even need Yumichika to point it out.

"Imouto… why are you staying here all by yourself? Why don't you come back home, we all miss you, y'know?"

"I know Aniki. I know. But I need to work this out on my own, how long am I gonna use you guys like my crutch?" she had explained. But it made no sense to me. Why did she want to live here and 'work out' whatever the fuck it was by herself? What the fuck was I here for anyway? But I could see that she was quite determined to stay and had not pushed. I was well acquainted with her stubborn streak. Yumichika had tried to explain it later but it still made no sense. Hadn't it been _my _shihakusho that had been draped around her bony shoulders the day we found her in Rukongai? Hadn't it been _me _who had fought along side her in the restaurant that same night? Hadn't _I_ been the one to train her all those years later when she joined us in the 11th Division? I was her _aniki_ for fuck's sake!

But she had always insisted on fighting her own battles and was at the moment embroiled in the toughest one yet.

"You're finished Kurosaki!" Haya screamed as she found an opening and streaked towards him in a blur of shunpo. My eyes widened as I realized that it was a trap, he had seen her. "Haya! NO!" I screamed but it was too late.

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I had hoped to end the fight hours ago but she was far stronger than I had anticipated. I was forced to use Getsuga Tenshou a number of times to keep her at bay, but she was relentless and I have to admit, pushed me to my limit. I knew she was coming up from behind me now and I heard her scream, "You're finished Kurosaki!"

I turned intending to finish this once and for all, but all did not go as planned. What should have been a nearly lethal Getsuga Tenshou being blocked by her zanpaktou and reiatsu, turned into a very deadly Getsuga Tenshou that caught her in the left shoulder as she charged towards me. She wavered for a moment, but her momentum continued to carry her towards me and I reacted before I could think it through. I did not wish to defend myself from her anger anymore.

But my hollow had another thing planned. Always doing what he had to do to ensure his survival…. And so there I was, staring into her stunned, pained eyes, as Zangetsu slowly but surely, tore through skin, muscle and bone.

But she was far from done and almost instantly I felt her sword stab my shoulder, sending a searing surge of electricity through me and I jerked away from her. The surge forced my muscles to contract painfully, but through it all I was aware of her body slipping off Zangetsu. As I plummeted towards the water below us, regret and despair overwhelmed me and I wished she had killed me.

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"Haya!" Ikkaku cried, rushing to grab her before she hit the water. Kisuke was off in a flash as well to keep Kurosaki from drowning.

Ikkaku was cradling her and landed softly beside me. "You're gonna be alright Haya, hold on." She was conscious but I could see that she was slipping. The stab had gone through her chest near her left shoulder and had torn through her lung.

"We need to get her to Tessai. C'mon, hurry." I said and we shunpoed towards the store.

"Aniki…" she murmured against his chest. "When did you get here?"

"A little while ago Imouto. You did good. You did real good. You sure showed him, huh?" his voice was soft, but the bunched muscles in his jaw and neck belied his inner turmoil.

"I didn't finish it Aniki… I'm sorry." She was coughing up blood now and I was starting to worry.

"Don't try to talk Haya, you're making it worse." I warned.

"You finished it Imouto. You got him with that last attack, don't you remember?" he said reassuringly. "You finished it."

Ururu was waiting for us at the door. "Yoroichi-sama, Ikkaku-sama. Tessai-sama has everything ready in the back. Please come this way."

Ikkaku refused to leave the room as Tessai went to work on her, starting with the gaping chest wound. "I'm not fucking leaving her, Yoroichi!" he yelled when I tried to coax him out of the room.

An hour later and we all breathed a sigh of relief. She was responding slowly but surely to Tessai's efforts.

Without warning she reached up and grabbed Tessai's wrist. "The scar stays." She rasped hoarsely as she turned to look down at her ruined shoulder, and Tessai paused in surprise. "Tessai-dono, please. Everything but the scar, the scar stays." He nodded in acquiescence.

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:D I swear they hate each other now, but they did love each other oh so much at one point in time. And if you'll just give me the chance to tell you about it I will!! But I need your reviews and encouragement. Although in the encouragement dept. RainDrops is doing just fine. :) Everybody don't forget to check out RainDrops!!! She is SPECTACULARLY talented!!

And I have a poll for my readers!! Do you want to read about Haya and where she comes from in this story, or would you prefer all that in a companion story? The companion story would have everything about her kawaii 'aniki' and how they found each other, also her interesting relationships with other 11th Division members..... pls tell me what you guys would like!!

May i suggest Diamonds and Coal, and Dig by Incubus? Beautiful music.


	5. Chapter 5

So I think it's time for a little background on my OC. That's what this chapter is dedicated to. Background. Features the 11th Division characters. IchiXHaya coming up soon.

Please review! Pretty please!

May I suggest Silver and Gold by U2?

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**Chapter 5: In The Beginning…**

We were out on a regular patrol, strolling through some of the worst parts of Rukongai. I didn't need to be here, but I was bored and so was Yachiru and I hoped to catch a few good fights.

Ikkaku and Yumichika suddenly hurried forward when we felt a surge of reiatsu coming from a back alley. "Ken-chan! There's someone strong out there. Maybe you'll get a good fight today!" Yachiru chirped from my shoulder.

"Maybe." Maybe this stroll had been a good idea after all.

"A killer!" I heard someone whimper from the alley. It was dark and I couldn't see very well, but I recognized Ikkaku, Yumichika and the 3 members of my division. There were two more people in the alley, one was hiding behind Ikkaku and the other's stance told me he was braced for a fight. I smiled in anticipation and approached the group.

"A killer you say?" I heard Ikkaku say sounding rather unconvinced.

"Yeah, she's the one who's been killin' people all over the district. She steals too! Look at her, she's crazy!" Simpered the voice behind Ikkaku.

She? The other one was a girl? "Yachiru, is the girl the one with all the reiatsu?" I asked.

"Hai Ken-chan and it's kinda weird reiatsu too!" She jumped off my shoulder and bounded towards the girl.

"If she's a known killer what the fuck are ya doing in an alley with her?" Asked Ikkaku grabbing the man by his shirt, lifting him off his feet.

I was close enough to see the girl now. She was dressed in a tattered tunic with a scarf draped over her hair like a hood. She was holding a knife in one hand, the blade flat against her forearm. The girl obviously knew a thing or two about defending herself. Her eyes darted from person to person and I could see her body shaking from the adrenaline that was pumping through her veins. Did she really intend to fight 5 shinigami?

"Her Ken-chan, you should fight her!" Squealed Yachiru bounding up to her.

She looked down in annoyed surprise at Yachiru. "It's not safe here kid. You should step back." She said softly.

"I'll be ok, but will you fight Ken-chan?" She gurgled enthusiastically, walking up to the girl.

"I don't want to fight anyone. But if any of you lot try to touch me, you will bleed." She murmured softly, her eyes darting to all the men in the alley.

Ikkaku's eyes widened and I saw Yumichika stiffen at her words. So that's how it was. I tapped one of the unseated shinigami on the shoulder and he moved forward to disarm her. Before he could draw his zanpaktou she was on him, a hand on his wrist keeping his zanpaktou sheathed, a quick knee in the stomach and a final head butt as he was doubling over. His zanpaktou left his hip in a single fluid movement, his grip loosening on it as he tipped backwards. It was fast, efficient and surprised the hell out of me. Then there was a spark and the shinigami was on the ground, hands between his legs. "She… she… zapped me! ARGGHHHH!" He yelped. "I can't feel my balls!"

"You'll live." She looked down in disgust at the fallen shinigami. "I said I don't wish to fight anyone." She threw his zanpaktou aside. "Don't any of you try to touch me."

"Ken-chan! You have to fight her!" Yachiru was bobbing up and down in excitement. "Did you see her electrocute that guy's balls?"

I had to admit she was certainly interesting. Her eyes locked onto mine though I was still in the shadows. "Are you the Ken-chan this little girl keeps talking to?"

I stepped forward. "Zaraki Kenpachi, Captain of the 11th Division. Who the fuck are you?"

"I'm no one and I didn't kill anyone who didn't ask for it." She said jerking her head in the direction of the man whimpering behind Ikkaku. "He tried to get a little too friendly and I threatened to cut him. I didn't. Your friend came to his rescue." Her voice was cold and tired.

"She's a lying whore! She brought me back here and promised to fuck me for a few coins!" Wailed the man, awkwardly pointing an accusing finger at the girl. Ikkaku had not loosened his grip and the man was smart enough not to struggle.

I'm always ready for a fight, but I don't make it a habit to get into fights with young girls and although this one was strong, she didn't even have a katana. It was quite obvious what had gone down here and I was getting tired of the simpering idiot. I punched him to shut him up and he crumpled to the ground unconscious.

"What do you want us to do with the girl Taicho?" Asked Ikkaku, moving closer to the girl. She stepped away from him quickly, and I could see that she was getting ready to attack. Her scuffle with the newbie had loosened her scarf and the sudden movement away from Ikkaku made it slip further. Her hurried steps away also brought her into a little more light. Yumichika gasped, and with good reason too.

Her bare arms were covered in gashes and bruises and the tattered tunic barely covered her. But that's not what had caught Yumichika's eye.

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I knew I was being rude, but I couldn't help myself! I gasped. She was covered in dirt and was obviously injured all over. But that wasn't the half of it! She had the most awful looking scars on her face! One began near her right eyebrow and streaked diagonally across her face, ending near her jaw. The second began under her right eye and ran all the way down to her chin, the angry line broken in two by her lips. She did not look beautiful at the moment, but it was easy to tell that despite the scars the girl had potential. Her eyes were the darkest blue, almost black and showed a few specks of blue, and I got the feeling that they changed with her moods. She carried herself with grace and a pride that one did not associate with the higher numbered districts of Rukongai.

She was readying to attack Ikkaku and almost lunged at him, but paused when she saw him removing his shihakusho.

"You'll have to catch me first to get that far _darling_." She snarled, gripping the knife a little tighter, readying to attack him once more.

"You're not my type." Laughed Ikkaku, handing over his shihakusho. "Cover yourself."

The girl looked a little confused by his reaction and hesitated.

"Take it Scar-chan." Said Yachiru tactlessly. "He's not going to hurt you. But you may still have to fight Ken-chan."

"I said I don't want to fight anyone." She said softly in her quiet husky voice, hesitantly taking the shihakusho from Ikkaku's outstretched hand. "Arigato…"

"Madarame Ikkaku, 3rd seat of the 11th Division." Ikkaku said with a smirk. "This is Ayasegawa Yumichika, 5th seat of the 11th Division and the most beautiful person in Sereitei. And this is Kusajishi Yachiru, our lieutenant." He introduced the one on the ground and the other two as well, but she didn't seem interested in them knowing they would be no trouble should a fight break out.

"So I guess you're not really a kid then huh?" She said looking at Yachiru and Yachiru grinned back, "So are you gonna fight Ken-chan now?"

"No one's gonna fight anyone." Thundered our captain. "You girl. What's yer name?"

She looked up at our captain and I was impressed to see that she did not seem to mind his reiatsu. "Haya… I don't remember my last name."

"All right Haya. You're coming with us."

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"I haven't done anything." I said refusing to move, taking in the odd group standing before me. One was bald, one was covered in feathers and called himself beautiful, the lieutenant was a strange bubbly stunted girl and the captain was a giant. What circus did these people escape from? The one named Ikkaku made a move towards me and I raised my knife once more, readying for the attack.

"Put the knife away, baka!" Growled the giant. "I said no one's gonna fight, didn't I?"

I wasn't sure what these people wanted with me and I didn't see any reason to trust them. The pink haired girl tugged on the shirt I had wrapped around myself, "Come with us, no one will dare try to hurt you while you're with Ken-chan." The girl was the least intimidating of the lot and her smile seemed sincere enough. It was true that the captain was a scary dude and I would probably be able safe around him, but was this going to turn into one of those 'out of the frying pan and into the fire' situations? I tucked the knife into a pocket but made no move to go with them.

"Come on scar-chan!" The girl cried, tugging a little more on the oversized shirt.

"Where are we going?" I asked slowly.

"When was the last time ya ate anything?" Asked Ikkaku, looking me over. This man was obviously a fighter, his bare chest was covered in scars and the casual grasp on his sword told me that he probably felt naked without it. So why wasn't I scared when I felt his eyes giving me the once over?

"I don't remember." I answered, glaring back at him. It was four days ago and I was running on fumes, but I wasn't going to admit that.

"Then come on. We'll get ya somethin'." He said turning away from me. "Waddya think Taicho? Is this one for the Academy then?" I heard him say as he walked over to the giant.

"Hmm… we'll see." Growled the giant, and turned to walk out of the alley.

"See Scar-chan!" Said the innocuous looking lieutenant. "Not gonna fight you!" She took my hand in her own and pulled me along behind the retreating group.

I could feel the gaze of the 'beautiful' one on me. "If you must stare don't fucking peek and glance. I know you're staring at the scars."

The bald one laughed out loud and said, "Don't mind him Haya-san, he's probably just considering what make-up to give ya." He slowed down to match my pace. "How did ya get 'em anyway, and where'd ya learn to fight?"

"I've always had them and I didn't learn to fight anywhere, I just did what I had to to keep creeps off me." I answered.

"Waddya mean you've always had them?" Growled the captain. "Did ya lose your memory or somethin'?"

"No I remember reaching this place, and I remember a few things from when I was alive in the living world. Can't seem to remember what killed me though. When I got here people ran screaming as soon as they saw me but I didn't really know why until I got a chance to see myself."

"She's weird isn't she Ken-chan?" Remarked the lieutenant and he grunted in agreement.

"That is weird…" agreed the bald one. "So you were reborn with the scars?"

"I guess so Madarame-san. I don't know what else to tell you."

"Call me Ikkaku, same for everybody else. We're not big on formalities."

"If you insist, Ikkaku-san."

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We walked into the first restaurant we found. Taicho's reiatsu made a few faint and the ones that could still stand backed away from us. I grinned at a waiter and watched him squirm uncomfortably, "We need food and sake, and don't skimp on the good stuff."

"I need to wash the dirt off my hands." Haya said, looking at me enquiringly.

"Yeah… there should be a washroom somewhere in the back." I nodded in the direction of the kitchens and watched her as she walked away. She sure was an odd one, she didn't talk like the people in this part of Rukongai and her reiatsu… it was the strangest reiatsu I had ever felt.

The waiter showed us to a large table and soon the food arrived. I had just raised the cup of sake to my lips when I heard a commotion coming from the kitchens.

"It's her!" Cried a voice angrily, but it was tinged with fear.

"I'm not here to make trouble, I'm with the big group out there." I heard her say evenly.

"Don't let the bitch get away this time! She's gonna pay for what she did to Maki!" Yelled another voice.

"I don't know who the fuck Maki is, but judging by you lot I can only assume he did something stupid. If he's still alive he should consider himself lucky. Now get out of my way, fools." She responded, her voice even and cold reminding me of Kuchiki.

"Get her!" Yelled another and I heard the crash and clanging of breaking dishes and pots.

I rushed to the kitchen to find her standing on a counter in the middle of the kitchen, her trusty knife in one hand and a large wok in the other. One of the men lunged towards her with a large knife and I saw her flick a pot of stew at him with her foot catching him in the chest. Gauging by his reaction, the stew was hot.

"Haya! Kami you're constantly getting' in trouble!" I yelled punching one of her assailants closest to the door.

"I don't wanna fight anyone. These fools came to me." She answered evenly, before throwing the wok at one of the last two standing men. He caught the wok before it could hit him and he laughed, "Ha, did you really think that would hurt… hnnn!!!!"

I heard the crackle of electricity and saw the man slump to the floor in a daze. "What the fuck did ya do to him?" I yelled kicking the last one unconscious.

"I zapped him. The wok is metallic and it helped." She answered putting the knife away.

"So if I touch you will I get electrocuted?" I asked dusting myself off.

"Only if I wanted to electrocute you, but I would suggest you not try it."

I liked her. She was a good fighter, riots broke out around her and she was quite a hoot. "You should really consider the Academy. After that you can join us in the 11th."

"As your captain said… we'll see."

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Information was hard to come by for someone who looked like me and most of everything I knew came from overhead conversations. This lot seemed willing to talk to me so I decided to question them.

"So this academy you keep talking about… is it the one everyone here is constantly trying to get into?" I asked digging into the food. Warm food, better fill up while I had the chance.

"Yeah the Shinigami Academy." Explained Ikkaku who seemed more interested in the sake than the food. "Haven't you heard of it?"

"Heard some, not a lot of people talk to me." I said between bites. "So does that make you lot Shinigami?"

"Yes, we are Shinigami. And some of the best I might add." Said the feathered one.

I clearly looked unconvinced and I heard the captain chuckle. "Don't judge the 11th on the basis of the one you took out. He's a new recruit who is going to be transferred tomorrow." He bared his teeth at the 3 sitting in the corner and they shrank back in fear. I liked this guy and I laughed.

I felt four sets of eyes turn towards me. "What?" I asked, tilting back the cup of sake. "Look at those three, it's hilarious how scared they are of you. Why did you join the 11th Division anyway?" I asked the three recruits. "You can't fight and you're scared shitless of these four here."

They mumbled incoherently as I waited for an answer. "Answer the girl you spineless wimps!" The captain demanded, thumping a fist on the table.

"We… we… we wanna fight for Zaraki Kenpachi… be the strongest shinigami…" they sputtered, eyes darting between me and their captain.

I turned away in amusement. "Now tell me again why I should join an academy that churns out imbeciles like these?" I asked, looking at Ikkaku and the feathered one.

"Some of them are here just to make things fun scar-chan." Explained Yachiru.

"Fun?"

"Yes! We make them run errands for us." She said digging into a desert. I noticed that she only seemed interested in the sweets.

"You're gonna make yourself sick with all those sweets." I picked up a rice cake. "Here, eat some of this as well."

"I like sweets scar-chan!" explained Yachiru.

"Yes I can see that, but if you get sick tonight you won't be able to eat any tomorrow. So eat a rice cake."

She took the rice cake from me while the three men stared at me agape. "What?" I asked, a little irritably. When the circus freaks stare at you, there is every reason to be offended. I shrugged when I got no answer and reached for some of the meats. "So tell me more about this academy."

"You'll learn to fight." Rumbled the captain from the end of the table.

I looked up and waited for him to continue. "You have strong reiatsu and you could be a real good fighter. You'll even have a real sword, instead of that puny knife you fight with." He added.

"I could have the sword of your recruit who's going to be transferred if I wanted it."

He threw his head back and laughed maniacally. "I like you gaki. Join the academy and when you're stronger you can give me a good fight. I like fights and I think you will be able to give me a good one after some training."

"So I should join the academy for the sake of your amusement?" The academy sounded interesting but that was no reason to let them know just yet.

"No you should join the academy so that you can get out of this horrible, ugly place." Explained the feathered one. "One such as you, with so much potential to be beautiful shouldn't remain here in this filth."

"Potential huh?" I asked grinning. "If I didn't know better I would say you're insulting me."

"I never lie about things regarding beauty." He added quite seriously. What the hell was wrong with this guy?

"I'm sure you don't. I like your hair. You'll have to tell me about how you manage it sometime."

"Of course Haya-san. But we will first have to do something about the scars. Maybe some make…"

"Touch the scars and you will bleed my feathered friend."

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Yumichika was stunned by her response, of course, but the rest of us couldn't hold back our laughter. The captain chuckled while Yachiru exclaimed giddily, "Oh scar-chan, you make Feather-chan sound like a duck!"

I settled for just laughing at the expression on Yumichika's face. Haya, though, did not look in the least bit amused.

"I don't see your captain covered in make up." She pointed out while throwing back another cup of sake. I wondered if she could fight drunk.

The captain let out another guffaw. "Yeah, Yumichika. Do you think I need make up?" he asked grinning. She smirked at the captain and waited for Yumichika to answer. He scoffed at the two of them and muttered under his breath.

"Sorry Yumichika-san. Didn't mean to offend you." She said, leaning forward to address him. "The scars are an easy way to differentiate between trash and people I need to concern myself with. So they stay. Don't you agree Ikkaku-san?"

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" I demanded angrily.

"The ones that make a quip about the shiny head are either truly stupid or capable of giving you a good fight." She inclined her head a little as she looked at me. "Ne?"

Who _was_ this girl? "How long ya been in Rukongai?" I asked, changing the subject.

"Not entirely sure. Couple of years I think." She reached for one of the sweets. "You done with these Yachiru? Can I have one?"

"Hai Scar-chan." She answered sleepily from beside Taicho. She had stuffed herself to the gills with sweets and the rice cake that Haya had convinced her to eat (which was still a mystery) and now was ready to sleep.

"Eat up." Grunted Taicho. "We need to get going. The earlier the better. Will be easier to wake up the dean at the Academy if we get there before midnight."

"We're going there tonight?" she asked Taicho. "Right now?"

"You can't stay out of trouble for more than 10 minutes." He said turning his one eye on her. "What? You wanna stay out here?"

"No, it's just kinda late. And doesn't the entrance exam happen only twice a year? You know the dean personally or something?" she asked, wondering how we were going to get in so late in the evening.

"Something like that." Grinned Taicho.

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'Something like that' was right. We arrived at the gates of the academy and Zaraki banged on the door, until every light in the building came on.

"Somebody better come down here and open this door before I break it." He bellowed.

"Zaraki taicho, you had better have a good reason for waking up everyone so late in the night!" Complained a puny voice from somewhere inside the large building.

"Of course I do! Now open up." He said, banging the door once more and I felt the wall tremble a little under the onslaught. The dude was strong there was no denying that.

"Hai hai. Please don't break the door Zaraki Taicho!" The door opened to reveal an old decrepit man, "We are still rebuilding the part of the stadium you destroyed from the last time you came to pick recruits."

"That was over two years ago!" Grumbled Zaraki.

"Hai and you reduced almost the entire arena to rubble remember?" Said the man, waggling a finger at the giant.

"Whatever. I have a student for you. Came to drop her off." Zaraki said pointing at me.

"But that's against procedure, and we're in the middle of a semester! We can't take in a student so late in the year!" He exclaimed.

"She can't stay in Rukongai and if you don't want me to undo all your rebuilding efforts you'll take her in. She can fight and has quite a strong reiatsu. So stop quibbling and give her a room to sleep in tonight." He demanded.

"A bath would be appreciated." I added.

"Yeah. Give her whatever she wants." Zaraki said with a dismissive wave of his hand.

"But… but…" stuttered the old man.

"But what?" Growled Zaraki bending down to look the old man level in the eyes.

"Nothing!" He cried, backing away. "She will be fine here. You don't have to worry yourself anymore."

"That's better." He muttered straightening to his full height. "Ikkaku, Yumichika. You two stay here and make sure she's taken care of before returning to the division. I'm taking Yachiru home." He turned and left before I could thank him.

The old man was looking at me with obvious displeasure. "This sure is troublesome, isn't it?" He muttered.

"'S there a problem old man?" Ikkaku leaned towards the dean.

"N-No! None at all. This way please…" he said looking at me.

"Haya… I don't remember my last name."

A matronly old woman showed me to a bath and gave me some clothes. She gasped when she saw the scar on my side but I didn't bother to explain them to her. There was nothing to explain, I had no idea how they had gotten there. I considered my current situation and realized that I was probably safer here in the academy than in Rukongai and of course there was the strange group that had brought me here. They seemed nice enough but it would be a while before I could really trust them. Why were they concerning themselves with me anyway? I looked over to my pile of dirty rags and saw the woman moving to pick them up. "Please leave the shihakusho, the rest you can throw away." She nodded and left me to soak in the warm water.

I could have stayed in the water for the rest of the night but I knew Ikkaku and Yumichika were waiting for me. I quickly washed my hair before the woman came back to help me scrub the dirt off my skin. I felt clean and little raw once she was done, but certainly better than I had come in and I thanked her. She seemed a little surprised when I did so and left with a small nod. I guess the 11th Division wasn't known for its politeness….

I folded the shihakusho and went looking for the dean and my two self-appointed guardians.

"Arigato Ikkaku-san." I said handing over the shihakusho.

"Che! It's nothin'." He said looking a little embarrassed at my politeness. "I'll come back and check on ya tomorrow. Decide your classes and how you're gonna catch up with the rest of your classmates."

"Arigato. Both of you. Thank your Taicho for me. I didn't get a chance earlier."

"Hai, Haya-san. Now go get some rest. You will have to start training tomorrow onwards if you don't want to repeat your first year at the academy." Yumichika said, smiling.

"Make sure she's comfortable old man." Ikkaku growled at the dean. 'Was he really the dean?' I wondered. He seemed like such a pushover. "Any complaints and I'm coming after you."

Protective, I thought to myself. Possessive? Odd behavior considering we had just met that evening. Why wasn't I worried?

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Review!!!! Hit that button! U can do it! :) I really need to know how much you guys hate or like this story!!


	6. Chapter 6

May I suggest The Turning by Oasis?

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**Chapter 6: Suffering**

"Ah Kurosaki-kun!" Kisuke chattered, his voice grating on my nerves. "That was quite the show!"

"Haya… is she alright?" I manage to say through clenched teeth. So this was her bankai? The bolts didn't just burn but also affected the muscles? If she'd hit me sooner when she was at her full strength…

"Yes you'd be dead." Kisuke said, reading my thoughts. "Quite an ability isn't it. She can completely subdue or kill her enemy. Painfully, I might add! But of course with someone of your strength she needs to get close enough to be able to land her finishing blow. She has a few more tricks up her sleeve, the bankai release gives her much more control over her lightning bolts and she…"

As much I loved hearing about Haya I hated the sound of his voice more. "I didn't mean…" I gasped, interrupting Kisuke. Every muscle in my body convulsed painfully. '_Was I really going to make it,_' I thought. "...was a feint… wasn't supposed to…"

"Hai, hai Kurosaki-kun. I know." Kisuke said, hefting me onto his shoulder. "But you need a little help now, so I'm taking you to the store.

"No!" I gasped and Kisuke paused.

"You… _want_ to die?" He asked quizzically.

"No… but she wouldn't want me there…" My body ached and the pain was not abating in the least. How long were my muscles going to spasm like this? I was almost tempted to just let Kisuke do as he pleased.

"Hai… that is for certain." He said peering at me. "Maybe we can patch you up enough to get back to Sereitei?" He lowered me onto the sandy beach and pulled out a cellphone. "Ururu-chan? Can you come out here? Yes, Kurosaki-kun needs a little help, you know what he needs."

"Arigato… Urahara-san." I hissed through the pain.

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Back on my porch, in my favorite lounge chair, a bottle of beer dangling in my left hand, my right hand buried in Roxy's fur. She grumbled softly as I scratched all the wrong spots. "Sorry girl, I wasn't paying attention. Tell me where you want me." I scratched the length of her back knowing she would let me know when I hit the spot.

"Not drunk blind I see." Teased Yoroichi stepping onto the porch. I hadn't been drunk in over two weeks now and she knew it. I'd been sober ever since the fight, the 'epic battle' as she liked to call it.

"Nope, don't need to. Tessai has me on some interesting stuff for the pain."

She laughed and settled down in a chair. I was lying and she knew it, Tessai had given me nothing. I just wasn't ready to admit how therapeutic the fight had been.

"A yen for your thoughts." She said.

"The phrase is, 'penny for your thoughts'. You can't just change it to the local currency y'know."

"Whatever. Don't evade the question."

"You didn't ask one."

She muttered under her breath, reaching out to grab a beer from the cooler. "Haya." She said abruptly, waiting for me to face her.

"Yoro." I replied, a little unsure and little scared of the serious look on her face.

"Here's to you."

"For?"

"For kicking ass." She clinked her beer against mine, before taking a sip.

"Mm." I said raising the beer to my lips. "To kicking ass."

"Kurosaki's to be specific." She grinned at me.

"He didn't go Vizard so if anything he went easy on me."

"He may not have intended to hurt you, but he certainly didn't intend to get zapped."

I grunted noncommittally. This was an on-going debate here as well as in Sereitei, and nobody seemed to be willing to listen to reason. There was no winning this one so I let it slide. I sipped my beer in silence and watched the ocean swallow up the last of the day's sunlight, while my thoughts returned to the night of the fight. Through our duel we had mainly yelled taunts and threats at each other, but other things had been said too. By that I mean, _I_ had yelled taunts and threats at him... and said other things too.

"He didn't really come at me until I told him I slept with Hisagi."

"What?" Yoroichi choked. "Why the hell did you do that?"

"He stayed on the defensive and kept trying to talk to me. I didn't wanna hear it so I asked if he had been watching the day Hisagi visited. That caught his attention and then I giggled and said, 'I guess not'. He pretty much saw red from that point on." I tilted the beer to finish it in one draught.

"What did he say?"

"About Hisagi? Nothing." I reached into the cooler for my second and last beer of the evening. "But at various points he said he was sorry." She said nothing so I continued. "Yoro… I'm not entirely sure who I'm angry with anymore."

"What do you mean?" She asked and I could feel her knowing keen gold eyes upon me.

"Well he sure was a prick, there's no doubt about that. But more than him I think I'm mad at myself."

"Haya, what are you blaming yourself for now? You didn't do anything!"

"Exactly Yoro! I did nothing. I knew that bitch was crazy. I knew Kurosaki was a sucker for blondes with killer knockers but I did nothing. I said nothing while he visited her and Ishida here in the living world. I did nothing while she taunted me and I did nothing while she asked me all sorts of strange questions. I knew what a complete airhead she was and that someone had to be pulling her strings. I should have figured it was Kurotsuchi, I mean he's the only one with the technical know-how and of course he had been itching for months to learn about my strange reiatsu…"

"By 'learn' I assume you mean dissect?" She said interrupting me but I ignored her and continued.

"… I knew but chose to sit back, trust Kurosaki and do nothing. I am to blame just as much as he is for this mess."

"Haya you confided in him about a problem you had with a friend of _his_. It was not your place to do more. He should have stuck by you. You did NOT bring this on yourself…"

"I was played for a fool Yoro." I cut in. "And I let it happen. I'm smarter than that and yet… I let it happen."

"Haya…" She sighed, shaking her head like I was crazy.

"I'm scared to go back." I paused, breathing slowly before I put my thoughts into words. Once they were words there was no taking them back. They would be out there in the universe forever, and I hesitated. "I don't trust myself anymore."

I glanced at Yoro to see her studying me closely. "I don't trust my judgment, I don't trust myself to make logical decisions anymore and I find myself questioning everything. If I had been this stupid once, I'm worried that I will do it again."

Yoroichi had been leaning in to catch my words and now flopped back into the cushions of the chair. "Haya… we all make mistakes. It's true that history will remember your mistakes, but your own personal record ought to keep track of your actions after the fact. And in this case, history is going to record Kurosaki's mistake, not yours. You cannot wallow in this forever. You have to get back on the donkey."

"Get 'back in the saddle' you mean."

"Yeah, yeah." She said, waving aside my corrections. "Have you decided when you're going back?" She asked after a brief pause.

"'When' Yoroichi?" I asked with a weary smile. "Not 'if'?"

"You don't belong here, Haya." She said softly, almost wistfully.

"And you do?"

"The way Kisuke and I left... there is no going back for us. But there's hope for you." She said turning her mischievous gold eyes to me. "Besides, we practically eloped. There is no going back for us."

I chuckled. "Ain't that the truth." Kisuke and Yoroichi were pretty high up on the 'bizarre couple' list, but in an eerie way they were perfect for each other. And it was true, they had made a life for themselves in the living world. Yoroichi still made the occasional jaunt to Sereitei, but Kisuke didn't seem to miss it at all. But who could really tell with Kisuke? Maybe he did miss it, but I certainly wouldn't be able to tell you if that was the case.

"You have people waiting for you back there." Yoroichi said softly and I sighed, remembering my motley crew.

"My motley crew..."

"Yes your motley crew." She glanced at me. "Who's gonna carry that damn piano to Sereitei?"

"They should have thought about the logistics when they bought it for me."

She chuckled. "Please tell me when they're coming for you. I'll bring a camera."

"I'll have the popcorn ready."

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Pls tell me what you think!!!!! PLEAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	7. Chapter 7

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**Chapter 7: Progress**

"So how's it going over there?" I asked Ikkaku, as I watched the division members' training.

"Not good Taicho. The other kids are giving her a real hard time, but she isn't complaining." Ikkaku said settling down beside me. "The ones that aren't scared of her are jealous. She's a natural and she's got guts. Doesn't go looking for fights but you know her, the fights just come to her." He shook his head. "She's a bit of a loner, found a new hobby though."

I raised an eyebrow.

"Guitar."

"Huh?"

"It's a musical instrument. She seems to remember some of it from when she was alive and spends all her free time on it." He seemed quite proud of it for some reason.

"She any good?" I asked knowing how much he was itching to tell.

"Hell yeah! She's quite good. She's remembering more from her time in the living world."

"Her last name?"

"Nothing. Still a blank." He paused hesitantly and glanced at me nervously. "I said she could use mine if she wanted."

Now this was interesting. "What did she say?"

"She shrugged. Said as long as I didn't go telling people we were related she didn't care." He still looked a little sheepish and I guessed he was waiting for me to provide an opinion. I don't get to make Ikkaku squirm everyday so I let him stew a while.

"So what? You adopting her as your daughter?" I asked after a long pause.

He choked. "I was thinking more… sister." He rubbed the back of his head and muttered, "Do I look that old?"

"Hmm." She had made quite an impression on all four of us, but none of us would admit that except for Yachiru. She wouldn't stop yammering about 'Scar-chan' and it had made it easier for us to discuss her progress at the Academy.

Haya, the nameless girl from Rukongai – scarred, tough, quiet, kept to herself, and had all the makings of a good fighter. Why wouldn't I like her? Didn't yammer about clothes, or shoes or some such trash and teased Yumichika 'cause he did. Honestly, what wasn't to like? But that wasn't the half of it and everyone in Sereitei had given me the 'look' when they found out about what I'd done. No one _questioned_ it, but they all wondered. Everyone just assumed that it was the scars and the fact that she was from Rukongai. True, she was from Rukongai and she did remind us all a little bit of our life there, but that wasn't it at all. She was weird in a very obvious way, and in that sense, fit right in with us, but she was graceful about it. But the rest of us? We were weird and 'in your face' about it, and I think we all envied her for it. None of us will admit it so, if you know what's good for you, do not quote me on this.

Ikkaku's fidgeting forced me out of my thoughts. What was he here for again? Ah, yes the adoption. Ikkaku and she had gotten quite close and he visited her often and I wasn't all that surprised by his offer to lend her his last name.

"We both come from nowhere so it won't be hard to pass it off as a coincidence." He offered hesitantly. Ah yes, I hadn't told him what I think of it yet. Any longer and he would be sweating a river.

"Yeah, shouldn't be difficult." I looked at him. "That and the obvious lack of any familial resemblance. She's not half as ugly."

Ikkaku grinned happily and relaxed visibly. "She's quite interested in kido." He continued and I scoffed. I have no respect for that pansy-ass shit and I was a little disappointed to hear that she was interested in it. "The results are quite interesting, her reiatsu reacts differently to the spells and she has scared the pants off the kido instructor a few times now. He doesn't like her too much." He grinned, "I think he's a little scared of her."

Now _that's_ more like it.

"Her zanjutsu and hand-to-hand techniques are coming along nicely. She seems to prefer short swords so I'm kinda interested to see what her shikai will be. Needless to say lightning is her element." He paused and I sensed he had some not so good news. "Her reiatsu… it's very strange Taicho."

"Oh?" I asked, trying to keep to from sounding overly concerned.

"Yeah. She can… spark as you saw that evening. But apparently she can move it around to physically 'sense' things. People are starting to talk, and she told me that Nemu has been over to see her once. Kurotsuchi will definitely be interested…" He said looking at me, not bothering to hide his concern anymore.

"Hmm." I guess that means that the dean and I would just have to have a little talk again.

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Haya was where she always was on the weekends - under the maple tree at the top of the tallest hill in the most distant corner of the Academy grounds. I suppressed my reiatsu and shunpoed to the foot the hill. This time, I was definitely going to get her. I paused for a moment before shunpoing to a branch in the tree, right above her.

"Hey." She said without looking up.

"How… OW!" My hand flew to the spot on my forehead that had just burned painfully and fell out of the tree landing with a painful thud. Another new trick. Just fucking great. "Nice trick. Do you do children's parties – FUCK! Haya stop it!"

"I've told you a gazillion times, don't try to sneak up on me. It's never gonna happen." She looked up from her guitar briefly, a small smile on her lips. She'd started doing that lately and it was a welcome change to the cold, emotionless Kuchiki impersonation she'd been sporting when we found her.

"How the fuck do you do that?" I asked sitting down beside her.

"I don't really know. I've always been able to move my reiatsu around and then the other day this boy was annoying me and I slapped him with my reiatsu." She was arranging her fingers on the guitar and gave it a little strum. Her brow furrowed in a scowl and I could only imagine that whatever it was she was trying hadn't quite worked out.

"You slapped him?" I struggled to disguise the pride in my voice. The girl shared my name and she was telekinetically slapping boys, of course I was proud!

"Yeah. He really pissed me off. After that it was just a matter of practice." She strummed again and it sounded a little better. "Burned him too." She grinned at the memory and I tried to look suitably disappointed in her behavior. "Three long lines that kinda looked like ghostly fingers of some strange creature with three digits. It was pretty awesome." She wiggled her fingers eerily for added effect and I tried not to smirk.

"Yeah I beat you're instructors thought it was awesome too."

She chuckled and shrugged. "I got another lecture, but they couldn't really punish me 'cause he started it and did it in front of everyone."

I waited for her to continue. "He said it was obvious I was fucking Zaraki Taicho 'cause there's no way in hell he would just _do_ some scrawny kid a favor."

I choked. I was definitely going to leave this bit out of my report to Taicho or the boy would be dead in a matter of minutes… or hours depending on Taicho's mood.

"So how have you been Ikka? Get into any interesting fights?" She asked, after noting the expression on my face.

"Nah. Taicho beat the shit out two whole squads while trying to practice his kendo." I said glad to be talking about something less disturbing. "That's pretty much been the highlight of the week."

"Two whole squads huh?" She asked, putting aside her guitar and I was a little glad. After all, I only came by every other weekend.

"Yeah. So how's your training going?" I asked lounging back against the tree.

"Pretty good. I released into shikai the other day." She said, stretching out on the grass, hands behind her head.

"Pretty good? That's awesome! Show me!" I gushed like a kid, and found her looking up at me like I was some kind of idiot.

"Why are you acting like you have never ever seen a shikai release?" She grumbled lazily. "It's my day off, I'm not doing anything of the sort today."

"Yeah, whatever. I bet it's nothing special and you're just ashamed of it." I said as nonchalantly as possible.

She smiled and reached out to punch my leg. "What? No telekinetic pun – OW! Haya! Did you just singe my eyebrow? I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!"

"Come to the exam next month. You'll see it then." She added, closing her eyes and basking in the sun.

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	8. Chapter 8

So let's move on in the present shall we? And who wants to see a little more of our hero Ichigo? :)

May I suggest Soldier on by Oasis? I'm very big on oasis, just in case you didn't notice. And maybe.... Black Magic Woman by Santana? Haha!!

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**Chapter 8: Going Back Home**

It was the day of the exam and I wasn't sure how I felt about it. Ikkaku was proud, Yumichika was happy for Haya and Yachiru was excited about the up coming fight. She was oblivious to the fact that this would likely end with Haya leaving the 11th Division.

Ikkaku had told me of her progress but his description didn't quite compare with the real thing. She was ferocious, I had seen the fire in her eyes the moment I saw her in that dirty alley. But today she was not merely ferocious, but _fearless._ Kira was giving her all he had and she was holding her own with relative ease. Why was I surprised? Hadn't she been the one to send Kurosaki back to Sereitei twitching like a muppet? I smirked at the memory of Kurosaki stumbling through the Senkaimon and collapsing in an undignified bloody heap. Hinamori and Kuchiki had found him and took him to the 4th Division where he had lain for 3 days. I can still recall the whoop Yachiru had let loose when she had heard the news and my own feeling of pride. Atta girl.

She had not survived the duel without injuries of her own, and I had allowed her a couple of weeks to recover before deciding it was time to bring her home. Enough was enough. She had hidden out in the living world for 2 years and it was time to come back. I hinted as much to Ikkaku, but the bumbling fool didn't understand and I was forced to take the matter to Matsumoto. She gathered the group (Ikkaku, Yumichika, Yachiru, Nanao and Kyouraku) and arrived without warning at Haya's house, packed her stuff up (including the piano) and brought her home at the end of two days. When I met Haya at the Senkaimon, she had looked a little dazed. "Hey Taicho, long time no see." She had mumbled.

"What the fuck did you do Matsumoto?" I had asked her later.

"Exactly what you told me to Zaraki. You told me to bring her home and I did, didn't I?" She had answered petulantly. "Why are you shouting? You should be thanking me!"

My attention was drawn back to the fight as Kira lunged forward in another attack. Any more contact with his zanpaktou and she was going to have a hard time holding onto it.

'What the fuck does she think she's doing?' I thought as I saw her throw her twin blades up into the air. She stepped out of range of Kira's attack and flipped over his head, grabbed her swords and swiveled around in one fluid movement, letting loose a bolt of lightning towards Kira's turned back. I smirked as Kira barely managed to deflect the scorching bolt and was forced into a defensive stance. She had certainly added to her bag of tricks in her time away. She then attacked with all she had having got him on the back foot. Kido, lightning bolts, a lunge here, a thrust there and Kira was soon backed into a corner.

"Bankai…" He began, when he realized that he could no longer continue in shikai. I grinned knowing that the fight was over as soon as the words left his mouth. The old man was not going to allow any bankai releases in a fukutaicho exam. Ukitake moved swiftly into the arena and laid a hand on Kira's shoulder, while Renji moved in front of Haya signaling the end of the fight.

"That will be enough I think, Kira-fukutaicho." Ukitake said calmly. "This is only a friendly match to demonstrate skill after all."

Kira backed away looking annoyed, but there was nothing to be done about it. He had lost and she had won even if no one was going to say so.

"The captains of the 2nd, 6th and 7th Divisions will deliberate the outcome of this fukutaicho exam." Boomed Yamamoto. "Soi Fon Taicho, Kuchiki Taicho and Komamura Taicho, come with me."

"Wasn't that fun Ken-chan?" Chirped Yachiru. "Now Haya-chan is going to be a fukutaicho!" Her smile faded into a confused frown. "Haya-chan is going to be a fukutaicho…"

And reality bites. "Seems that way squirt." I grunted.

"Will she be fukutaicho with me?" She asked, chewing on her lip nervously.

"Depends on her. There are open positions in the 9th and 12th Divisions. The 3rd and 7th divisions don't have 3rd seats so she can choose from any of those, if the captains are interested. I've told her she can stay if she likes."

"You can't let her leave Ken-chan!" Wailed Yachiru as the gravity of the exam finally hit her. I had been expecting this.

"Stop squealing Yachiru! It ain't up to me, take it up with her." I growled and that shut her up, but I could see her bottom lip quivering and just knew there was going to be tears.

"Feather-chan you can't let her go! I don't want her to go, she just got back!" She wailed throwing herself into Yumichika's waiting hands.

I grunted and decided to leave the 'girls' to cry it out. Time to go find the 'men' in my division.

Ikkaku had found Haya right after the match and was smirking beside her as people came forth to congratulate her and welcome her back. She had only been back a few days and not a lot of people had known.

"Taicho." She called as soon as she saw me walking over, a big grin plastered on her face. "So?"

"So, what?" I asked, playing dumb.

"Oh come off it Taicho!" She said rolling her eyes at me.

Ikkaku was playing the part of the idiot brother and gushed on about her. "And that isn't the half of it Taicho, you should see her bankai…"

"Will ya put a cork in it Ikkaku!" I said cutting him off. "I just left the crying women, don't need ya talking my ears off now."

Haya's smile disappeared into a worried frown. "Yachiru's upset huh?"

"Wadya think?"

"I was wondering when this was going to come. She hadn't realized and I didn't bother to explain before the fight."

"You needed your focus, don't worry about it. Give her some candy, promise you won't stop cooking. That's all she needs." I hoped I sounded convincing, I didn't want her to leave the Division either.

She patted my arm softly. "I won't stop cooking." She said with a playful smile. "Breakfasts will continue as always, you'll just need to take a little walk before you get to eat is all."

I grunted at her small attempt to reassure us, and I was certain little would change. She was a part of us no matter where she went. Ikkaku was indifferent to her transfer, because he _knew_ nothing would change! And she needed to get out from under his shadow, but you couldn't tell him that to his face without him throwing a fit.

She had gone to the Academy with the sole intention of joining us at the 11th, and it wasn't the Division she joined so much as it was the 4 of us. But it was going to be a real bugger trying to explain that to Yachiru.

"Haya-!"

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For the first time in my life I found myself in full agreement with Yachiru and her wail resonated within me. "Don't leave the 11th. Don't go to the…"

"_Yes? Which division was it again?" Cackled the hollow within me. _

"Any other." I stubbornly responded. "None in particular." I tried to block out the echoes of his shrill laughter and turned to watch Haya. She had taunted and goaded me during the fight and even though I knew she had lied about it all, it had done nothing to quench the raging jealousy in my heart.

I wrenched my thoughts away from her and her fictitious lovers and watched as she placated Yachiru. Her arms were laden with candy, and her wailing had reduced to a few broken sobs so I surmised that Yachiru had been sold on the idea as well. Fickle, candy obsessed bitch.

The four at the 11th Division were an odd group but for all intents and purposes were family to Haya, her 'motley crew'. I was no stranger to weird families, but the five before me where even weirder than my own.

"A giant, a bald guy, a metrosexual, a midget and me." She had said. "We're a circus act, that's what we are." She had giggled uncontrollably as she had continued to tell me about the first time she had met them. "Kami, I didn't know how to react! And then Yumichika started off about doing my hair and make-up for my scars! I just sat in that restaurant wondering what the hell I was getting myself into!"

"Ichigo." Said a voice breaking into my thoughts. I turned around to see Rukia looking at me sadly.

"Hey Rukia, how's it going? I haven't seen you in a long time."

"I'm not the only one you haven't seen in a long time." She said pointedly.

"Isn't that always the case? There's always someone you sort of lose touch with." I refused to take the bait. This was not going to turn into a conversation about Haya.

"Ichigo…"

"No Rukia." I cut in. "No. We are not having this conversation." I turned to leave and walked away rapidly. But not rapidly enough for I still caught her last words.

"You need to talk to her…"

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RainDrops.... How's that for suffering? Even his hollow won't leave him be! LOL


	9. Chapter 9

So..................... I think it's time to return to the past again. A little more of my motley crew. But I'm posting the 10th chapter with this for people who dont care for the motley crew. :)

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**Chapter 9: Initiation **

'Oh my god he's going to kill me.' I thought to myself as I watched Zaraki grin like a madman and attack once more. I raised my swords to defend myself but soon felt my footing slip. I was being pushed back again.

"What the fuck do I need to do?" I screamed at Inadzuma, but he was strangely silent. I supposed he was reeling under the strain of trying to withstand Zaraki as well. Was everyone else just going to stand by while this crazy man who arrived here this morning as my benefactor suddenly turned on me and sliced me to itsy bitsy pieces? Then I remembered how scared the dean had been and how insanely strong he was. Who could stop him even if they wanted to?

My knees gave way as he bore down on me and I felt them scrape painfully against the gravel. I cursed under my breath and waited for the finishing blow. But it didn't come and I looked up in surprise to find him grinning at me, canines glistening in the sunlight, single uncovered eye twinkling in glee.

"You're coming with me to the 11th Gaki! You can be the 17th seated officer." He guffawed down at me as I gasped. "You lasted 20 minutes which is more than the current 17th seat ever did, so the position's yours if you want it."

I tried to respond but found that I couldn't. I didn't even have the strength to pull myself to my feet. I felt someone's hands grasp me under my arms and haul me up. I looked up in gratitude into the eyes of my surrogate brother.

"Ari…gato!" I gasped looking at Zaraki and Ikkaku. "Arigato… Zaraki Taicho." I had a whole thank you speech prepared in my head but he just grunted at me and turned to leave.

"You all right?" Ikkaku asked softly. I shook my head. I couldn't feel my legs. "Che. I suppose I'll have to help you then." He mocked and I glared at him still unable to find the strength to speak. "But you're a member of the 11th now so I suppose I am assisting a comrade…"

Yumichika and Yachiru were waving me to and I nodded to them weakly and tried to wave back but the room had begun to spin and I thought I saw orange. Orange hair? It couldn't be I decided as I slumped against Ikkaku.

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"Scar-chan!" Squealed Yachiru bounding into Haya's room at the dorms. It was her last night here and so despite the 'no-boys' rule, we were there. Hanatarou had come by to check on her and had healed her injuries, just a little internal bleeding and a few cracked ribs apart from the gashes and bruises. Considering she had just fought Zaraki, she had got off lightly. Haya was still unconscious, sleeping off the extreme exhaustion and the treatment, and I took the time to look around her room.

For all her brashness and un-lady like ways she still had taste. She had painted the wall behind her bed a pale blue and her desk was immaculate; books stacked into a neat pile, meager wardrobe (few but still beautiful) neat. Her guitar was propped against the wall by her bed and next to it sat a little dog-eared book.

I glanced at her once more to check if she was any closer to consciousness but her deep breaths told me that she was still fast asleep. I smiled slowly recalling her fight with Taicho. Where other students in her class had quailed at the sight of him, she had stepped forward when he had called on her.

"Gaki! I brought you here 6 years ago in the hopes that you would give me a good fight." Taicho had gruffly informed her. "So let's get to it."

He had attacked her without further ado with his distinctive feral grin plastered on his face. Instead of paralyzing her with fear, it had evoked a similar response her. She had bared her teeth in an equally maniacal grin and launched herself with reckless abandon at Taicho.

She was quick but not quick enough, she was strong but nowhere nearly as strong as Taicho, but that had not deterred her and she had fought until she had no strength left. Yes she had _fought_; she had not just defended herself, but had attacked him.

"Scar-chan!" Yachiru cheeped again, poking her in the shoulder.

"It's lights out in there, Yachiru." Ikkaku said grinning. "She ain't gonna wake up any time soon." He looked at me. "She's something ain't she? 20 minutes. I didn't know she had it in her."

I smiled. Neither did I. I had visited sometimes with Ikkaku and I had sensed that she was getting stronger but today had been a display of extraordinary effort. "She will do the 11th Division proud. She will do you proud."

"Che!" Ikkaku said coloring like a turnip, "I don't care about that! Besides we're not related and we're not pretending to be either."

"It's obvious you're not related Ikkaku. If she had been I would ask how it was that she was so beautiful." I teased.

He glared at me and said nothing. "Shall we pack her stuff up? There doesn't seem to be a whole lot." He looked around the room at her meager belongings, his gaze finally coming to rest on the scarf he had bought her for her birthday. I had wondered when he would notice it sitting on her dresser. She had unwrapped it, but it was obvious she had never used it.

"She didn't like it." He said slowly.

"No Ikkaku. I'd say she liked it a little too much."

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"Scar-chan!" Yachiru squealed launching herself at me. She had done this a few times in the past so I was prepared for it and caught her before she took me down with her.

"Hey Yachiru." I gasped swinging my lieutenant onto my back. "What's up?"

She grinned her blinding smile at me and said, "Just came to thank you for giving Ken-chan a good fight. He liked it very much."

"I didn't last very long Yachiru. I doubt he enjoyed it." I said softly. I was a little disappointed in myself despite everyone's assurances that I had done great. Taicho had after all, picked me up in Rukongai and put me in the Academy so that I could learn to fight. I was convinced that I had failed him.

"He did Scar-chan! He did!" Insisted Yachiru.

"How are you so certain?" I asked, uncertainly.

"Because he made you 17th seat. Ken-chan never goes to the final exams to pick recruits. He only goes if he's really angry or really bored and even then he just breaks the stadium." She informed me.

I nodded gratefully. Her words had helped a little bit. "Thanks Yachiru. That helps." She beamed at me gleefully. "Should I call you fukutaicho now?"

"No Scar-chan, Yachiru is fine." She informed me and slid down my back. She sure was a strange one, not to mention the mysterious relationship she had with Taicho.

"Taicho." I said softly testing the word out. He was _my_ Taicho now. It sounded a little strange but seemed fitting for the giant.

"Ready to go Haya?" asked Ikkaku. The move to the 11th Division had certainly made me happy, but for some odd reason Ikkaku was _deliriously_ happy.

"Why are you so excited anyway?" I asked him.

"Che! I'm not excited!" He said scowling at me. "Like I would be happy that you're coming to the 11th. I'm sure you'll be irritating me all the time. Don't expect me to protect you if the guys try to get 'too' friendly. You are going to be the only girl there after all."

"Doesn't Yachiru count?"

"Wadya think?" He asked smirking.

"Don't let him fool you Haya-chan." Yumichika said strolling into my room. "He's so happy that you're coming that it's all he talks about and he's already warned all the guys off."

I quirked an inquiring eyebrow at Ikkaku, "Is that so Ikka? Do you want me to call you Aniki and look all doe-eyed and over awed around you? Oh my big brother Madarame Ikkaku! The 3rd seat of the 11th Division!" I squeaked in a ridiculously high toned, sickly sweet voice.

"CHE!" He spat at us and strode out of the room.

I chuckled and found Yumichika studying me. "You should do that more often Haya-chan. You are very beautiful when you laugh."

"So beautiful that I don't need make up?" I said, teasing him about his obsession with all that is 'beautiful.'

"Yes." He said quite seriously. Well so much for that joke!

"You were very impressive in the exam." He said as I took one final look around the room and walked out, closing the door behind me.

"Arigato Ayasegawa-san."

"Call me Yumichika Haya-chan." He said with a delicate wave of his hand. "All the captains were there. I know all of them were quite impressed. If you hadn't accepted Taicho's offer they would have been all over you!"

"Are you serious?" I asked incredulously. "I lasted 20 minutes!"

"You lasted 20 minutes against the strongest Taicho in the Gotei Haya-chan. That is no small feat." He glanced at me through his feathered lashes. "Kurotsuchi of course has been trying to get his hands on you for a long time."

"Who's Kurotsuchi?"

"Taicho of the 12th Division. The ugly man who wears too much make up." He said scrunching his nose in disgust.

"Yellow teeth, blue… fluff around his head, weird caps on his ears?" I asked, I remembered that I had spoken to his zonked out lieutenant once.

"The same. He's a cruel man Haya-chan. Stay away from him while you're in Sereitei. Taicho threatened the dean at the Academy and forbid anyone from the 12th Division to visit you. He also spoke to the Soutaicho about it. But while you're in Sereitei you will be much closer to him."

"Why's he so interested in me?" I asked bewildered.

"He's not interested in you, just your strange reiatsu. He heads the research and development department of the Gotei." He said, his voice grave and his expression deadly serious. He stopped and turned to look at me. "Haya-chan, I am serious about this. Stay away from that man."

"I hear you Yumichika. Stay away from Kurotsuchi." I said trying to reassure him, but he seemed strangely perturbed.

"He is a wicked man Haya-chan. He will not hesitate to subject you to torture and experiments just to satisfy his curiosity."

I nodded slowly. "I'll stay away from him. But what about his lieutenant, she seems a little vacant?"

"She's anything but vacant. But she will not act without her father's say so, so you should be ok around her, but stay on your guard." He said and we resumed walking towards the 11th Division.

"Father?"

"It's a long twisted story Haya-chan. I'll tell you about it sometime. But for now… welcome to the 11th Division!"

I looked up at the archway that said '11th Division' and the buildings beyond. I was at the 11th Division.

I took a deep breath and stepped in.

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I was excited she was here and then again I wasn't sure this was such a good idea anymore. She was going to be the only girl here and the 11th Division is not known for its gentlemen. Every single woman that had ever tried to work in the 11th had run out the gates screaming in a matter of days if not hours, and I was worried.

Yumichika assured me that it would be all right. Haya was after all a strong fighter and quite capable of taking care of herself. Taicho had put her in a room near Yachiru, which put her a few doors away from the three of us so she ought to be relatively safe. And of course, there was the fact that I, Madarame Ikkaku, 3rd seat of the 11th Division, had vowed to personally turn any man that went near her into a soprano singing fairy. But I was still worried, and her first night in the canteens proved that I had every reason to be.

Haya attracted trouble. She didn't go looking for it, it just came to her like bees to honey. One moment she was trying to leave the room, the next there's a Shinigami yowling in pain by her feet.

"Today your hand," She warned in her cold, impersonal voice, "tomorrow your balls."

"Get the bitch!" Someone yelled and we had an all out brawl.

"Kami Haya! How the hell do you do this?" I yelled, running forward to help. Yumichika and Yachiru joined in the fun, but Taicho sat back and laughed as he watched the fight unfold before him.

"Gaki, you're gonna fit right in!" He proclaimed.

An hour later we were sitting in the 4th Division, getting our cuts and bruises attended to. Unohana Taicho was not amused with the large number of 11th Division members crowding her infirmary again.

"So what was it this time?" She asked testily. "A fight over the last piece of sushi?"

"I apologize Unohana Taicho." Haya said softly, although the question had been directed at me, "This fight was my fault. One guy tried to grope my ass and I burned his hand. As a warning, nothing serious, but then one thing led to another…"

"And your entire division has now decided to move into mine." She finished, but I could see that she was no longer angry and was looking at Haya with interest. "What's your name?"

"Madarame Haya, 17th Seat of the 11th Division. Today was my first day."

"Oh my Ikkaku-san, you didn't tell me you had a sister!" Unohana exclaimed with a smile.

"We're not related." We answered in unison.

Unohana paused to consider our response but didn't question us about it. "So how did you burn that perverted Shinigami again?"

Haya raised her right hand and extended her thumb, index and middle fingers. Blue arcs of crackling electricity arose from her fingertips to unite into an angry ball of agitated energy between her fingers. "I can do anything from a warning zap to a 3rd degree burn." She explained to Unohana.

"I see…" came the 4th Division Taicho's reply but it was quite obvious she didn't. None of us did. "You may want to stay away from the 12th Division Haya-san…"

"So I've been told, Unohana Taicho. Thank you for healing us. I'll try not to add to your duties in the future." Haya said softly with a bow.

Unohana smiled kindly. "Feel free to send me any number of perverts. But try not to send me the entire division in a single night."

Over the next few weeks Haya single-handedly sent at least 3 'perverts' to the 4th Division on a daily basis, the record currently stands at 16 in a single day and soon the division learned that she was not one to be messed with. She was impossible to sneak up on as she sensed reiatsu's very well, she had a temper, and she was not merciful when she finally got her hands on the culprit. The former 17th seat clearly had a bone to pick with her and despite her repeated attempts to get him to back off peacefully, he kept at it and constantly heckled her anytime he saw her. The argument was finally settled when she roped him upside down from the entrance archway of the division and told Yachiru that he was a piñata.

She had stood by as the man yelped in pain and begged to be let down, her lips stretched into an eerie grin that instantly killed any ideas of retribution his friends had.

"You haven't dropped a single piece of candy, piñata-sama." She jeered, a hard glint in her eyes. "Clearly Yachiru-san has not hit you hard enough. Give it another go Yachiru, piñatas that don't part with their candy are clearly meant to be hit a little harder."

"I told you she'd be all right." Yumichika said smugly from beside me as the three of us watched Yachiru torture the man. "She loves to fight and _can_ fight very well, but most of all, look how beautiful she looks when she does it!"

I looked at Haya who was leaning casually against the gate, hands crossed across her chest and smiling up at the offending Shinigami. She was wearing the scarf I had bought her years ago, the ends trailing softly in the breeze…. She turned to look in our direction, almost as if she had felt our gaze on her. Her eyes softened for a moment, and she acknowledged us with an imperceptible nod before returning her attention to the upside down Shinigami.

I decided to stop correcting people when they assumed we were related.

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Review PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!


	10. Chapter 10

Here goes RainDrops!!! :) One of your favorite characters features in this one.... Hmmmm I wonder who that could be?! LOL

Suggested music, now let's see......... The Hardest Button to Button by White Stripes

High Horse Lady by Oasis

and.........................Magic Carpet Ride by Steppenwolf! :)

And yes, in this chapter Ichigo and Haya meet for the first time :) Muhahahahahahahaha.... you'll see the reason for the evil laugh soon enough!

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**Chapter 10: Meet The Rock Stars**

"That's Kyouraku Taicho." Ikkaku said pointing at the pink haori clad Taicho and the girl nodded. "His lieutenant Ise Nanao. This is the lieutenant of the 10th Division Matsumoto Rangiku. That's Hisagi Shuuhei, Taicho of the 9th Division…"

"I know Hisagi-san." She said in her soft, sultry voice and nodded to Hisagi and waved to him. "Hey."

"What? Uh… ok…" Ikkaku stuttered, but continued with the introductions, "Abarai Renji, Taicho of the 3rd Division, Kuchiki Rukia, fukutaicho of the 13th…"

"And that's Izuru Kira, Abarai Taicho's fukutaicho and Hinamori Momo, Kurosaki Taicho's fukutaicho." Finished the girl for Ikkaku. "I'm not a complete idiot Ikka. I've been here fourteen years now. You really think I don't know the Taicho and fukutaicho in the Gotei?"

She looked away from the fuming Ikkaku and addressed us before he had a chance to say any more, "I'm Madarame Haya, 9th seat of the 11th Division and no, I am not related to this twit." She said casually throw a wave to all of us.

She walked over to where Hisagi was seated and sat down near him. "What're you drinking?" She asked him.

"How does she know Hisagi?" I asked Ikkaku, studying the strange girl.

"I have no idea!" He exclaimed. "Oi Haya! How do you two know each other?"

"He's my guitar-sensei. Gave me some pointers. We jam sometimes." She shrugged.

Hisagi is what? I raised an eyebrow when Hisagi's eyes met mine. "Guitar sensei?" I asked.

He colored slightly and coughed uncomfortably. "Uh… sorry Hisagi." She said looking at her friend. "They don't know you can play the guitar?"

"Oh we know he can let loose some awful noise with those strings, but a _sensei_?" I asked looking around the table to see that everyone was equally surprised.

"I practiced in private because nobody here appreciates music." He muttered angrily.

"Tell us more Madarame-san. Where did Hisagi learn to play the guitar?" Shunsui said glancing at the girl.

"Please call me Haya." She said looking around the table. "And yeah… I think it was Chad, one of Kurosaki Taicho's friends, who taught him to play. But he's really good now." She said softly with a sincere nod.

"Haya!" Exclaimed Hisagi glowering at his friend.

"What?" She asked Hisagi with a shrug. "It's true." Hisagi glowered in response but didn't say anything. Clearly they knew each other quite well, despite the fact that she used his last name. There was a familiarity between them that was hard to ignore.

I glanced at Shunsui and saw that he was studying the girl too. This was after all the girl Ikkaku had lent his last name too, the girl who had lasted 20 minutes against Zaraki straight out of the Academy, the infamous 'sparker'.

She didn't talk much and what little she did was spoken softly in that soft, almost seductive tone of hers. Her words were always cool and dispassionate, but the voice took the edge off, for us anyway. I got the feeling that it wasn't something that happened all the time. She chuckled at the jokes that went around the table but never quite smiled, raised her cup every time a toast was raised but didn't drink herself senseless and silently continued to study us all with those dark, blue-black eyes.

"Interesting, isn't she?" Murmured Nanao in my ear.

"Hmm." I continued my appraisal from over my cup of sake, noting the long dark hair, the deep, mysterious eyes and the formidable looking scars that ran down her face. Her lips were surprisingly luscious breaking the hard lines of her face and I would later see that she was capable of a very, endearing smile. The billowing uniform that she was dressed in hid her lithe body, but her fluid movements belied an innate agility and speed. She was thin but not skinny, petit but not short, well endowed but not voluptuous.

"What do you think?" I asked Nanao, "I'd say she's a 7…"

"More like an 8, Rangiku-san." Shunsui murmured winking at me, and Nanao whacked him immediately. "My Nanao-chan! You're a 10!"

I turned away from the feuding couple and turned to the girl. "Haya-san, if you've been here for fourteen years, why haven't you come out drinking with us before?"

"Because Matsumoto-san it's hard enough being a Madarame without hanging out with all his friends who are Taicho and fukutaicho." She said inclining her head towards Ikkaku. "He doesn't even bother telling people we're not related anymore."

"That's because he likes being known as your brother Haya-chan." Yumichika said, approaching our table.

Her eyes lit up for a mere second and I could have sworn I saw a smile grace her lips, but it was gone in an instant.

"He just _loves_ it when people come and ask him about his sister, the one who 'sparks' and once put 16 men in the 4th Division in one day." Yumichika continued as he settled down at the table, smiling at Ikkaku who was coloring at the comments.

"Che!" Ikkaku spat in embarrassment. "That's such a load of shit. I just got tired of denying it. What's the big deal anyway? You should be glad people think I'm your brother!" He stated angrily to Haya.

"Ikka you moron, no one takes me seriously when they think I'm your sister." She said scowling at her surrogate brother's stupidity. "It took me freaking months to just get the division to stop picking on me and even after that every time I get promoted I have to go through a series of challenges from the lower seated incompetents who think I got promoted because of you." She threw back another cup of sake.

"Why do you think I never came to hang out with this lot before now?" She pointed to everyone at the table with a lazy finger. "Arguably the most fun drinking group in all of Sereitei but they're all captains and lieutenants. You don't hang out with people like that and not get branded a groupie."

"A what?" Asked Renji.

"A groupie. It's actually a term that applies to rock bands…" she started to explain but was cut off by another voice.

"A chic who stalks a band because she idolizes them." Rukia laughed lightly as she finished for Haya.

Haya smiled slightly at Rukia. "Exactly Kuchiki-san, a crazy stalker chic who loves the attention of famous people." She paused looking at Rukia carefully, "I'd forgotten that you spent a lot of time in the living world."

"It was a while ago, but I remember most of it." Rukia said with a little shrug. The girl nodded slowly and looked around the table and raised a cup of sake.

"Well I'm here now, so here's to the rock stars of Sereitei." She said with a small smile, but none of her smiles reached her eyes and they stayed clouded, curtaining her thoughts.

We all toasted with her and Ikkaku ordered more sake.

"I like her." Shunsui decided throwing back his cup of sake, waiting for my verdict.

"I haven't quite decided yet…"

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"You missed it Ichigo!" Renji was saying enthusiastically. "That bar fight was the most amazing thing I have seen in decades!"

I listened disinterestedly to him recount story after story about the 'sparking' girl whose mere presence initiated bar brawls. Of course, it's just what Sereitei had needed after all, another crazy addition to the 11th Division.

"She jumped clear over the guy's head and then hit his friend with a tray! SMACK! Straight in the face." Renji said, using his hands to animate and punctuate the story.

"Yes, yes Renji. Great fight." I said hoping he would stop soon.

"I kinda like her." Rukia said, sipping on her tea.

"What, not you too?" I asked aghast. "Are you going to start spewing stories about this brat too?"

She rolled her eyes at me. "She's not all bar fights Ichigo. She's _different_. She doesn't talk much, but when she does she's usually funny. And she's not a giddy, girly chic either."

"So she wears no make up, and can't do her hair and is basically ugly?" I asked.

"Yes, yes and no. She is not ugly. She's hard to describe." Rukia said calmly, refusing to be baited.

"She's not hard to describe." I scoffed. "I saw her at the Academy exam all those years ago. She's the one with the scars, isn't she? She's nothing special."

"That was fourteen years ago Ichigo." Rukia said hitting me lightly on the back of my hand.

"Yeah Ichigo, that was fourteen years ago." Renji agreed, "She was a scrawny kid then, now she's…." he trailed off as Rukia turned to him.

"She's what?" She asked innocently as she turned to face her childhood friend and now boyfriend.

"Nothing! She's nothing!" Renji cried raising his arms defensively for the punches that would surely come. "I completely agree with Ichigo, she's nothing special!"

Rukia glared at him for a while but decided to let it slide. "Baka!" She muttered, before turning to look at me again. "But either way, I like her. She's direct and fun and I like her." She said with a note of finality in her voice, indicating the end of the debate.

"You should see her fight Ichigo." Renji said again, "That sparking thing she does… it's really something. I haven't seen anything like it."

"Hmm…" I said with a bored wave of my hand. "Maybe I'll catch one of her bar brawls sometime…"

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"Four months." Haya repeated softly, as she sipped on a glass of orange juice.

"What? You chickening out?" Taunted Taicho from the end of the table.

"Che!" She replied in disdain. "I'm just planning out my training."

"What? I'm the one in charge of your training!" I snapped at her.

"You are in charge of the nitty gritty details, I'm thinking big picture. I have stuff to do around the Division as well. Plus I have to feed you morons."

"Who're you calling a moron?" Growled Taicho.

"The other three." She answered glibly. "More tea anyone?" She asked looking around the table.

It began with tea every morning and then grew to include toast and orange juice. And then suddenly just like that we were having a hearty breakfast every morning. I had no idea how she did but it was great and I wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth.

"Let's get to it then." I called to her and she rose from the table.

"Yumichika, dishes are yours today." She waggled a finger anticipating objections.

"But…" Yumichika tried to protest.

"Use the gloves, they should protect your nails. Don't pout, it ain't gonna work this time. I have only 4 months to give Taicho a good fight." She said walking out of the kitchen with me.

"Bye Pachinko-chan! Bye Haya-chan!" Squealed Yachiru behind us.

"How come she doesn't use your nickname anymore?" I grumbled.

"You'll have to ask her." She smiled mischievously.

"It's the cookies isn't it? That's why you bake so often! Sneaky little bitch."

"Pachinko."

"Scarface."

"Moon-head."

"Ga..OW!" She'd zapped me between the eyes, AGAIN! "I'm your fucking sensei now, you can't keep doing that!"

"Sure I can. Besides, you've been training me since I got here Ikka, so don't give me that sensei crap now."

"OW! Shimatta Haya!"

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"And I am here because?" I asked coldly. Rukia had a lot to say about this queer girl and my curiosity was piqued but there was no reason to admit to that.

"Because we're captains and we're going to check out this girl who's supposedly a formidable fighter." Kurosaki explained.

"And?"

"And she's got some really strange reiatsu and Zaraki's challenged her to a fight in less than two months and that's going to determine if she gets to be 4th Seat or not."

"And this concerns us because?"

"Byakuya! Just go with me! Didn't you hear the bit about the strange reiatsu?" He exclaimed in frustration.

"Yes I did. And I fail to understand why that should interest me. That would appear to be reason for Kurotsuchi to check on the girl…" We were headed in the direction of the 11th Division and Kurosaki didn't seem to realize that I had agreed the moment I stepped out of my office with him. No reason not to irritate the man when he made it so easy.

"Yes but Zaraki has threatened the entire 12th Division. If anyone goes near her, he has promised to raze the division to the ground." He said looking puzzled. "I don't know what the story is, but it's all a little strange. She shares Ikkaku's last name because she couldn't remember her own…"

"So the 11th is a little protective of the infamous 'sparker'."

"Something like that." He nodded and we continued on in silence until we got to the 11th Division training grounds.

I had seen the girl at the Academy exam when Zaraki had called on her to fight. She had grinned at him equally manically and lunged at him carelessly. Needless to say the fight ended with her defeat, but she had withstood the deranged captain for almost 20 minutes. And now, almost fifteen years later, there was to be an encore.

I had no interest in the girl per say, but her abilities were making people nervous. If history had taught us anything, it was that sometimes the ones closest to us posed the gravest danger.

Familiar sounds of a fight reached our ears long before the fighters came into view. We were still quite far away, but we could see the two now as bokken struck bokken and blows were traded. Ikkaku was taller than the girl and was using his height advantage to bear down on the girl.

"Taicho is stronger than me Haya. You're gonna have to do better than that." He said, taunting her before hitting the right side of her ribs with the bokken.

She reeled back in pain and although her voice was soft, her words carried quite clearly over the wind, "But the fight will include more than zanjutsu Ikka. You know I can take him on with my shikai."

"Maybe, that's still to be seen." He said frowning, "For now, we continue."

The girl was clearly tiring and I saw her hands start to tremble under the strain.

"Wonder how long they've been training…" Kurosaki murmured more to himself than me.

"It is unimportant. She is clearly incapable of fighting Madarame, let alone Zaraki." I observed.

"Ikkaku's zanjutsu technique is not something to be taken lightly." He said, and I scoffed. Peasants!

The girl was defending more than attacking now and leaped clear over Ikkaku's head when he cornered her.

"Ha! And you said my daily runs were a waste of time!" She exclaimed smugly.

"You can't jump over Taicho! He'll kill you." Ikkaku pointed out sensibly.

"But I can jump over you." She pointed at him with a finger and winked.

Ikkaku narrowed his eyes and attacked once more and she used a series of kido spells to defend herself.

"Haya if you're going to rely on that pansy shit, Taicho's gonna skin you alive!" He reminded her again. "OW!" He stood running a finger across his forehead. "Haya! OWWW! QUIT IT!"

"You were picking on my weaker side, now it's payback." She said with an evil grin and continued to torment the man. All we saw were occasional sparks, but clearly they were hurting Ikkaku. So this was the 'sparking' I had heard so much about. It was clearly not a very strong weapon and only served to aggravate one's opponent. Clearly a trait that only an 11th Division fighter would be able to find a use for.

"Haya stop it! We're supposed to be training!" He exclaimed angrily, glaring at the girl.

"Yeah but we have company." She said and turned to face Kurosaki and myself.

I heard Kurosaki inhale sharply and I glanced at him through the corner of my eye. He was gaping at the girl in the most base, ludicrous fashion possible and I was annoyed.

"Get a hold of yourself Kurosaki. You're a captain in the Gotei, do not embarrass your office by behaving like a lowly deviant." I snapped and he blinked in embarrassment before turning to face Ikkaku.

"Oi Ikkaku!" He waved and we started to walk towards the two 11th Division Shinigami.

"Ichigo! I didn't know you were here." He called to us with a wave, "But of course _you_ would." He said to the girl who merely shrugged in response. So she sensed reiatsu well…

"Come to check out my little fighter?" Ikkaku asked smiling proudly, hands propped on his hips in smug satisfaction.

"_Your_ little fighter?" Asked the girl, raising an eyebrow at the man beside her who scowled at her irritably.

"I'm the one training you aren't I?" He demanded angrily.

"So? It's not like I asked for you and it's not like you asked for it either. Taicho made you do it." She said calmly.

"How do you know I didn't ask Taicho to put me in charge of your training?" He asked.

"Oh _ANIKI_! Did you?" Twittered the girl, in a mocking, sweet voice.

The two continued to squabble and I saw that Kurosaki was smiling at the sight. Clearly this girl was making a very strong impression on my companion. I made a note to myself to carefully watch him, and to keep him from doing anything injudicious and unbecoming of his position as a captain.

The girl turned to face us as we approached. "Kuchiki Taicho, Kurosaki Taicho." She said bowing to each of us in greeting.

"Madarame-san." Kurosaki responded and I settled for a nod. She was studying us carefully, but did not venture to question our presence. She may have shared Ikkaku's last name, but clearly did not share any of his brashness.

"How is your preparation for the fight coming?" Kurosaki asked her.

"It's coming along Kurosaki Taicho. Thank you for asking." She replied as she trained her dark eyes on him and I saw him start to fidget again.

"Ichigo, help me a minute." Ikkaku said to Kurosaki. "She thinks she can pull pansy stunts on the Taicho. Will you show her what will happen if she tries that shit?"

"Why me?" Demanded Kurosaki scowling at Ikkaku.

"Because he can't catch me." The girl said softly, her eyes glinting smugly and a small smile playing on her lips. "And you're taller than he is."

Ikkaku snarled at her but did not disagree. Kurosaki stepped forward reaching out for Ikkaku's bokken, "Ok then, let's go."

"So you wanna see my evasive tactics?" She asked, moving into a fighting stance.

"Whatever you want… it makes no difference." Kurosaki said, turning to face the girl. In a flash, he was attacking the girl taking her by surprise. She blocked the attack but was thrown onto her back foot and was forced to resort to her 'evasive tactics'. She stepped back from Kurosaki before quickly trying to vault over him, but he was prepared for it and grabbed her ankle. He flung her backwards and she flailed helplessly, but not before leaving a clear imprint of her sandal on Kurosaki's face.

"Bitch!" He exclaimed angrily, turning to glare at the girl who was picking herself up slowly from the dust over 15 feet away. I couldn't be sure because it was so fleeting, but I think I saw the girl grin.

"And that is what will happen if you try to jump over Taicho." Ikkaku said with his arms crossed across his chest. "And Taicho's taller than Ichigo too. So please listen to me when I say you cannot rely on these party tricks."

She nodded slowly. "Hai. Arigato Kurosaki Taicho." She said softly looking at Kurosaki.

"Yeah whatever." He said with an angry embarrassed wave of his hand. "Can I go now?" He asked Ikkaku testily who shrugged in response.

"You came here! I didn't call you." He said which only made Kurosaki angrier.

"Che!" He exclaimed and glanced at me before stalking off angrily.

"Good luck Madarame-san." I murmured before turning to follow Kurosaki. I did not smile at the memory of her sandal landing on his face.

XxX-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------XxX------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------XxX----------------------------------------------------------------------------XxX

Hahahahahahahahaha! Who else here is imaging the look on Ichigo's face?!

Ok guys c'mon! Please leave me some reviews?! I know you're reading this stuff, tell me if it sucks! I've even opened up the anonymous reviews! PUHLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	11. Chapter 11

Enough of dwelling on the past, we can do that later! On with the story!

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**Chapter 11: Time To Face The Orange**

"Morning Taicho!" Chirped my fukutaicho cheerfully, as I walked into her kitchen.

"You don't need to call me that." She had been my fukutaicho for a month now but I had still not gotten used to the title, not from her mouth anyway. It just sounded wrong, especially with Zaraki in the same room.

"Well you are my Taicho, what do you want me to call you?" She asked doing a rendition of Matsumoto's best look of confusion.

"Yes what should she call you, Hisagi Taicho?" Twittered Matsumoto, a scowl of mock confusion taking over her features as well.

"Stop bullying your Taicho Haya." Zaraki rumbled, making the situation worse.

"Yeah Haya-chan! Stop bullying your Taicho!" squealed Yachiru grinning at me. "Good morning Taicho-chan!"

"Morning everyone." I hissed at the group at the kitchen table. Haya becomes my fukutaicho and suddenly I'm the butt of all their jokes. Whatever happened to the dignity of being a Captain in the Gotei?

I turned my attention to the only one who hadn't mocked me. "You're on my side aren't ya, Roxy?" I asked scratching her ears the way I had seen Haya do. She looked suitably satisfied with my attention but the naughty gleam in her eyes left me with the lingering feeling that if she could have joined in the teasing, she would have.

"I'm sorry Hisagi. I shouldn't pick on you so early in the morning." Haya smiled as she poured me a cup of tea. "I promise I'll wait until after lunch tomorrow!"

The playful banter continued as Haya laid out the food on the large kitchen table. Breakfast at her place had become a constant routine for the seven present today, with the occasional visit from Ukitake when temptation curbed his sense of propriety. It was nice that things were slowly returning to the way they were before the Inoue debacle.

Haya's little taunt about her and me being a thing had not helped my already precarious relationship with Kurosaki, but Kuchiki had assured me that he would talk some sense into the hotheaded orange-haired Taicho. Rukia and Renji had initially been a little uncomfortable around her, but Haya's easygoing ways had soon soothed over their fears of any harbored resentment. After all, if she had a problem with them she would have just called them out to a fight like she had Kurosaki.

As peaceful as things seemed, the tense undercurrents were hard to ignore. We all still carefully avoided any issues concerning Kurosaki despite Haya's assurances. "Kurosaki Ichigo. There I said his name and didn't burst into tears! Isn't that the most amazing thing!" She had exclaimed sarcastically. But despite her obvious immunity to mentions of his name she still avoided him and the 11th still bared their teeth at him (Yachiru liked to kick him in the shins), which still made me feel like I was walking on eggshells.

And considering the news I had today, things were going to soon come to a head.

"So… um… I have some news." I said and I soon felt the eyes of everyone at the table on me.

"Yeah?" Ikkaku huffed in his characteristic manner, chugging back the last of his orange juice.

"Renji and Rukia are getting married."

-----------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------

'Uh-oh.' I thought as Hisagi dropped the bomb on us.

"That's awesome!" Cried Haya, "and about time too!"

"What does Kuchiki have to say about it?" Asked Zaraki glancing at me.

"He was against it but seems to have come around for whatever reason. The Kuchiki elders still don't like it but they don't really have a say in it anymore now that Kuchiki Taicho has agreed to the wedding."

"Oh this is interesting." Haya rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "I really didn't think Kuchiki would agree. I wonder what changed his mind."

"She said she would elope if he didn't agree to it." Yumichika added quietly and they turned to him in surprise.

"You KNEW?" Haya exclaimed. "And you were planning on telling us when? The day before the wedding?"

"More like the morning of the wedding." Ikkaku grumbled. "Why the fuck didn't ya tell us?"

"She told me not to!" Yumichika pouted angrily. "Besides Ran-chan knew about it too."

Yumichika you ass! I shrugged and gave them my best bimbo grin, but these were my closest friends and I convinced no one.

"Ran, I can't believe you didn't tell me." Haya looked confused. "What's with the secrecy anyway?"

Zaraki's eyes met mine in warning. "Well… she just asked me not to tell anyone and so I didn't. I didn't even know Yumichika knew about it." I said as convincingly as possible.

Haya looked doubtfully at Yumichika and me but didn't question us further. Ikkaku had remained silent through the whole conversation but the lights seemed to be coming on slowly in his head and he didn't question me either. Yachiru's silence had been bought with a piece of cake, which Yumichika had thoughtfully placed before her while the 'adults' talked.

Shortly after, Haya and Hisagi left for their office a short distance away with Roxy trotting behind them, and we began walking to our divisions. I felt Zaraki's hand on my elbow as we neared the 10th Division offices and I slowed down just a little bit. "Is she going to be alright?" He said softly in my ear.

"I don't know, we'll just have to wait and see."

He wasn't convinced, his silence indicating his worry.

"We all knew this would happen sometime. She can't avoid Kurosaki forever."

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OMG they're gonna meet again!!! :D

Review pls! And yes that means you! Yes you! Hit that button and give me a review!!!!!!!!


	12. Chapter 12

RainDrops, this one is for you! :) I hope I didnt butcher him too much. I tried to keep him as stiff and ..... STIFF as possible.... You'll see what i mean when you read on. :D

And yeah i think i've been forgetting to add the disclaimers!!! OMG!!! Well unfortunately, Tite Kubo owns everything n' I'm a pauper who owns nothing. :(There is no justice in this world!

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**Chapter 12: All That Is Kuchiki**

"Hey Rukia!" I heard the girl say as she stepped into the office. "Is Ukitake taicho around?"

"Um… he's here but he's with a visitor." Rukia answered sounding a little stilted.

"Oh. Is it alright if I wait?" she asked. "I did need to talk to you as well!"

"Um… yes… about that…" Rukia stammered.

"Congratulations dummy! I can't believe you didn't tell me! How terrible, terrible, TERRIBLE of you Rukia-chan! I heard from Hisagi taicho, _Hisagi_ _taicho_ of all people. I'm gonna pummel Renji for not… what?" Her voice trailed and I assumed it was because Rukia had somehow managed to tell her I was here. "Ah…" I heard her whisper conspiratorially. "But is it alright if I wait anyway?" She whispered, her voice carrying through into Ukitake's office despite her best efforts.

"Try not to look so smug Byakuya-kun." Ukitake teased. I stiffened and wished my emotions were not so obvious to my sensei.

"Would you mind very much if I asked her to join us? This is a friendly visit after all." Ukitake said smoothly, quirking a mischievous eyebrow.

I couldn't object. We were in his office discussing the weather for I had only stopped by to torment Rukia and he knew it.

"Haya-san! How nice of you to visit!" I heard him say. "Rukia, I think you can finish anything that's pending tomorrow."

"But…" Rukia tried to object but was cut off by Haya and Ukitake.

"Go enjoy your evening, it's a wonderful summer day." Ukitake urged.

"That's what I said but she wouldn't listen to me!" Haya said. "I'm sure Renji's waiting for you."

Rukia gasped and I smiled smugly at the knowledge that I still made her nervous. Ukitake laughed lightly. "Come Haya. There's no coffee and I don't know how to brew tea the way you do, but I can give you some green tea."

"Sounds good Juu. Rox, you stay out here and be a good girl. Don't pick on Sentarou just 'cause he's scared of you. Behave!" I heard Ukitake chuckle at the instructions she left with her dog. "It would be tragic if everyone could brew my tea, you and Shun would never visit if that happened." She said strolling into his office but came to an abrupt halt when she saw me. "Good afternoon Kuchiki Taicho." She said, with a little bow.

I nodded. "Madarame fukutaicho."

"How're things at the 6th Division?" She asked sitting down at the table.

"Very well, thank you for asking fukutaicho. I trust you are doing well at the 9th Division?"

"Yes things are going alright." She smiled at Ukitake, who handed her a cup of tea. "Arigato Ukitake Taicho. The division is still getting used to the idea of a fukutaicho, but other than that I guess it's alright."

"A period of adjustment?" Ukitake asked sipping his tea.

"Yes, well. I'm new and they don't really know me. I wasn't around for two years and then suddenly one day I'm their fukutaicho. Then there is my association with the 11th Division. I guess they just need a little time to get used to it all."

"Are you reconsidering your transfer to the 9th?" I felt compelled to ask, knowing Kurosaki would be dying to know. Why was I involving myself in his tumultuous love life?

"God no! I like working with Hisagi taicho. We make a good team." She said calmly, her eyes trained on me. "I thought you were aware of that Kuchiki taicho." She was clearly alluding to the fact that I had been the one to keep Kurosaki from making a complete fool of himself before the entire Gotei.

She was not in awe of my nobility and she let me know every chance she got. She was never rude making it impossible for me to react to her words with anything but civility.

"I am aware of the fact that you make an acceptable musical duo, but the relationship between a Taicho and his fukutaicho is a little more complex, don't you agree Madarame fukutaicho?" I could feel Ukitake's amused gaze on us but I was curious about what this girl had to say to me. She never initiated a conversation otherwise.

My use of the word 'acceptable' had not escaped her and I saw a little smile tug on her lips, but she continued in her serious mien. "Of course Kuchiki taicho and I am sure you know more about this than I do. I have only been a fukutaicho for two months now. Did Abarai taicho have a hard time when he transferred to your division as fukutaicho? He was new at the time too, was he not?"

How could I have not seen this coming? "Yes he did have a period of adjustment, but he had not been away for two years prior to his promotion and was thus, familiar with a few of the seated members within the division." I said as sedately as possible, all the while glaring daggers at the girl.

She seemed oblivious to it and merely replied with a, "Hmm," before turning to Ukitake and enquiring about his health.

"If you'll excuse me Ukitake taicho, I think I'll take my leave." I said interrupting her.

"Oh… of course Byakuya-kun. Please visit again, I so look forward to our little chats." Ukitake said politely, but his little emphasis on chats was not lost on me and I knew I was going to be hearing from him soon.

"Kuchiki Taicho, if it's not too much of a bother…" the girl was saying raising her hand like she was in a classroom.

"Yes fukutaicho?"

"Can I come by and raid your library sometime? I haven't had a decent book to read ever since I got back from the living world."

"Of course fukutaicho. You may come by anytime you wish."

"Arigato Taicho! I prefer to come when you're around, would later this evening be all right?" She asked, her voice even and nonchalant but her eyes begged me to say yes.

"Come by at 7 fukutaicho. I will leave word that you are to be shown to the library." I said and left after bowing in respect to Ukitake sensei.

Her pointed remarks about Renji had annoyed me but I could not begrudge her that. I could not presume that she would understand the nuances of nobility.

She was a peculiar creature and it had not surprised me when Kurosaki had become besotted with her. She was brash and tough like others that came from Rukongai, but was also well aware of social etiquette. I had noted her tendency to call many captains by their first name in private but always spoke of them with the necessary respect in their absence and never tried to use her familiarity with them to her advantage. And she was a good fighter, a very good fighter.

The first time she had come asking for a book, I had been stunned and had agreed quite accidentally. What could a girl from Rukongai want with books from my library? I had thought scoffing at the very notion. "She remembers a lot from when she was alive Byakuya-san." Kurosaki had tried to explain. "She was very well educated. How else do you think she is so familiar with all the technical crap that Kurotsuchi spews? And the music? How do you explain that?"

"A travelling circus? A group of gypsies?" I had suggested coldly, choosing to ignore the bit about her technological know-how. "Street corner performers?"

Kurosaki had shaken his head and laughed. She and I had become acquainted through Kurosaki during their torrid relationship and I had enjoyed our occasional exchange of retorts. She had been a worthy opponent. The end of the affair had brought with it the inevitable division of assets, in this case, friends and acquaintances. Although I hadn't wished to land on _any_ side of the divide I had been handed over to Kurosaki, along with Rukia, Renji and Hitsugaya. The 11th Division along with Matsumoto had gone to the girl, while the rest had struggled to stay neutral.

"Ah, my consolation prizes." Kurosaki had remarked dryly.

"Kurosaki," I warned, "don't alienate the few allies you have."

-----------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------

I approached the intimidating mansion and loathed the idea of going in. I had stopped borrowing books from Byakuya solely because I hated coming here. The house was cold and drafty and was a constant 2 degrees below freezing the whole year round, like a walk-in meat freezer. The servants were nasty and the extended Kuchiki family was nastier. I loved his library but it was not the worth losing a couple of digits to frost bite and so I had quit going.

Byakuya was odd to say the least. Cold and dispassionate in public, obsessed over a dead wife behind closed doors and the closest thing he had to a friend was a brash, impulsive Vizard with orange hair. If that doesn't make one odd, what does? All in all, he was interesting. I wouldn't go as far as calling him a friend but we had become acquainted when Kurosaki and I were together.

I wrapped Roxy's leash around a pike outside the gate and didn't bother telling her to be nice. If any of the servants heckled her, I wanted her to feel free to give them a well deserved mauling. My arrival was not unexpected and as promised, a nasty grumbling servant led me to the library.

"Here you are, m'lady." He mocked. I shook my head wearily, the servants and I had been through this dance a hundred times and it was the reason why I had asked to come while Kuchiki was home. The mocking and taunting were infinitely worse when he wasn't around.

I gave him my best airhead smile and said, "Arigate osan. I'm sure I would have gotten completely lost without your assistance."

The mocking smile fell from his lips when he realized that his insults had made no impression. I closed the door on his gloomy scowl with another bimbo smile and added a giggle to further infuriate the man.

"Must you tease the help?" Byakuya demanded from behind me.

"Oh!" I started, "I did not think you would be here Kuchiki taicho. I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but you know you can trust me in your library. I won't burn it down."

"But you might leave food stains on one of my books again." I winced as he alluded to the time Ikkaku had spilt soup all over one of his priceless first editions; the _other_ reason why I had stopped coming here.

Would this man never forget about that? I looked up to see a smug smirk tugging on the corner of lips. "That's low Kuchiki taicho. You know I would pawn everything I had to get you another copy." Yes Byakuya, I just played the _filthy lucre_ card. Take that!

His eyes narrowed and glared at me for an instant before strolling over to a large table. "Tea?"

"Thank you Taicho." He obviously wanted to talk or he wouldn't be here, so I played along. "Is it alright if I browse?"

"Of course. That is what you came for, isn't it?" Came the cold reply.

The man was infuriating and certainly gave me a run for my money. On good days I could trip Juushiro up and he was certainly one of the best, but to do that with Byakuya took a lot of careful planning. This evening's slip up was more a result of his carelessness than any intelligent spur on my part. Rukia's wedding was clearly bothering him more than he let on.

I noticed he had added to his vast collection and quickly picked one from one of my favorite authors (not a first edition). He handed me my tea and looked at me expectantly.

I raised an eyebrow in question but didn't say anything.

"Fukutaicho."

"Kuchiki taicho." I said waiting.

"Why did you join the 9th Division?"

Aha! "Because I passed the fukutaicho exam and there was no reason for me to settle for anything less than a lieutenant's position. I think it goes without saying that there is no way in hell I am going to step into the 12th Division, let alone work there." I answered evenly. I wasn't lying. It was _one_ of the reasons why I chose to transfer.

"And?" He insisted looking unconvinced.

"And Hisagi Taicho is someone I am acquainted with…"

"Acquainted with?" he interrupted

"All right, if you insist. He's a friend. As you yourself pointed out Taicho, we make an _acceptable _musical duo. Even the _least _tolerable of musical duos only exist if there is a certain level of understanding between the two musicians."

I met his eyes and challenged him to question my motives further, but he did not. "Now may I ask you a question Taicho?"

"Excuse me?" His voice went very, very cold and his cold, hard eyes were trained on me at the obvious breach of etiquette. As a captain he could question me all he liked, but now I was clearly disregarding his position as a noble and a captain.

"With your permission only Taicho. I would not presume to put forth questions that do not relate to our work without your permission." He could say no, it would be completely within his rights to do so, but that would mean admitting defeat in our little battle of words. He nodded for me to proceed.

"Why do you object so strongly to Rukia's choice in a husband?" I felt the full force of his icy glare on me now and I had obviously hit a nerve because his reiatsu spiked dangerously.

"You were right earlier, you should not presume to question me." He growled.

I inclined my head unperturbed, set the cup of tea down. "This is true Kuchiki Taicho. I'm sorry if I offended you Kuchiki Taicho. Thank you for the book, I will return…"

"He is an uncouth commoner from Rukongai and Rukia deserves better." His voice was even, but his perturbed reiatsu spoke volumes.

I looked up at him so that he could see that I was up to the challenge. "Rukia is also from Rukongai, they have known each other for decades…"

"Paltry excuses for a bad match." His voice was tinged with rage.

I took a deep breath before continuing. "As an equally uncouth commoner from Rukongai, I have to tell you – life within these walls makes it quite impossible to understand or appreciate the harsh realities of Rukongai."

"I am well aware of that…"

"Taicho, forgive me. But you don't know what you're talking about."

Byakuya was infuriated by my last comment and I supposed it was only his years of trained self-control that kept him from slicing me into tiny bits with Senbonzakura. Inadzuma quivered on my hip and I prayed I wouldn't need his help.

"None other than one from Rukongai can ever really know what life is like there, and she deserves that understanding." I continued, staking everything on his self-restraint. "Understanding Taicho, not empathy and certainly not pity."

He glared at me in silence and his reiatsu subsided marginally so I added, "Rukia is definitely the best thing that ever happened to Renji, but in a strange way he is also the best thing that ever happened to her. You can rest assured that he will move heaven and earth to protect her, isn't that more than you could really ask for in a husband for your sister?"

"I swore to act in her best interests." He said emotion creeping into his voice. "How can I possibly give her my blessing if I do not believe her to be making the right choice."

"If there are objections to be made, make them for the right reasons. You swore to protect her and you should, because you are the only one that can. You dragged her into this mess by adopting her, now help her when she needs it. Don't let the Kuchiki family bind her in antiquated laws and traditions." I paused and he glared at my obvious disrespect. "Kuchiki Taicho." I added quickly.

I shifted uneasily as silence enveloped the room and I wasn't sure if he had anything more to say. "If you will let me take my leave Kuchiki Taicho…"

"Kurosaki will be at the wedding and he intends to talk to you."

Of all the cheap and dirty tricks to fall back on, he had to pick this one. And boy was it effective! I bolted from the room in a swirl of undignified, agitated shunpo.

-----------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------

I hadn't seen Haya since the fukutaicho exam and the only time I heard about her was when Byakuya would notice my starvation and drop a few lines of gossip my way.

"She is not involved with the Taicho of the 9th." He said out of the blue.

"What?" I had asked trying not to sound like a hormonal teenager.

"I met her at Ukitake sensei's office and then again when she came to borrow a book." He droned on as if we were talking about the warm barmy summer we were having. This was about Haya for Kami's sake! Why couldn't he just get on with it and tell me what she'd said?

"She borrowed a book? When?"

"A week ago."

A whole week and he was telling me now? "I see."

He turned his steely eyes on me, a satisfied smug glint shone in them. "She should be coming by to return it one of these days."

"I see." I said again unable to think straight at the moment. "You were saying something about Ukitake-san."

"Was I? Yes, I met her there. She said she was having a little trouble adjusting with the division."

"Is she planning to transfer out?" Please, please, please…

"No it appears she likes it there." The bastard was toying with me! "In fact, she said that Hisagi Taicho and she make a good team."

I closed my eyes and imagined my hands tightening that aristocratic scarf around his neck, _slowly._ Yes very, very slowly…

"Kurosaki Taicho? Are you listening to me?" He asked softly, thoroughly enjoying himself.

"Of course I am. Good team, I heard you." I hissed.

"She also had something to say about Rukia's wedding."

"Oh?" Of course she did. She was probably doing a delighted little jig knowing how much this was annoying Byakuya.

"I hate to admit it, but she did elucidate an interesting point." He said, sounding just a tad hesitant. Kuchiki Byakuya sounding hesitant? "She said that no noble would understand Rukia's life before she arrived in Sereitei."

I waited for him to continue. "She also said that I had been the one to force the mantle of nobility onto Rukia's shoulders. If I had sworn to protect her I should do so, even if it was from the Kuchiki elders themselves."

'Haya…why won't you let me hate you a just little?' I thought. "Well isn't that what I said to you?" I snapped at Byakuya.

"You said Abarai was a 'stand up guy despite his red hair'."

"It amounts to the same thing!" I snapped, but he didn't think so.

Shortly after he left, I handed over the division to Momo and departed as well, walking home in a despondent daze. She was everywhere and yet… nowhere. The 'Haya presence' rippled outwards around her and although I had been cast off to the far fringes, I could still feel a ripple every now and then. Just often enough to never let me forget, just strong enough to remind me what had drawn me to her.

She was strong, infuriatingly stubborn and cloaked herself in an air of hardness I surmised was a result of the brutal years she had spent in Rukongai. But she could be surprisingly thoughtful and often went to unnecessary lengths to help the people around her. Rukia had scoffed at the idea that Inoue was an unstable psychopath just as much as I had, and yet here she was trying to smooth things over for her with Byakuya.

Her relationship with Byakuya was another mystery. She was one of the few people not intimidated by him. "People call him cold, but that's ridiculous." She had said. "He still obsesses about a woman that died nearly a century ago. Obsessions are not the result of passing fancy Ichigo, but a slow burning fire! To call him cold is utterly ridiculous! He has a temper, oh yes there is a very nasty tempter lurking in there somewhere. But the kenseiken in his hair and the scarf around his neck will always keep it in check. He is about as likely to pull Senbonzakura on you as he is to laugh out loud at one of his own jokes."

I was walking around aimlessly and found my feet turning in the direction of our old haunts. The grounds near the 11th Division where I first saw her training, then again on her many runs, where she had zapped me between the eyes for watching her as she stretched after a particularly grueling training session.

"Oh Kami! Kurosaki taicho, Kuchiki taicho! I am so sorry, I didn't know it was the two of you!" She had gushed in embarrassment as we stood there rubbing the smarting burns. "Ikkaku and Yumichika often try to sneak up on me with some prank or the other, I just assumed it was them. I'm so tired and I sensed two different reiatsus.... I didn't bother trying to check if it was really them…"

"How come you singed my eyebrow and not his?" I had demanded when I saw that Byakuya's forehead barely showed a mark.

"Well I thought he was Yumichika. He's got his reiatsu under better control…" She had looked mortified as she tried to apologize to the two of us but in that moment all I had wanted to do was lean down and kiss her.

I sighed wistfully at the memories wishing I could at least see her again if not talk to her. She had thus far, managed to avoid being in the same room with me despite the fact that she was a fukutaicho and I was a Taicho. She avoided the 5th Division like the plague and she had immersed herself in work, rarely going out to paint the town red with Matsumoto. The few times she had, Ikkaku had walked ahead of the rest of the group and checked every restaurant and bar for my presence. But they couldn't possibly do this forever.

The wedding. Yes, I would see her at the wedding.

-----------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------

"Dirty, rotten, hair-clip sporting, BASTARD!" I screamed as I sped through the last yards of the grueling 5-mile track I had just put myself through. Yes, I was running again. The pansy-ass _Kuchiki-hime _(as Zaraki liked to call him) had dropped an A-bomb on me and I panicked and now I was running.

Roxy looked at me, keeping a wary distance as I had been sparking uncontrollably. "I'm sorry, girl." I said stretching out a hand to her and she approached me, visibly happier that I was not losing my mind. Not just yet anyway. "Sorry Roxy. I'm driving myself nuts for no reason aren't I?"

She chuffed in agreement. "Do you have to be so brutally honest all the time? Can't you just lie to me once in a while?" I said straightening to walk over to the lazy brook I had been running along. The summer heat had nearly reduced it to a pathetic trickle, but the water was cool and refreshing. Roxy plunged in wholeheartedly, happy that we were done with the run. Now all she wanted to do was frolic in the cool water and I let her.

"Intends to talk to you." I grumbled, imitating Byakuya's dead monotone. "What the fuck is there to talk about anyway?"

Roxy was far too busy to answer and I was left to ponder the situation alone. It was inevitable, and I had known it all along. I had quite willingly donned a pair of blinkers when I came back to Sereitei and pretended I didn't see the insane lengths everyone around me was going to, to keep me out of Kurosaki's way. Hisagi had gone as far as sending me out on ridiculous training exercises every time there was a captain's meeting that required my presence, choosing to take the 3rd seat instead of me. I argued and insisted that I was all right; Kurosaki was no reason to get into Yamamoto's bad books (which he no doubt scorched on a regular basis!). But deep down inside I was relieved and more than a little grateful. I didn't want to see him and be reminded of his _orangeness_ again. I just couldn't deal with it.

"_Are you still angry and resentful?" Asked Inadzuma helpfully. _

"No… I don't think so."

"_Then what do you fear?"_

"I feel like an idiot when I think about him."

"_Only when you think of him?"_

"Inadzuma…"

"_I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. I'll bring that up later. For now let us talk about the ever orange Kurosaki."_

"Please Inadzuma. I'm suffering enough without your taunts."

"_What is bothering you kiddo?" He asked, his tone serious. _

"I don't know… But the idea of seeing him again. Scares me a little bit."

"_What about meeting him frightens you?"_

"Well I still think about him… a lot. You know that…"

"_Yes, I do. It's difficult to overlook or forget considering how much I dislike the color orange…"_

"Inadzuma!"

"_I'm sorry, I apologize. Do continue…"_

"Yes, so as I was saying what if I see him and discover that I still… I haven't stopped…"

"_Loving him." He finished for me._

"Yes." I murmured. "Precisely."

"_You have to find out sometime and the sooner the better, kiddo. There's no point living in doubt."_

I said nothing, and withdrew into our world. I needed a little cloudiness. Inadzuma wasn't one for displays of affection, but I guess I must have looked particularly needy for I soon felt his arms wrap around me from behind. He drew me into a surprisingly soft embrace and rested his chin on my head.

"You smell like rain Inadzuma."

"_Do you like it? It's all the rage this season in the elite zanpaktou circles…"_

"I take it back."

"_Too late, kiddo."_

-----------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------

She was on the patio when I found her, strumming on her guitar, singing softly. Roxy noticed my arrival and rose to greet me.

"Hey my kawaii Roxy!" I said, burying my hands in her soft fur.

"Oh, hey Ran!" called Haya a little distracted.

"Busy?"

"Sorta…Hisagi picked a few songs to do at the after-_after-_party."

"The what?" I asked, settling down beside her on a cushion.

"That's what I said! What the hell is an after-_after-_party anyway? Well according to Hisagi, it's the party that happens after the reception when only the close friends and family are around, and it continues until everyone is drunk blind."

"Isn't everyone drunk blind by the end of the reception?"

"_That's_ what I said! But he thinks otherwise. Suits me fine, 'cause then we may not end up doing any singing anyway." She put aside her guitar.

"What? No! We love the singing and it's been ages since we partied like that!"

"Two years, 5 months and 18 days." She said, getting up to head to the kitchen. "Want something to drink? Sake, beer, wine, juice?"

"Sake obviously. But what was that count about?" I called after her.

"If we do the singing gala at the after-_after_-party, then it will have been that long since that last time I went drinking with the whole gang and sang until we were hoarse." She saw my worried expression and quickly added, "I didn't count, Shunsui did."

"Ah. You had me worried there for a second. Ooh! Arigato!" I said taking the cup of warm sake from her.

She raised her beer and said, "To shorter interludes between bouts of drunken revelry."

"And the hope that we stay sober until the after-_after-_party!" I added.

She laughed and sipped her beer slowly. She gazed out into the wilderness that was her backyard and was soon lost in thought.

"Are you going to be alright?" I asked, peering at her over my cup of sake.

"Hmm? Oh… yeah. I'll be fine." She said with a dismissive wave and picked up her beer.

"You sure? He'll be there you know."

"I know and I'm fine with that. You guys are the ones who are paranoid about this whole thing and you're blowing it way out of proportion. I'm fine, it'll be alright." She said confidently, but the stoop in her shoulders belied her dread.

"Haya… talk to me." She looked up and seemed ready with another 'I'm fine' retort, so I cut in before she could say anything. "Talk to _me._ Not the motley crew, not the whole gang, just me."

She sighed and sunk into the cushions. "I wanna see him, but I don't wanna see him. I'm looking forward to seeing him, but I'm dreading it at the same time." She shook her head and looked up at me. "I don't know Ran, it's all a little confusing right now. I feel like I should get it over with. Meet him, talk to him and just be done with it. Then we can both go our own ways without this insane hide and seek situation we have going on."

I moved to a cushion near her and she leaned her head on my shoulder. "I know I'm being an idiot when I say this and please don't yell… but the truth is I don't know how I feel about him, I don't know if I'm… _over_ him."

"I know that and I'm not gonna yell. Been there, done that remember?" I was talking about Gin and she nodded slowly.

"Why is it always the bastards? Why is it so impossible to fall for a regular guy, who's not a conceited ass and doesn't treat a girl like crap?" She said exasperatedly.

"Because my kawaii Haya," I snaked an arm around her shoulder and drew her closer. "Those guys are so awfully boring, in and out of the sack."

"Which boring guy did you sleep with?"

"Shut up Haya. I know what I'm talking about."

"This better not be some Cosmo say so..."

"Haya, I _know_ what I'm talking about!"

-----------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------

For the love of GOD ppl please REVIEW!!!! :( I will cry y'know! I really will! Don't think i'm not capable of turning on the waterworks!!!

And music..... how about save Dave Matthews? I think this calls for some Dave Matthews. So let's try Save Me, Where Are U Going and ......... The Dreaming Tree.


	13. Chapter 13

Ok so I think it's time for a little Ichigo Haya LOOOVVVEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is the Mush alert.

Since its soo long after the war and all that, I've paired Kyouraku and Nanao. For the purposes of my story, i've even married them to each other. I think they're a cute pair. :)

And..................................... Yes Thats about it. I still dont own Bleach, Haya is my only creation and without the others, she isnt worth a cent!

:: Haya throws shoe at author ::

Correction, she means the world to me.

-----------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------

**Chapter 13: Sparks**

I awoke startled. I awoke dreaming of the deepest blue eyes I had ever seen, the color of the ocean under a pale inscrutable moon, flecked with stardust. I awoke dreaming of those eyes turning to look directly into mine. I awoke feeling my breath hitch in my throat.

I clumsily stumbled out of bed, my heart still racing and my palms sweating. I shook my head to clear it off its morning fuzziness but it did nothing other than emphasis the fact that I had gotten almost no rest at all. What the hell was wrong with me? There were things to do, a division to run. There was no time to dilly-dally over a strange 'electric' girl with beautiful eyes. I did not have the luxury to dwell on her sultry lips and that sassy mouth that made me want to…. What the HECK was wrong with me!

I dressed hurriedly, almost frenzied in my haste to find something to distract me. I refused to cave in to this passing obsession. Yes, that's what it was - a passing obsession. I needed to get some fresh air and then get on with the day. I left for the division immediately, arriving before anyone else and attacked the piling sheets of paper on my desk with a vengeance.

The tedious repetitive forms did little to take my mind off the girl. Haya, Madarame Haya. Odd Haya. That's what she was, she was odd.

"Are you all right Taicho?" Asked Momo drawing me gratefully back to reality.

"Uh… yes Momo. Why?"

"You were… almost… smiling." She said hesitantly, more a question than a statement.

"No I wasn't. Did you want something?" I asked gruffly.

"Hai Taicho. Orihime-san sent you something. It just arrived."

I smiled at the thought, but looked at the package with dread. Knowing Inoue it was bound to be some horrid combination of flavors that no person should ever think up, let alone force down someone else's throat. Kami alone knows how Ishida manages with that woman.

"Arigato Momo. I'll look at it when I get home." I said and turned my attention to my papers once more. Or was I merely waiting for her to leave so I could go back to obsessing about the girl?

'You're just curious.' I told myself. 'You're curious and you need to get it out of your system. So go see her again, talk to her this time and then you'll be able to get it out of your system.'

Sounded like a plan. I smiled at my brilliance and congratulated myself for being such a levelheaded Taicho in the Gotei.

"Um… Taicho?"

"Yes Momo?"

"You're doing it again…" she was starting to look worried now and I was starting to get exasperated.

"Momo… is there something you need?" I asked putting my brush aside to deal with my bubbly fukutaicho.

"Today is Nanao-san and Kyouraku Taicho's anniversary and there's going to be a party and…" she continued to drone on about how lovely it was going to be and I realized that this was the perfect opportunity to meet this girl.

"Fine Momo. Just leave the details on my desk. I'll look at it when I leave here this evening." I said and once more patted myself on the back. I was going to nip this in the bud, I was going to wake up to peaceful mornings once more and I was going to go back to being a fully functional Taicho.

-----------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------

"Finally!" Rukia said rolling her eyes at me, "Where have you been? The party got started ages ago!"

"Well I wasn't going to leave without finishing up at the division Rukia. And Kyouraku's not going anywhere anytime soon." I said pointing to the flamboyant Taicho who was making toast after toast to his wife who was blushing furiously, "He's just getting started."

"Rukia! I did it!" Exclaimed Renji running towards us. "I did it!" He said picking up Rukia and kissing her.

"Renji! Baka! What are you doing? Nii-sama might be here somewhere!" Rukia clobbered him over the head and he dropped her suddenly looking around for the 6th division head.

"Is he here?" He was suddenly looking nervous and I laughed lightly before informing him that Byakuya had no intention of coming. He visibly relaxed and smiled at Rukia sheepishly.

"Baka, what did you do?" Rukia demanded angrily. "You came running here to tell me something."

"Hai! Haya and Hisagi agreed to kick start things soon." Renji said puffing his chest out, "I convinced them to."

"You?" asked Rukia looking unconvinced. "How?"

"I told Haya that Kyouraku would like it. Y'know, like an anniversary present." Renji explained.

"Sounds like Rangiku's idea to me." She said crossing her arms and narrowing her eyes.

"Rukia how could you say something like that! It was my idea!" exclaimed Renji.

"Kick start what?" I asked, interrupting the two.

"Ah Ichigo, you hardly ever come out with the gang." Rukia said shaking her head at him. "Haya plays the guitar and _somehow_ she found out that Hisagi does too and so a few times when everyone is very, very drunk they play a little."

"A little?" Renji scoffed. "They play a lot! Haya sings too. She doesn't like to but she's pretty good."

"Do I hear someone complimenting Haya-chan?" Asked Yumichika smiling as sauntered over to us.

"Uh… yeah just telling Ichigo what he's been missing out on." Renji said, exuberant and proud of himself for whatever it was he thought he had achieved.

"Come Ichigo. Tonight's gonna be quite a memorable night. Haya rarely agrees to bring out the guitars before everyone's thoroughly drunk but she's making an exception for Kyouraku and Nanao."

Guitars? Singing? This was not going according to plan! I needed to talk to the girl, not see her sing! But maybe she would be terrible, I thought consoling myself. Hadn't Yumichika said she prefers to sing when everyone's drunk? Of course! She was a complete hack. And since when does Hisagi play the guitar anyway!

I spied the vexing object of my dreams talking to Ukitake. She was listening intently to him and her face slowly broke into a small lazy smile. I noticed that the left side of her lips tended to quirk before her right. The dark eyes didn't show as many speckles, and the hardness in her eyes seemed to soften a little as she talked with Ukitake. How long had she known Ukitake? I wondered.

"Ichigo-san!" He waved me over when he saw me watching them, "How have you been Ichigo-san? You seem to have buried yourself in work."

"I've been dealing with quite the mess Ukitake-san." I answered Ukitake, but my eyes were on the girl. "First they couldn't transfer out of the 5th fast enough, but now, quite suddenly they just can't seem to get back in fast enough."

Ukitake laughed politely, but noticed that I wasn't quite interested in his reaction. "Have you met Haya?" He asked when he saw me staring.

"Yes Juushiro-san, we've met before." She said looking away from me, "He stopped by the training grounds once." She turned her dark eyes to me once more before continuing, "He pointed out some very obvious flaws in my strategy."

"Is that so Haya-san?" Ukitake said, "You are indeed lucky to have so many good instructors. Ichigo-san here is…"

"The one who fought Aizen and the only one my Taicho ever wants to fight." She finished for Ukitake. Her lips pulled into a small smile and she raised her dark eyes to meet mine, "I have heard all the… legends."

"Surely it hasn't been long enough to turn the facts into legends Haya-san?" I asked softly and wondered briefly why it was that I couldn't seem to hear anything other than her soft voice.

"But the stories are so fantastic that I am compelled to call them legends." She replied smoothly. "It is the stuff that really good bedtime stories are made of."

"Bedtime stories Haya-san?"

"Hai Kurosaki Taicho. First Aizen tries to have Rukia killed, then Inoue-san is kidnapped, and then you went after her to rescue her from the bad, evil villain of the story. You then defeated him before returning with the girl…. It is the stuff of legends and bedtime stories Kurosaki Taicho, but I prefer to call it a legend, because bedtime story makes it sound trivial and it is anything but. Don't you agree Kurosaki Taicho?" She asked.

"But I didn't marry the girl, there was no happy ending." I pointed out.

"There was a happy ending, but just not for you. And I did say legend Kurosaki Taicho, not fairy tale. Besides, incomplete legends are all the more… fascinating." She said softly, while studying me with her dark bewitching eyes.

I couldn't possibly respond. Ukitake laughed lightly and came to my rescue, "I apologize Ichigo-san. I should have warned you about Haya-san's knack for the most beguiling arguments. It is nearly impossible to win an argument with her."

"So I see…" I murmured and I saw her lips twitch once more into a little smile. I wished she would smile a little more. I wished I could hear her laugh.

"Haya-chan!" Hollered Rangiku from across the room. "We're ready! Ooh! Ichigo!" She waved to me and I responded with a small nod and a smile.

"Please excuse me Kurosaki Taicho." She said softly, bowing her head, "My manipulative drunken friends are forcing me to embarrass myself far earlier than I would have preferred to."

"Please call me Ichigo," I said, "I'm not one for formal addresses. You can save that for Byakuya."

She paused for a moment and she appeared to be studying me before she finally answered me, "Hai Ichigo-sama…"

"Just Ichigo."

"I couldn't Ichigo-dono. It wouldn't be right, we've just met." She said and nodded to me again. "Jushiro-san, I'll catch up with you later."

"Hai Haya-san." He replied and smiled kindly down at the girl. She walked slowly through the crowd headed to where Rangiku was, nodding at people she recognized along the way.

"This is your first time, isn't it?" Ukitake asked looking at me.

"Huh?"

"The singing gala. You haven't seen one of these before have you?"

"Uh… no. Renji was telling me about it earlier…"

He nodded slowly with an inscrutable smile and sipped at his sake.

"Hey everybody!" I heard the girl's voice call out to everyone, "Before we get started could you guys please throw back a couple of cups of sake?"

Laughter erupted through the crowd with a couple of hoots and some comments, "you're not gonna get us drunk this time Haya", "two cups wouldn't do, Haya".

She smiled softly and rolled her eyes. She was seated in a chair beside Hisagi and she turned to talk to him softly, hefting her own guitar onto her lap. "Ok this first one is a mushy one. Just seemed kinda perfect considering the couple. Those of you who know this please sing along, you know I hate doing this by myself."

More shouts and comments went up from the table closest to her. "If you don't sing along I won't do anymore." She threatened smiling softly at them. She shook her head softly at the hoots that came in reply to her comment and turned her attention to her guitar.

The room soon became silent as the two began to play and I realized that the two were clearly good musicians.

"_Give me the song and I'll sing it like I mean it,_

_Give me the words and I'll say them like I mean it,_

'_Cause you've got my heart in a headlock, _

_You stopped the blood and made my head soft,_

_And god knows, you've got me sewn."_

I sat there mesmerized and realized that my brilliant plan had just exploded in my face. I would never wake up to peaceful mornings, in fact there was a good chance that I would never sleep again! And I most certainly was not going to be fully functional any time soon. She was stunning on a bad day, but the music encased her in a beauty that could only be described as ethereal. Her shoulders relaxed, her head inclined, the smile on her lips just a little wider, and her soft, luscious lips moving to form the words that spilled out on the wings of her sultry voice.

Ukitake was saying something. Why was he saying anything? Why wasn't he paying attention!

"I'm sorry Ukitake-san…."

"Hard to believe it's the same person, isn't it?" Ukitake asked giving me a knowing smile.

"Uh… yes. A little hard." I murmured.

The crowd had sung along for a while, but now hushed again as she sang another verse.

"_Danny boy! Don't be afraid to shake that ass and misbehave,_

_Danny boy! I know you got time, but what are you waiting for?_

_Anyway, the dust may just blow away if you wait for a windy day, _

_But you may find the chance has passed you by._

_I can't do the walk, I can't do the talk,_

_I can't be your friend unless I pretend,_

_So give me the song and I'll sing it like I mean it, _

_Give me the words and I'll say them like I mean it, _

'_Cause you've got my heart in a head lock, you stopped the blood and made my head soft,_

_And god knows, you've got me sewn!"_

Kyouraku was grinning at Nanao and I realized how apt the words were for the two.

"She knows how to pick them." I said softly.

"That she does." Ukitake said chuckling softly.

The duo finished to applause and cheers and they bowed their heads in acknowledgement.

"Ok, this is one I know all of you know, so you better sing along." She said before starting up again.

"_What would you think if I sang out of tune,_

_Would you stand up and walk out on me?_

_Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song,_

_And I'll try not to sing out of key._

_I get by with a little help from my friends,_

_I get high with a little help from my friends,_

_Going to try with a little help from my friends." _

The drunken group did sing along and although her voice carried clear and true I wished they wouldn't. I sipped nervously on my sake and continued to watch her. I saw Renji trying to catch my eye and I raised an eyebrow. He flashed his 'I told you so' grin and I nodded back at him absentmindedly.

The evening continued in a blur of dark enthralling eyes, beguiling lips that were begging to be nibbled on and soft, sultry tones that left me weak in the knees.

"All right everyone, last one for the night." She said to the drunken, noisy and protesting crowd, snapping me out of my trance in the process. "No, really. I can't sing anymore. I'm beat." She waved her hand tiredly at the protests.

"This last one is one that I found to be absolutely perfect for Shunsui-san. You'll see when you hear the lyrics. The words are pretty straight forward so please join in."

"_Tonight we drink to youth, and hold on fast to truth,_

_Don't wanna lose what I had as a boy._

_My heart still has a beat, but love is now a feat,_

_As common as a cold day in LA._

_Sometimes when I'm alone I wonder, _

_Is there a spell that I am under?_

_Keeping me from seeing the real thing?_

_Love hurts, but sometimes it's a good hurt,_

_And it feels like I'm alive._

_Love sings, when it transcends the bad things,_

_Have a heart and try me,_

'_Cause without love I won't survive."_

She smiled pointedly at Kyouraku as she sang the last few lines and laughter erupted around the married couple. Please don't stop, I begged silently. Please don't…

But she did and I _tasted_ the disappointment as she set aside her guitar and reached for her drink. Her eyes suddenly found mine and she seemed surprised to see me. She slowly raised her glass to me and I responded to the toast, sipping on my sake, watching her watch me. She slowly turned away with an unreadable smile and I longed more than ever to hear her laugh.

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Ok so the songs are Sewn by The Feeling

A little help from my friends by the Beatles and it's been covered by a whole load of artists. I like the Wet Wet Wet version so u might wanna check that out.

And the last one was Love Hurts by Incubus. FanTABulous song!!!

So pls tell me what you think of Ichigo's downward spiral into an addiction called Haya! :) LOL


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: I dont know anything other than my OC Haya.

Ok this is a slightly serious chapter. It will be followed by lighter stuff, but I need this for my later plot line so bear with me. I'm sketchy on the details but it will be filled in later chapters.

Suggested music....... try I will possess your heart by Death Cab for Cutie. It's a dark gloomy song........

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**Chapter 14: Skeletons**

I was being followed. I could feel it in the itch between my shoulder blades, and the cold, dark irrational fear that made the hair on my neck stand on end. I was being followed. But the monsters in the shadows remained hidden no matter how hard I looked for them, refusing to show themselves, contented with jeering their threats at me. I hurried, I rushed, I ran. But that's the thing about monsters, they are impossible to outrun. Lamp posts and trees rushed past me in a blur as I tried to escape, but they found me as I had known they would. In a horrifying rush of blinding lights, screeching tires and scrunching metal I came to a halt, the world askew, tinted a shade of red, smelling like blood. I tried to move but found that I couldn't and I panicked. Kami, where was I?

The adrenaline rushed through me as I tried to fight my immobility. Surely it was temporary! It had to be! I was in shock, the impact had stunned me. I had to move! I had to MOVE!

I thrashed awake, my eyes suddenly flying open, my body assaulted by the nerve wracking pain of muscles tightening around bones that could no longer articulate. My head pounded with a headache so intense that it felt like a little woodpecker was trying to make its way out of my skull. I scrunched my eyes shut to keep out the lights. But I had to move, I willed my body to move and I struggled weakly, until a scream wrenched itself from my throat. But all it sounded like a soft gasp.

"Haya…" someone called to me but the voice was too soft to recognize, too far away…

I tried to open my eyes once more, but found that I no longer had the strength or the will to risk the pain from earlier. I struggled to breathe, my chest felt constricted and I began to panic once more. Where was I? How did I get here?

The sterilized smell of a hospital assaulted my senses, leaving me nauseated and gasping for air. The pressure in my chest grew until I was screaming soundlessly in pain, but nothing would abate the pain or bring air into my lungs.

"She's waking up!" Squeaked a woman.

Hands struggled to hold me down onto the bed as I thrashed around in panic. Why was I in a hospital?

"Let go!" I wanted to scream, but I lacked the strength for it. I struggled wanly against the arms that held me down.

"She's ripped the stitches on her side again!" Griped a man. "Hold her down dammit! Where's the sedative?"

"No!" I screamed but all that came out was a faint gasp. A faint pinprick and the darkness began to creep in again. The terrifying blackness from which I was certain I would never escape.

"Haya!" Called the voice from earlier, but he was further away than before and I knew he wouldn't find me in time.

"Please… finish it. " I pleaded. "Please end this… kill me."

Silence was my only answer, a deepening brooding silence. I was beginning to drift into unconsciousness once more and I struggled against it, fighting it with all I had. I didn't care to drift in and out of the pain anymore. I wanted it to end once and for all. I wanted to be free of it all… I just wanted to be free….

I awoke again, perhaps hours or even days later, I had no way of knowing. People were talking around me again and I recognized the man who kept calling out to me.

"Do something, damn it!" He demanded angrily.

"You can't let her die!" Pleaded another.

"Please save her Taicho." Said the voice I recognized from earlier. "She's… she's one of us."

And they were fading once more. "No…" I called out weakly, "Don't go…"

Don't leave me here alone, I pleaded silently. Don't leave me here after giving me glimmer of hope. Why did you come if all you were going to do is leave me here!

I wanted to scream in my rage! I wanted to call out to them and beg them not to leave! But I wasn't strong enough…. The voices retreated and the darkness claimed me once more. Perhaps this time I wouldn't wake up. I hoped, I prayed that I wouldn't wake up to this nightmare again.

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"You're disappointing Gaki." Zaraki growled, taunting her once more. "I had thought I would get a fight and yet I find that you are nothing more than a weakling."

The clock on the fight stood at 55 minutes. This young girl was anything but weak and I burned with anger. I knew what Zaraki was doing. He was taunting her because there was a latent strength in her that needed to find it's way to the surface and anger was one of the easiest and most effective ways to get there. I certainly knew that better than anyone else, but it _still_ didn't make it any easier to watch. This exam for a promotion had gone on long enough. She had proved herself a strong fighter, what more did he want?

'_He wants her to find her strength'_, murmured Zangetsu. _'Just as I did with you.'_

"You're as pathetic as on the day I found you Gaki!" He spat at her once more as she staggered to her feet. "I should have left you in Rukongai to rot. You are worth nothing more than the drunk perverts that tried to get in your pants."

"Am not." She growled and I saw her reiatsu grow into a crackling shroud, her instrument of defense as well as offence. This was so much more than the 'party tricks' we had seen at the training grounds. I wished Byakuya could have seen this; I would have loved to see him eat his words.

The speckles in her eyes were growing and her irises were almost completely engulfed by them. The scars on her face were glowing a soft red and I held my breath in anticipation of her attack. Zaraki was pushing her buttons and he was getting a reaction.

She lunged at him again, her attack faster and stronger than before. Zaraki grinned and I knew he was pleased but he continued to disdainfully mock the girl, "Are you still the weak little girl that needed to be rescued in Rukongai?"

"I did not need to be rescued in Rukongai!" she shrieked baring her teeth in a manic snarl. "I didn't need you, I was strong then and I AM STRONG NOW!"

"Ha!" he jeered, "Look at you Gaki, you can barely move. I am barely getting started and you are already done. Is this all you are? A scarred helpless freak?"

"I am not helpless." She growled back. "I REFUSE to be helpless!"

Her scars began to bleed as the fight continued. Every attack brought forth a stronger trickle and her reiatsu also began to spike uncontrollably. I wondered if Zaraki knew what he was doing and stood up in trepidation.

"I will NEVER be helpless again!" She shrieked and charged at Zaraki with renewed vigor. Her reiatsu was now strong enough to burn Zaraki. His captain's haori and shihakusho had been singed long ago, but now the exposed parts of his chest and arms were also starting to show burns.

"Ikkaku," I called softly and turned to see that he was equally worried. He shook his head, "Taicho knows what he's doing." But he didn't sound as certain as his words and I stood back. I did not belong in this Division and I had no right to intervene.

"You're weak Gaki." Zaraki reiterated. "As weak and helpless as they come. Pathetic."

And she exploded. The reiatsu erupted outwards from her form in a blinding sphere of the light and I raised a hand defensively before my face. I shielded my eyes and I could see that she was bleeding profusely from the scars on her face. Her shihakusho was reduced to shreds and barely stayed on her shoulders. She was bleeding profusely, but Zaraki had not inflicted these new injuries on her.

Her body went taut suddenly and she threw her head back, emitting a painful shriek.

"We need Unohana." I told Ikkaku and he nodded before leaving the arena quickly.

The girl dropped to her knees and was gasping for air. "I am not weak." She growled again. "I will KILL you if you try to touch me!" She pointed one of her short, pronged swords at Zaraki who was studying her warily.

"Go on. Try it." She taunted in a soft, growl. "Come at me." She dared him again.

But before he could move she was on him again in a blitz. Her reiatsu sparked strong and wild and made some of the unseated members of the 11th cringe under its pressure. Where was this strength coming from and at what cost, I wondered as I gazed at the rivulets of blood streaming down her face.

The fight had stepped onto a new level now. Zaraki was forced to defend more under the repeated, relentless attacks of the girl. Her lips were curled back in a grin almost as deranged as her captain's and I watched with a growing sense of dread. This was not going to end well.

Her zanpaktous began to glow and I knew what was coming - another searing bolt of lightning. The sparking charge of electricity caught Zaraki in his shoulder sending him reeling backwards. She threw her head back and let loose a manic laugh, "Who were you calling a weakling old man?" She turned to face him once more, "Who's the weak one now?"

Her reiatsu suddenly spiked once more, moving outwards away from her body in a rippling, devastating surge. She shrieked in pain, and almost fell to her knees. She dug the tip of one of her swords into the ground to keep from falling, but stayed doubled over.

Unohana arrived with Ikkaku and she looked on in trepidation at the sight before her.

"Zaraki Taicho, you have to stop this right now!" Unohana demanded. "She is no condition to fight any longer."

Zaraki shrugged. "She won't stop attacking."

"Haya!" Called Ikkaku to the girl. "You need to get your reiatsu under control."

"Don't come near me, you bald twerp." She warned in a low, guttural growl. "Don't you dare try to touch me."

"Ikkaku-san, she is losing control. Don't be offended by her words at the moment." Unohana said, pulling out a small vial from her robes. "I don't like doing this, but we have no choice."

She stepped towards the girl, but was stopped by the crackling shroud that still surrounded her. She was weakening and was gasping for air but her reiatsu was still strong enough to incinerate anything that it touched.

"Haya-san, please listen to me. I need to heal your injuries." Unohana said, trying to reason with the girl, who merely shook her head.

"Haya!" Called Ikkaku again, "You have to let us help you!"

She fell forward slowly onto her knees but held a warning hand up towards Unohana. "Don't… I can't control it." She whispered sounding a little bit more like herself.

"Haya, please!" Pleaded Ikkaku. "Reign in your reiatsu."

She shook her head weakly and fell forward onto the ground, but her reiatsu did not subside. Instead, it grew stronger and they were forced to back away from her again.

"What do you need to do with that vial?" Asked Zaraki softly.

-----------------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------

She was still unconscious and she was still bleeding. And she continued to toss and turn while trapped in nightmares that I did not know or understand. I was incapable of helping her and I wanted to scream in frustration.

"Haya, please wake up." I pleaded over and over again until I was hoarse. "Please open your eyes. Come back to us."

Yachiru was inconsolable and had screeched at Unohana Taicho in anger, demanding that she do something.

"You can't let her die Braid-chan!" She had screamed, "You just CAN'T. She's our friend! She's my nakama and Pachinko-chan's imouto! SHE CAN'T DIE!"

Yumichika looked on in silence. He glanced at me and I saw the worry I was feeling mirrored in his face. There was nothing to say and we waited in silence.

Zaraki had been furious. He was furious that Unohana Taicho could do nothing more, he was furious that he could do nothing either and I knew he was furious for letting this happen. He was covered in burns from wading through her reiatsu to get to her. He had used his own reiatsu to suppress hers long enough for Unohana to sedate her, and now here she lay, comatose.

The mysterious scars continued to bleed, but it had lessened slightly since the night of the fight. Unohana could not explain it. Neither would the bleeding stop, nor would the wounds respond to any form of kido. They had finally sutured the wounds shut, but the blood continued to seep through the bandages in unabating rivulets of crimson. All we could do was be grateful for the fact that it had reduced a little and hope that it was a good sign and not an indication of her impending death.

"Haya, please wake up." I called out again, as the silence bore on, each dreadful second growing into minutes, hours and days.

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"This is most interesting." Kurotsuchi said, his eyes shinning with curiosity. "Most interesting indeed. She was reborn with the scars, you say? And now they won't stop bleeding. Most interesting…"

"Tell us what you know about it Kurotsuchi." I demanded impatiently. Haya was slipping further with each moment that passed by and the lunatic captain of the 12th was unwilling to share any information with us.

"I will need to examine the girl. You should bring her here…" he began again, after pausing to glare at me.

"She is not going to be moved from the 4th Division." Zaraki growled. "You will help her Kurotsuchi and you WILL tell me what you know." He advanced towards the gaudy captain who waved away Zaraki's threats.

"Kill me and you will get no answers Zaraki." He grinned in delight. "I don't know everything, but I have my suspicions."

"Which are?" Demanded Byakuya in his cold, authoritative voice. "The Soutaicho is on his way here Kurotsuchi, there is no point delaying this any longer. The girl is not to be touched and she is not going to be moved from the 4th Division. Now tell us what you know."

Kurotsuchi scowled in anger and scoffed at the three captains standing before him. "Fine. I believe her strange reiatsu is connected somehow with her life in the living world, in particular with the manner in which she died. Nemu, where are you, you stupid whore! Bring up the information we gathered from the living world on the subject."

"She is not a SUBJECT!" Zaraki thundered, grabbing Kurotsuchi by the lapels of his haori. "Her name is Madarame Haya."

"Zaraki Taicho." I called to the enraged giant, "You can beat him to a pulp later. Let's hear what he has to say. We need this to help Haya."

The mention of the girl's name seemed to calm him a little and he let go of the scientist. Nemu drew our attention to a series of pictures and newspaper articles on the wide screens.

"She was the victim of a hit and run accident. That's how she died." She said softly.

I gasped as I took in the information, staring at the newspaper article in horrified silence. She had been run off the road by a large truck of some sort, and nearly killed in the accident. All that remained of her car was a mangled hunk of metal and I wondered how she had survived at all. Then came the list of her injuries she had suffered; a hairline fracture of the skull, 3 broken ribs, a collapsed lung, a crushed hip and finally, a ruptured liver caused by a large sliver of metal that ripped her side open from rip to hip. The windshield had shattered at some point, the shards scarring her face, leaving her entirely unrecognizable. She was as good as dead, the extensive damage to her liver ensured that, but it was a good painful 5 weeks before she finally succumbed to her injuries. She had not been reported missing until after her death, a loner in life a loner in death. The case remains open, the trail cold and dead.

"She was pleading for death." I gasped, a vice like coldness constricting my chest.

"I beg your pardon?" Byakuya asked, his voice a soft raspy whisper.

"When she was still conscious, while they were taking her to the 4th… she looked right at me and asked me to… kill her. She kept asking me to 'end it'…"

Kami Haya, what happened to you?

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Ikkaku had passed out from the strain and exhaustion and now lay slumped in a chair by her bed, head resting on a forearm, fingers still gripping Haya's in a desperate plea.

"Aniki…" Said a soft, hoarse voice. Her eyes fluttered open and she squinted at Ikkaku. She weakly tried to move her hand to wake him, and I hurriedly jabbed him in the ribs.

"She's awake." I said and he bolted upright in his chair, leaning forward to peer at Haya.

"Haya? Haya? Can you hear me?" He yelled in a wild panic.

She frowned weakly and squinted at him again. "I can hear you." She rasped. "… too loud."

I poured her a glass of water and she turned her eyes to me gratefully. She sipped a little before collapsing back on the pillows in exhaustion. "Who died?" She asked slowly, taking in the expressions on our faces.

"You almost did." Ikkaku answered softly, temporarily suspending his 'like I care' act.

She was quiet and thoughtful and I wondered how much she remembered. "Taicho?" She asked softly.

"Burned a little badly, but perfectly alright." I answered her. "I'll let them know you're awake. Yachiru has been here everyday…"

She smiled and nodded weakly. "I could hear her screaming at somebody…"

"Unohana Taicho." Ikkaku said softly. "She was screaming at Unohana Taicho."

"So were you." She said softly, gazing at Ikkaku. "Aniki, so were you."

Ikkaku smiled sheepishly, but the conversation had exhausted her and she closed her eyes once more. She was asleep again when I got back with Unohana Taicho, who said that she seemed better and it would not be long before she woke up again.

I dispatched a hell butterfly to Taicho and we settled down to wait for her to wake up once more.

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I stepped softly into the room. I didn't want to disturb any of the occupants. I smiled taking in the kawaii picture before me – Ikkaku sat propped against the metal headboard, one arm stretched along the beams, the other curled around Haya's shoulder, who was huddled against his side. I approached the siblings softly and peered over Ikkaku at Haya.

She opened her eyes and smiled softly at me, "Don't wake him." She smiled up at Ikkaku, who had his head throw back and was snoring softly. "He hasn't been home in days and refuses to get any sleep."

"How are you doing Sleeping Beauty?" I whispered.

She smiled at the nickname. "Not too shabby. Have you seen Taicho? He's been…."

"Yes. He's a little upset Haya." I explained and I saw her smile fade. "Not with you Haya. He blames himself for the accident. He'll come by when he's ready."

"Is that what it's being called?" she asked wryly, "'Accident'? Not the time 'Haya went berserk'?"

I waved aside her sarcasm. "How long has your kawaii aniki been here?" I asked.

"I don't think he ever left Ran." She looked up at Ikkaku, gratitude written all over her face. "Aniki…" she murmured softly.

She and Ikkaku were close; they argued and squabbled but sought out each other's company at the end of each day. Ikkaku tried to keep up his nonchalant act, but he was protective as everyone who tried to mess with her eventually found out. All of the 16 who had been put in the 4th had been allowed to heal before Ikkaku had sent them back there again.

"You mean a lot to them Haya." I said softly and she smiled weakly in response. "How much do you remember?" I asked bringing her out of her dark thoughts.

"I remember bits of the fight, I remember Taicho taunting me… I remember Unohana Taicho trying to reach me… I remember Ikkaku yelling at me to control my reiatsu…." She looked up at me sadly. "Taicho saved me, didn't he? I burned him with my reiatsu, didn't I?"

"He's not angry with you Haya. He was worried about you, they all were." I said softly and I saw a solitary tear move out of the corner of her eye. "I was worried about you."

She forced a strained smile, and pulled Ikkaku closer. He snorted in his sleep and tightened his grip on her shoulder. "While I was still asleep I could hear Yachiru screaming at Unohana Taicho." She said softly.

I smiled knowing there was more, waiting for her to continue. "I heard all of them actually." She said softly. "Yachiru said I was… their nakama."

She looked up at me, eyes glazing over with tears. "I have a name for us." She said smiling softly, "Motley crew."

I laughed softly, "What?"

"Yeah, 'cause we're all peculiar. A giant, a bald guy, a 'beautiful' metrosexual, a midget and… well me." She explained. "Motley crew."

I laughed softly and shook my head at Haya's rather apt term for the group. The strange quartet from the 11th Division had found this girl in Rukongai and somehow she had been sucked into the group. How it had all come to be was still a mystery. Yumichika would no doubt say that it was because 5 was a much more beautiful number than 4….

She seemed to be lost in thought, quietly watching her sleeping brother.

"Maybe I should go…" I rose to leave, but was interrupted by Haya.

"Stay. Please?" She asked softly. "Give me all the gossip I've missed out on… how long have I been out?"

"8 days." I told her with a smile and settled into the chair. If she wanted gossip, I would give her gossip. "Byakuya _almost_ caught Rukia and Renji in the act."

"No way!"

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"Hey Isane-san." I said as I sauntered into the 4th Division.

"Rangiku-san." She replied with her small smile. She glanced at Hisagi, who stood beside me and blushed lightly. "Hisagi-san. Here to see Haya-san I suppose?"

"Well that's what _I'm_ here for." I said, eyeing Hisagi. "I can't speak for anyone but myself."

Hisagi colored lightly but pretended not to hear me, and Isane stammered something about needed to check on a patient and hurried away.

"Hisagi you really should make your move sometime this century." I said as we walked towards Haya's room. "She isn't gonna wait for you forever."

"I don't know what you're talking about." He said and stalked down the hall beside me. I smiled and shook my head, but there would be time to meddle in Hisagi's love-life later on. Besides, it was something I needed Haya's help with, so for now, I would settle for concentrating my efforts on her.

Haya, on the other hand, seemed to be healing faster than anyone expected, and was doing it without anyone's urging either! She also had far more friends than I had previously imagined. Almost dying has a way of doing that I guess. The motley crew was an ever-present fixture and that didn't surprise anyone, but Rukia and Renji had begun to visit often as well and that did surprise a few. Kuchiki usually had a thing or two to say about Rukia's friends and she rarely ever hung out with the 11th Division – far too uncouth for Kuchiki-hime's noble sensibilities. But oddly enough, he had no problem with Rukia's friendship with Haya.

But the most surprising visitor of all was an orange-haired Taicho who couldn't seem to take his eyes off our endearing Haya. I nudged Hisagi and glanced in the direction of Kurosaki Ichigo.

He nodded slowly. "I see."

"As do I." I murmured and walked towards the group that were seated in the balcony of Haya's room. "And how is our dearest Haya doing today?" I said loudly, as I walked into the room.

"Well enough to make it all the way out here." Replied Haya with a smile, gesturing to the balcony they were seated in. She was looking better, certainly stronger, and the scars that had been swollen a painful red had subsided to mild welts. "Hey Hisagi." She said, to the Taicho beside me.

Hisagi smiled a soft greeting while I pulled Haya into a smothering hug. "Hey Sleeping Beauty."

"Hey Beauty." She said with a knowing smile and I hurried to change the topic.

"Has Unohana Taicho decided when you can leave yet?" I asked.

"She said tomorrow looks like a possibility." Ikkaku said proudly, pulling Haya a little closer. She smiled and leaned back against him, curling into the crook of his arm.

"He only wants me home 'cause he's had enough of Yumichika's cooking." She said looking up at Ikkaku.

"Haya it's worse than hospital food." Ikkaku said, blanching at the memory. "You bet I want you to come home!"

"Hmm," Haya said rubbing her chin thoughtfully. "I wonder what Yumichika would do if he heard you say that?"

"You wouldn't." Growled Ikkaku.

"Wouldn't I?" Countered Haya, with a develish grin.

I turned to watch the Taicho of the 5th. He had thus far, said nothing, and chose to hang back and watch Haya. His amber brown eyes were trained on Haya, almost as if there was no one else in the room and his perpetual frown had given way to a slightly startled look. What I'm trying to say is that he was drooling at her, gaping like he had never seen a woman before, but he looked rather cute doing it and that's the only reason I'm struggling with all these euphemisms.

"You guys should come." Haya said, drawing my attention away from the gawking Taicho. "To breakfast I mean." She looked at Rukia and Renji. "Will you two come? It'll be fun!"

"I… uh… I'm not sure Haya-san." Stammered Rukia.

"I doubt Kuchiki Byakuya would like that Haya." I said, helping Rukia out and she glanced at me gratefully. "Coming here to visit you and eating breakfast at the 11th are two entirely different things."

Haya nodded thoughtfully. "I hadn't thought of that… damn. But Renji, you can still come." She said looking up at the tattooed Taicho of the 3rd.

"His mornings are a little busy Haya." Said Ikkaku with a grin. "The mornings are spent either sneaking out of the Kuchiki mansion or sneaking Rukia back in."

Renji sputtered angrily and Rukia colored, while the rest of us laughed at their embarrassment. Kurosaki gasped at the sound of Haya's soft laughter and I was tempted to snap my fingers before his face, but there would be time to embarrass him later. I bide my time.

Haya winced a little and Ikkaku looked at her in concern. "I'm fine Aniki." She murmured trying not to draw the attention of the others as they squabbled. "It just… twinges a little when I laugh." She murmured softly, a hand pressed to her right side. Ikkaku didn't seem satisfied but nodded slowly anyway.

"How about you Kurosaki Taicho?" I said, loud enough to draw everyone's attention to him.

"Huh?" He muttered, as everyone turned to face him. "What?"

"Breakfast." Said Haya. "At the 11th. Would you like to come?"

He paused, unsure how to respond and glanced around the room uncertainly. "Would Zaraki be alright with this?" He asked softly, and glanced at Renji almost begging him for help.

"He doesn't mind." Said Haya, facing him with an openness that only seemed to make him more uncomfortable. She was completely unaware of his infatuation with her and seemed to think that his interest only lay in her strange reiatsu. Oh my clueless friend, her effort to ease his discomfort is only making it so much worse! I barely controlled my urge to laugh at the comical situation before me, and instead chose to make him squirm a little more.

"Are your mornings busy as well Kurosaki Taicho?" I asked, with a devious smile. "Ducking and hiding from lovers and their protective brothers?"

He choked and Haya laughed along with the others. "No my mornings are not … 'busy'." He muttered when he recovered from his surprise.

"Then you'll come?" Asked Haya once more, and I watched in amusement as he turned to face her.

"Yes." He murmured, oblivious to the others in the room. "I'll come."

"Good." Haya said with a small smile. She turned back to Ikkaku. "That makes… 8? Will Shunsui and Nanao come too? What about Juushiro-san?"

The discussion continued about the head count and the menu, but I wasn't really paying attention. I was watching Kurosaki Ichigo watch Madarame Haya. I smiled to myself. This was going to be interesting.  
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:D Yes, following chapters are gonna include Ichigo and all the insane things he does for the sake of his lady love. :)

But about this chapter.... I'm not too happy with the story being told from Haya's prespective. She's far too reticent a character to get really gushy about horrible stuff so I'm gonna try again in later chapters and try and use a different character. So if you hated it, pls let me know. I am trying to work on this stuff.

REVIEW PLS!!!! And 'thanks you's to all my readers and the Chocolate chips cookies to the ones who took the time to review. Thank you SOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!

(Hint: If you're wondering why you missed out on the cookies, it's cos you didnt review! HIT THAT BUTTON PPL!)


	15. Chapter 15A

So who wants to see a little more IchigoXHaya mush? Well ready or not, here it comes! Brace yourselves!!!! :D

So let's try a little funky music. How about a little Dandy Warhols? Yep, let's try Bohemian Like You by those guys and....... I Like The Way by BodyRockers.

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**C****hapter 15: Encounters – Innocent & Contrived**

"He likes you." Rangiku grinned happily at the prospect of more romantic gossip.

"Does not Ran, you're imagining things." I replied for the nth time that day.

"He so does." Concurred Yumichika and I groaned in dismay. This debate had been going on for a while now and I was growing more tired of it with every passing minute.

"Who does what?" asked Ikkaku, as he handed me a beer and sat down beside me.

"Aniki you don't wanna know!" I turned to glare at Rangiku and Yumichika. "I forbid you two from filling his ears with this bull shit!"

"What? Now I absolutely HAVE to know!" Ikkaku said, throwing an arm around my shoulders and pulling me closer. "C'mon Imouto, what could you possibly not tell me?"

"There is nothing to tell Ikka!" I exclaimed in frustration. "It's just the ranting of two lunatics!"

Yumichika pouted and crossed his arms with practiced grace, "We are so right about this. She just refuses to listen to reason."

"What are they talking about?" Ikkaku asked me again and I rolled my eyes wearily.

"You asked for it Ikka. Later don't say I didn't warn you." I took a long swig on my beer. "Now prepare yourself for the most nonsensical drivel you have ever heard in all your life!"

I pointed to the two lunatics who were seated across from Ikkaku and me and said, "They think that Kurosaki _likes_ me."

Ikkaku looked at me in confusion and I turned triumphantly to the two matchmakers. "Ha! See?"

"I thought you knew!" Exclaimed a surprised Ikkaku, which in turn, surprised me! Startled, baffled, stunned, utterly discombobulated and speechless… you get the picture?

"WHAT?" I screamed. "Not you too!"

"He follows you around Haya." Ikkaku said shrugging, "I'd say he likes you."

"He comes every morning for breakfast." Yumichika said and I opened my mouth to object but he silenced me with a raised finger. "Yes he likes the food, but I think he likes you more. He comes to _watch_ you while you're training and drools all over the bar when you play the guitar with Hisagi." He was using his fingers to list out on his 'evidence' and it infuriated me. "He _likes_ you."

I glared at Yumichika and turned to face my surrogate brother. "And _Aniki_ you're ok with this?" I asked sarcastically.

"Yeah, it's Ichigo." He said smiling at me, "Kami knows you could have done worse."

"Oh fuck, you're _all_ delusional morons!" I groaned and dropped my head into my hands.

"I don't see what the problem is," Rangiku waved a dismissive hand at me, "I know you voted for him in the 'hottest guy in Sereitei' poll so it's clear you think he's hot. Why not just go out with the guy?"

"Maybe because he hasn't asked me, which might be because HE DOESN'T LIKE ME!" I strode out of the bar angrily, refusing to answer the calls and shouts from the morons I had just left behind me.

Rangiku had come up with this theory a few weeks ago and it had progressively made life more difficult for me. It was true the guy was _everywhere_, but that didn't really mean anything. He scowled at me all the time, rarely talked to me and never ever had anything nice to say when he did! For all I knew he was trying to decide if I was Vizard material or not. The 'accident' had garnered a lot of unwanted attention and all of the Taicho had at some point in time or the other come to talk to me about it. All except Kurotsuchi, who Zaraki had threatened with irreversible bodily harm.

But the repeated efforts of Rangiku and Yumichika (and now Ikkaku!) to get me to 'see' that Kurosaki liked me had started to make things very awkward for me. I found myself watching him wondering if it were true. Rangiku's constant reminders of the 'hottest guy' poll made me wonder what was really there under all those layers of his uniform and captain's haori. One day I even found myself wondering what he might look like without that frown on his face. Almost lost my head in the process too, because I had been training with Ikkaku at the time.

All in all, it was a bad idea. Don't fall in love with men you cannot possibly get your hands on. Every girl knows that! Don't go after the legends, because no girl ever gets the legend. The girl he went to rescue from Heuco Mundo didn't get him, and if she couldn't, no one could. I stood a better chance of getting it on with Kuchiki!

I shook off the ridiculous ideas and decided I needed a calming run. A long run, a cool swim and then I needed to hit the sack and get some much-needed rest.

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'Where was she?' I wondered impatiently as I sat under my customary tree, head resting on a loosely clenched fist. She always trained here with Ikkaku in the evenings, so now where was she?

Why did this girl make me feel like a nervous boy all over again, I wondered. It's true I hadn't really been with anyone for a long time, but that was really no excuse! I didn't have the time or the inclination for a relationship at the moment. I thought I had been in love with Inoue when I went to save her in Hueco Mundo, but unexpectedly at the end of the war I found that I had no real feelings for the girl. She is no doubt beautiful and sweet, but lives in a self-contrived world within her own head and has some troubling preferences as far as food goes. Ishida seemed quite smitten and I had been more than happy to let the man have her. And ever since the move to Sereitei a little over a decade ago, there had just been the occasional hookups with women who _weren't_ Shinigami. Maybe 'occasional' was the wrong word. 'Infrequent', 'rare', 'once in a blue moon' was more like. All in all, it was a very short list and consisted only of non-Shinigami women because I did not need the added headache of being forced to deal with them after it was over.

So what the hell was it about this girl? She wasn't pretty in the textbook definition of the word, but she was stunning. And she was no weakling; she was strong, as a fighter and an individual. In short, she was _everything_ a non-Shinigami woman wasn't - beguiling, independent and fearless. Fearless - that was the word. She was not awed by anyone or anything (ask Byakuya, he'll tell you). The closest she had come to fearing anything had been the night of her fight with Zaraki, but she had faced her demons and came out on top. She had clawed her way out the nightmare back to the realm of the living. What hadn't killed her had made her stronger and I admired her for it.

Just a day after she woke up, I found her propped against the pillows answering questions from the Soutaicho as well as other captains. She politely greeted me when she saw me walk in and I wondered if she remembered gazing into my eyes and begging me to take her life. It was also the day I had seen her really smile and I had stood still, stunned for a few moments. Kami knows I had dreamt of seeing her smile but nothing compared with the real thing; her eyes had lit up and her lips pulled all the way into a full-blown delighted grin. When I finally did recover, I was relieved to see that it had had the same effect on everyone other than the 11th Division members.

But she didn't smile all the time. In fact, it was a rare occurrence that only happened around her close friends. And there was that husky laugh that sent shivers up my spine…. But that didn't happen around me either, so exactly what was I doing there? I was there because I was working up the courage to actually _say_ something to her. Every time she had found me lurking (yes lurking, I am not proud of it) around her while she trained, she had glanced at me with a slightly troubled look but had thus far, said nothing about it. She was outspoken like the rest of her friends in the 11th so I wondered how long the silence was going to continue.

"Is there some particular reason why you follow me around Kurosaki Taicho?" Asked a voice from behind me. And so the silence ends…

"What makes you think I'm following you Madarame?" Another side effect of the 'following' was that we had once more slipped into addressing each other formally. It was an extreme form of denial, which only served to emphasize the fact that _something_ was definitely going on.

"Only the fact that you're around here _everyday_, you come to breakfast everyday and I can sense you staring at me while we're at the bar." She answered evenly, hands crossed across her chest.

"You would like to rescind your offer of breakfast?" I asked, choosing to ignore all the other accusations.

"No." Her eyes narrowed as she studied me, "I want to know why you come."

"I come because you invited me and I miss bacon and coffee from my time in the living world."

She nodded slowly digesting this information. "And why do you come here everyday?" Damn, I thought I'd gotten away.

"Why do you think I come here?" I asked like an idiotic boy who can't bring himself to admit that he likes a girl.

"Well there's this ridiculous theory that everyone's latched onto and I wanna prove it's not true, so if you could Kurosaki Taicho, please answer my question first." She said smoothly, still studying me with those unfathomable eyes, lips pulled into a slight pout of annoyance, lips that I would so have loved to taste…

"Kurosaki Taicho?" She snapped curtly, an eyebrow raised.

"Huh? What's the ridiculous theory?"

"I'd rather not say… but I assure you it _is_ truly ridiculous. I will tell you after you give me your reasons and we can laugh about it. Now if you don't mind…" She said with a little wave of her hand, asking me to get on with my explanation.

So what does every high school boy who finds himself cornered by the girl of his dreams do? Lean over and kiss her? Run for his life? Stutter and stammer like a fool? I chose a combination of options 2 and 3. "I have to get going Madarame. I do hope we can discuss this 'ridiculous theory' sometime…"

"Everyone thinks you like me." She said, halting me in my tracks.

Wonder if option 1 would have worked…

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I had never intended to tell him about this ridiculous idea that Rangiku had come up with but the stupid man had left me with no option! Why wouldn't he giving me a straight answer and stop acting like a foolish boy?

He turned to look at me after I dropped the bomb on him and he stared at me for a few moments.

"I… like you?" He asked incredulously.

"Yes. Boy meets girl, boy follows girl around incessantly; it's bound to be the first conclusion people jump to." I shrugged casually to let him know that I was open to other theories.

"Ah… yes, no doubt." He stuttered. Was this really the man that saved Soul Society? I wondered. Fearless warrior, victorious hero, practically the poster boy for all Shinigami?

"Yes… that is ridiculous." He said with a nervous laugh.

"That's what I said. Don't worry I'm not encouraging it. I know how damaging silly rumors can be to a man in your position, so I think you better do something about it."

"Do something? Like what?" He asked me slowly.

"I don't know Kurosaki Taicho? Haven't you ever dealt with crazy fan chics and rumors before?" I asked, getting increasingly impatient with the man's stupidity. The hottest man in Sereitei was an imbecile and I decided I would have to change my vote.

"Crazy fan chics?" He squeaked in surprise.

"Yes Kurosaki Taicho. Crazy fan chics. You're _the_ Kurosaki Ichigo after all, you must have had at least a few women throwing themselves at the returning hero that saved all of Soul Society."

"Um… yes. I suppose there were, but I don't think I could do what I did with them in our situation…" He said looking a little embarrassed. Oh Kami did I want to hear this?

"Did you sleep with every single one and then acted like you didn't recognize them the next day?"

"NO!" he yelled horrified.

"More than one at a time?" I suggested.

"NO! Where do you get these ideas?" He demanded, brows knitting further in anger.

"Well then what did you do?" I demanded.

"If you MUST know," He growled as he stalked towards me angrily, until he was glowering down at me, "I scowled at them and told them to fuck off and it worked!"

"Ah." I said realizing that in our situation, he was _my _crazy fan chic. "So do you want me to scowl at you and tell you to fuck off?" I suggested slowly.

"WHAT? NO!" He yelled, completely enraged by my suggestions.

"Ok then you come up with a better idea." I said calmly, what was he getting his panties in a bunch for anyway?

"I WILL!" He hissed, bending down to glare at me.

"Fine." I said without breaking eye contact.

"FINE!" He repeated, wanting to get the last word in. He continued to glare at me and I refused to baulk at the challenge. Hell, he was the one following me around, why did I need to back down?

Suddenly the eyebrows snapped apart and he wasn't glaring at me anymore, he was _gazing_. So this is what he looked like when he wasn't scowling…. His eyes were… beautiful. Still very intense and practically glowing in the dying rays of the setting sun, but not half as intimidating as when he was frowning.

He inclined his head a little and… wait, what the fuck?

"Kurosaki Taicho?" I asked slowly. He blinked but didn't move away, he was still _gazing_. Time to snap this sucker out his little… whatever the fuck he was doing.

"OW! What the fuck Madarame!" He yelped, furiously rubbing at the burn between his eyes.

"That's my line Kurosaki." I said pointing an accusing finger at him. "What the fuck?"

He scowled at me angrily but said nothing for a few moments. "I'll deal with the rumors." He said softly, before shunpoing away.

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"You did not!" I exclaimed, completely flabbergasted by this silly girl! How could she be so stupid?

"I did." She said simply, looking annoyed. Kurosaki Ichigo, one of the most eligible bachelors of Sereitei, (he even came without the added baggage of a dead wife!) almost kissed her and she zapped him between the eyes!

"BUT WHY HAYA?" I asked again.

"Because it was fucking ridiculous, that's why." She said turning to me angrily. "Why are you acting like this Ran? I was at least expecting you to have some sense. Yumichika may have his crazy dandy ideas, but as a woman I expected you to have a little more sense!"

"I am offended Haya-chan!" Pouted Yumichika. "How can you be so offensive? It is so ugly!"

"It's not that I think you are not sensible Yumichika, it's just that when the shit hits the fan the woman is the one to bear the brunt of it. And in this case, it _will_ hit the fan and it will be twice as bad because he's a _Taicho!_" I explained.

"How can you be so sure unless you give it a try?" I demanded. "Haya you have to give it a chance!"

"I will NOT, Ran!" She nearly screamed in frustration at Yumichika and me. "This is far too big for me to just leave it to chance!"

She looked away angrily and threw her arms up in the air in resigned frustration. "Today he's curious about the chic covered in scars, who possesses an unexplained, strange source of strength, but tomorrow the novelty will wear off and then what will I be? Kurosaki's discard? Kami forget what people will think of me, how could I possibly live with myself after that?"

Her words stung like an openhanded slap across my cheek. Of course she would question it over and over, until hell froze over! I glanced at Yumichika and saw that he had felt it to.

"Haya…"

"Ran…" She said softly, still avoiding our gaze. "Just let it alone from now on. He said he would deal with the rumors and that's enough for me." And without a backward glance she was gone, eyes clouded, smile wiped away, reiatsu completely suppressed. We would not find her again until she was ready to be found.

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She completely suppressed her reiatsu now when she went on her runs and was completely impossible to find. Rangiku had let it slip that she was doing it quite deliberately.

"She doesn't want to be found." She said casually, glancing in my direction. "Wants to go on her runs in peace. It's her alone time you see."

I groaned inwardly at her pointed comment and wondered the hell I was going to do. The day we had almost kissed, I had more than just gazed into her eyes. I had felt her warm breath on my face, a whiff of her scent had hit me when I leaned down to glare at her and I had noticed the delicate curl of her eyelashes… I absolutely needed to talk to her. I knew she felt something too, because she had paused as well. I had seen her eyes widen slowly as she looked into mine. Only difference was that she had gotten a hold of herself before I did and zapped me between the eyes. I had to talk to her.

But I had to find her if I was going to talk to her, and before that I needed to decide what the hell I was going to say! I had hoped to corner her after one of the drinking bashes, but ever since the embarrassing 'almost kiss' she'd always stuck close by Ikkaku and left with the 11th Division members, so that was out. I had to find her alone if I was going to have a private conversation with her.

So believe me when I say that I was surprised when I found her floating languidly in a lake, half naked and drenched to the bone, hair swirling around her head like a giant black lily pad. I was shocked, dumbfounded, thunderstruck and thoroughly unnerved by how utterly ravishing she looked.

Her eyes were closed and she was floating on her back, one arm stretched past her head to keep her from bumping into anything, the other was stretched out languidly by her side, her legs kicking slowly to keep her moving in the water. She was dressed in a modest exercise tank and boy shorts that clung to her and detracted nothing from her beauty. The tank ended a little above her rib cage, exposing the scar on her side. Clearly she had come here to be alone and I stood absolutely still on the banks of the lake, hoping she wouldn't notice my presence; I had managed to get this close after all.

But it was not to be, and her snapped open. In an instant she was before me, glaring at me with those incredible, bewitching eyes and I could see the speckles growing with her anger.

"You!" She hissed. "What are you doing here?"

"What? Now I can't go for a walk in Rukongai?" I demanded.

"Did you have to walk _this_ way?" She snarled, practically spitting the words out at me. "You have any idea how difficult it was to find this place? Did you have to fucking come _here_?"

"Madarame I am not following you around." I said as calmly as I could. "You have your reiatsu completely suppressed and I suck at sensing reiatsu, but you already know that. So exactly what are you accusing me of?"

She continued to glare at me and although her anger was completely undiminished, she didn't respond in anger anymore. "What do you want Kurosaki?" She asked softly. "Don't give me half-baked excuses and don't lie to me. Tell me what the fuck you want."

"I want to talk to you." I said slowly, wondering what the hell I was going to say to her.

"Ok. Talk." She crossed her arms across her chest and tapped a naked foot impatiently.

"I… uh… Go out to dinner with me." I spluttered.

"What?" She exclaimed, eyes widening in surprise.

"Have dinner with me?" I repeated hesitantly.

She blinked in surprise once more and then her fury was back. "They were _right!_ Oh fucking hell, they were RIGHT!" She said closing her eyes and turning away from me.

"Yes they were right!" I snapped. "So what of it? Will you go out with me or not?"

"No." Came her almost instantaneous reply. She still had her back turned to me and I just stood there in surprised silence. She swiveled around to look at me once more, eyes narrowed, voice as cold as a Siberian gale, "No _Kurosaki Taicho_, I will not go out with you."

"Why not?" I demanded. The coldness and vehemence of her reply had not bruised my ego, she had _cut_ it.

"I will not be reduced to another notch in the proverbial Kurosaki belt." She said softly, eyes sparking in anger. "Besides, I think you have seen all you came to see. I assure you there are no more scars under my clothes."

"What?" I mumbled in surprise.

"Want me to turn around for you again?" She asked stretching her arms away from her body. "This one is the worst of the lot." She pointed to the long, jagged line that stretched from under her ribs to her hipbone.

"The others… you've seen." She swiveled slowly, her arms stretched out, letting me see every inch of her. She looked up at me in disdain, "Done? Or do you need another minute?"

"Haya, you're being ridiculous." I said and shrugged out of my captain's haori intending to cover her with it.

"What? Can't look at them anymore?" She hissed, when she saw me step towards her. "Still want to take me out?"

"Yes." I draped the haori across her shoulders and looked into her stormy eyes, wondering what I would need to tell her to convince her.

"I don't spark in bed."

"What?" Kami this girl was nuts!

"I don't spark when I have an orgasm."

"Haya why are you telling me this?" I exclaimed in frustration.

"What are you so curious about? Ask me, I'll tell you. I'm not shy." She continued in her cold, hard voice.

"I'm curious about nothing…"

"Then why do you want to take me to dinner? You don't need to feed me to sleep with me."

"Haya will you please just shut up!"

"What do you _want_ Kurosaki Taicho?" She asked again.

"I want you!" I blurted before I could get a hold of myself.

She studied me coolly for a whole minute before replying, "Well I am sorry Kurosaki Taicho, but I am not yours to have."

She handed me my haori, picked up her clothes from nearby and left me feeling… zapped.

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:D

Dont forget to review!!!


	16. Chapter 15B

Read on.....

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**Chapter 15B**

I was shaking when I got back to the 11th and everyone looked at me in worry.

"I'm fine. I'm just cold 'cause I'm dripping wet." I said and walked as fast as I could away from them. "Nothing a warm bath won't cure."

A warm bath did nothing to calm my nerves and I continued to shake like a stupid, freaking leaf.

"_Why are you so distressed, kiddo?" Asked Inadzuma in his calm, deep voice. "All the orange said was that he liked you."_

"Don't be ridiculous Inadzuma. He said nothing of the sort. He's been following me around like some kind of crazy stalker and today he asked me out to dinner. DINNER! The nerve of the man."

"_And what is so terrible about going out to dinner?" He asked softly. "A girl's gotta eat after all. Eat with the orange. It won't kill you." _

"Why are you encouraging this madness Inadzuma?" I pleaded. "Who's side are you on?"

"_Yours kiddo, how can you even ask?" He asked, sounding a little disappointed. _

"I'm sorry, my bad. Shouldn't have said that."

"_Go out to dinner with him. It won't kill you." He said soothingly. "You like him too, kiddo. Why are you fighting it?" _

"I don't like him." I muttered stubbornly.

"_Kiddo… you can't fool me. I'm a part of your soul, so stop lying to both of us. Everyone seems to like him and Ikkaku trusts him. Give the man a chance."_

"I'll think about it. Arigato Inadzuma."

"_Hai, hai. Don't forget to scrub behind your ears." _

"Inadzuma…" I muttered testily.

But he was gone leaving me with the memory of his inscrutable smile and my conflicting thoughts on all that is orange.

'I want you.' He had said. Like I was some object to be possessed and put on display! The audacity of it all shocked me, and there were the reactions of everyone around me. Ran and Yumichika were all for it, but I chalked that up to their unnatural urge to meddle in people's love-lives. But Ikkaku and Hisagi were a little harder to ignore. Hisagi for one hated to meddle but even he had carefully pointed out that Kurosaki seemed very interested in me. If it hadn't been for the small smile tugging at his lips I would have assumed he was cautioning me. But they were all amused! Happy and elated and amused and I just didn't get it. This whole situation had 'disaster' painted all over it in red bold letters but no one else seemed to see it! How could a strange man stalking me be a good thing? HOW? And how could his obsession with me possibly be an indication of anything other than a mad man's fantasy? He knew nothing of me and I found it hard to give any credence to the claims that he 'liked me'. He wanted something, but I doubted it had anything to do with 'liking me'.

And now I suppose you're all wondering how I felt about him. Well, I was… intrigued. Everyone seemed to know so much _of _him, but very few seemed to really _know_ him. And there was his utterly impossible relationship with Kuchiki Byakuya! What on earth was that about? Apparently Byakuya would have preferred Ichigo to Renji for a brother-in-law, and that's how they had got be friends, but it still didn't make any sense to me! So yes, I was intrigued. Kurosaki Ichigo, Taicho of the 5th, heralded champ of Sereitei, peerless warrior, man of surprising friends, incapable of controlling his reiatsu, orange hair, perpetual frown, eyes of the most bewitching shade of burnt sienna, lips that looked good enough to eat….

I admit – he's very attractive and I totally get why women are queuing up outside his door. But that was still no reason for me to behave like a buffoon and 'date' the man. Men like him don't 'date' 4th Seats of the 11th. It just doesn't happen.

Over the next few days I continued our little game of cat and mouse. I suppressed my reiatsu and avoided him whenever I could and when I couldn't, I stuck by Ikkaku or Zaraki, knowing that he wouldn't pull me aside in front of either of them. But clearly I had underestimated the man, because one day he did corner me and in broad daylight too.

Ikkaku had just put me through a grueling session and I was weary beyond description. I hung back to stretch my weary limbs a little and settled cross-legged on the grass. No sooner had I taken my first deep calming breath, than I sensed the presence of another creeping towards me. I smiled at Ikkaku's endless efforts to catch me off guard and waited for him to get within striking distance. I kept my eyes closed and relaxed myself further, squaring my shoulders and letting the tension drain from my arms.

When I had sensed him within 10 feet of me, I jumped to my feet and raised my hand to zap him on that delicate spot on his chest, just under the sternum, but he wasn't there! Suddenly a hand encircled my waist, and before I could do anything else, I found myself streaking through the air.

The hand over my mouth slid off and I glimpsed orange from the corner of my eye.

"You!" I exclaimed in surprise and mounting anger.

"Yes me. Thought I was Ikkaku again, didn't you?" Smirked Kurosaki, referring to the time I had accidentally zapped him and Kuchiki when I mistook them for Ikkaku and Yumichika. Needless to say, I stopped zapping people with my eyes closed after that, especially when I was tired and worn out and too darn lazy to really check the distinctive signature of the reiatsu.

"What do you think you're doing Kurosaki? Let go of me right now!" I demanded angrily.

"No, not until you talk to me. You've run from me long enough I think." He said coldly, without looking at me.

"There is nothing to talk about. We finished having this conversation. And please don't flatter yourself any more than you already do on my account. I am not running from you!"

"Yes you are and stop wriggling before I drop you."

"That's kind of the point of my wriggling. To get as far away from you as possible."

He turned to look at me, his amber eyes shrouded and I couldn't tell if he was angry or not. "We're almost there." He said coldly and turned away from me once more.

'There' turned out to be a beautiful and untouched lake that extended as far as the eye could see. Wild water lilies grew by the banks and the calm of the place took my breath away. He was trying to be nice, but I was tired and irritated and feeling plain petty.

"Did you really think a hallmark worthy spot would change my mind Kurosaki?" I snarled.

"Kami Haya, why do you have to be so difficult?" He asked sounding irritated.

"And what would you prefer? Sweet? Slightly air-headed? Do you want me to giggle for you Kurosaki-_kun_?" I asked in a syrupy tone that turned my own stomach.

"Haya…" He said sighing in frustration.

"What Kurosaki? WHAT?"

"Why the fuck can't you call me Ichigo?"

"What?" I squeaked in surprise. And suddenly he was kissing me, a hand in my hair holding me still, the other on the small of my back pulling me closer to him, amber eyes cut off from view by delicate eyelids, astoundingly soft lips caressing mine.

Against my better judgment and all the voices of reason calling out in my head, I found myself melting into his kiss. He smelled of sunlight, soap and something else that completely obliterated any resistance I may have been inclined to put up. His hands, like his lips were surprisingly gentle and I found myself wanting more. I pushed up onto the tips of my toes, kissing back and I think the reaction surprised him, because he gasped.

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He needed her to shut up and listen to him and in a rash moment he decided to fall back on option 1 and kiss her. He kissed her like he'd always wanted to, like he'd always intended to. The girl seemed to already hate him, it couldn't possibly get much worse…

Her luscious lips were softer than he had imagined, her skin even smoother. She smelled like the earth after a long hard rain, mixed in with a tinge of the spices that she loved to put in her tea and he drank in the scent of her skin, willing the moment to last forever.

Unaware of the effect he was having on the girl, he continued to kiss her softly, gently, slowly, expecting her to break away at any moment and was taken completely by surprise when she kissed him back. He gasped at the sensation and it startled her, but he wasn't willing to let go of her now. He angled his lips over hers, sucking on her delectable lower lip. She leaned into his embrace, hands pressing into his hard, muscled chest, yielding to the onslaught of his lips on hers.

She moaned as he nibbled her lip, tongue flicking over the bruise soothingly, the sound of her voice frazzling every last coherent thought in his head. Her mouth yielded to the increasing pressure of his own, and her tongue brushed tantalizingly against his, inviting him to explore.

His arms tightened around her possessively as his tongue probed, tasted and titillated until she was finally willing to give him what he had asked for.

"Ichigo…" She moaned and he broke away to look into her eyes, clouded over with desire.

"Haya." He murmured before kissing her again, an urgency quickly creeping into their kiss, hands tightening, bodies crushed against each other. He broke away from her lips and kissed her softly along her jaw, moving down onto the smooth column, of her neck.

"Ichigo!" she gasped as she felt his mouth descend onto her neck, kissing, sucking, nibbling.

"Haya…" he murmured again, voice husky with desire. "I'm not asking as Kurosaki, Taicho of the 5th Division." He punctuated his words with delicate kisses along her throat, moving back up to her lips. He kissed her once more on the lips, gently, gazing deep into her eyes, allowing her to see the depths of his emotion in his own.

"When I say I want you, I'm asking you as just a man." He murmured softly against her mouth. "As just Ichigo."

She trembled as the words washed over her in a cascade of terrifying clarity. There were no more excuses to hide behind because he had just obliterated them all with a single stroke. The fears and the doubts and the questions rose in a single destructive tsunami within her and she bolted.

She bolted like a startled deer, darting away from him in a rush of shunpo, flustered, agitated and most of all fearful.

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I freaked out. Oh Kami, he'd kissed me and I'd freaked out. What the hell was wrong with me, I wondered. I sighed as I leaned my head against the wood paneled wall behind me.

Well… nothing really, if you thought about it. Kurosaki was after all, just some guy and I didn't know him very well. Yes, he's hot and he's the hero that saved the whole universe and all that, but none of that is really indicative of him being a nice guy! Aizen was a real charmer and see what he turned out to be like! Kuchiki is a fantastic warrior and he's cold, nasty, obsessive, and for all intents and purposes, slightly crazy. Zaraki Taicho is undefeatable and he's… wonderful to me, but again slightly loony (in a good 'not Kuchiki' way). So, when you really think about it all, it's not that strange that I should have doubts.

"_You don't have doubts, you have trust issues." Cut in Inadzuma, curtly._

"And so what if I do?" I snapped back.

"_Why don't you trust him?"_

"Why should I trust him?"

"_Because he has done nothing for you not to!"_

"That's not a reason! That's just stupid and … and insane! It's like deciding to NOT run away from a hungry lion because he hasn't bared his teeth at you yet!"

"_The orange is not a hungry lion…"_

"Ok so maybe that was a bad example, but that still doesn't make any of this a good idea!"

"_Maybe… but you cannot hide forever kiddo. Not from him and not from your very obvious feelings for the orange."_

"I'M NOT HIDING!" I yelled, but he merely shook of his head wearily. I ignored him.

But he was right… I _was_ hiding. I had snuck into the large indoor training halls in the 3rd Division, knowing they were hardly ever used. Renji was an outdoors guy and these buildings usually remained empty and vacant the whole year round. Even if Renji did find me, he wouldn't mind. I sighed again and settled back to watch the rain.

It was coming down in sheets and although the rain did help to calm me a little bit, it did nothing for the embarrassment and anger I was feeling. I was embarrassed and angry with myself for behaving like a fool, like a coward. What kind of idiot runs from a guy who practically lays his heart out for you? And yes, he was just a guy wasn't he? '… just a man.' He had said. Kami, I'm so pathetic…

"_Why don't you just go talk to him?" Suggested Inadzuma again, sensing my deepening gloom._

"And say what? I'm sorry I ran? I'm sorry for acting like an idiot? I'm sure he doesn't want to see me anyway."

"_You can't be sure until you see him…"_

"I can't face him Inadzuma… Kami I'm so embarrassed!" I rubbed my eyes wearily and wondered if Rangiku would have any ideas, when a voice cut through my contemplation and I froze.

"Haya?" It said, sounding very surprised.

"Kurosaki Taicho." I didn't look up and I bit my lip, cursing my luck. Why couldn't the stupid man just give me some time to get my thoughts in order?

He was just standing there at the entrance, dripping wet from the rain, looking at me in surprise. The spiky orange hair was almost a dark rusty color now, but no less spiky and I couldn't help but notice that he looked good enough to eat.

"What are you doing here?" He exclaimed in surprise.

"I came to watch the rain." I answered.

"At the 3rd Division?" He asked again.

"What do you think Kurosaki?" I snapped impatiently, "I'm hiding!"

"But I would never come to the 11th looking for you, so why are you here?" He continued, approaching me slowly, dripping all over the wooden floor.

"Because I'm hiding from everyone. How did you find me? No one ever finds me here."

"I didn't. I come here to train sometimes… when I don't want to be found." He said softly and I stood up as he neared. He was gazing at me again, no scowl, sienna eyes glowing in the dim lights of the room.

"I hate the rain." He said suddenly.

"I love the rain."

We continued to stare at each other as I tried to find the words to tell him I'm sorry. I looked down at my hands, annoyed with myself.

"Ichigo…" But I couldn't finish because in an instant he had closed the gap between us and his lips were on mine. He kissed me urgently, passionately, his hands pulling me closer, crushing me against his chest. I couldn't think anymore, he had overloaded every one of my senses. I sunk my fingers into his damp orange hair and gave in to the overwhelming sensation of Kurosaki Ichigo kissing me. I tasted his tongue on mine, drank in his masculine scent and sighed at the feel of his strong, hard body against mine.

"Don't ever call me Kurosaki again…" He murmured against my lips.

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He pulled her up onto the tips of her toes, deepening the kiss, tasting every crevice, stroking every sensitive spot in her mouth until she was moaning into his kiss. His hands that were holding her close, flattened against her back, seeking the warmth of her skin, but there were far too many layers between them.

He hoisted her up onto his hips, pinning her between him and the wall behind her and she willing wrapped her legs around him. His hands found the ties of her shihakusho and his trembling fingers struggled to free her of the garment.

"Ichigo…" she moaned as she felt his mouth travel down her neck in a trail of demanding, arousing bites and nibbles. His hands ripped the last ties of her shihakusho away and found her bare smooth skin.

"Ichigo!" She gasped at the feel of his rather cold fingers on her skin.

"Sorry," He murmured between his kisses, "my hands are cold."

"They won't be for long…" She murmured, sliding her hands onto his, pressing them against her bare skin. She slipped her hands under his shihakusho, drawing it away from his shoulders and kissed him softly. The feel of her warm breath on his rain soaked skin sent a shudder through him and he tightened his grip on her.

"Haya…" he groaned and she could feel the heights of his desire coursing through his veins, dripping off of very moan that escaped through his lips. She reached for his hakama knowing what he wanted and she felt his own hands struggle with hers.

Garments were tossed haphazardly as they fought each other impatiently, a rip here and tear there, until there was nothing that could keep their flesh from melding together. He gasped as he thrust into her impatiently and she moaned against his shoulder.

"Ichigo…" she murmured over and over again as he plunged into her wildly, his desire in complete command over his body.

Her hands tightened around his back and he felt her teeth sink into his shoulder as she came closer and closer to her climax.

"Kami Ichigo…" Her back arched as the sizzling bolts of pleasure flooded through her limbs and she gripped him tighter.

He sped up, pounding into her a little harder knowing she was close. "Hai Haya, I'm here…" he murmured into the crook of her neck, "with you…."

And it was all she needed.

"Ichigo!" She cried out, clutching him as the overwhelming warmth flooded through her, searing flashes of white threatening to blind her. She tightened around him in the throes of her passion and he groaned as he followed her over the cliffs of perfect release.

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She buried her head against my shoulder and refused to face me. I kissed her forehead and nuzzled her neck, but she wouldn't look up.

"Haya." I called softly, wondering if this had been a mistake. It hadn't felt like a mistake, it had felt… right, perfect. But her silence was starting me to make me nervous.

"Ichigo…" she murmured softly and I breathed a sigh of relief. I tugged on her hair and she slowly moved back to face me.

"You ran." I said softly, as she raised her blue-black eyes to meet mine.

"I did." She answered softly.

"Don't run again." It was more a question than a statement.

"Hai, won't run again." She said with a little smile.

"Why?" I asked after a brief pause.

"I freaked out." She said, a small blush of embarrassment creeping into her cheeks. I watched her for the longest time, studying her dark eyes, the delicate curl of her lashes, the small pert nose and those sultry lips that made me want to kiss her senseless every time I saw her.

"What?" She asked slowly.

"You're beautiful."

"You don't need to say that." She said, her eyes clouding a little. "Don't tell me they don't bother you." Her hand closed around mine and she ran it slowly down her side, over her jagged scar, the worst of the lot. "I won't believe you." She said softly and I nodded. The scars ran deeper than just her skin and I would just have to find a way to show her how I felt about her.

"You're coming with me." I said lowering her to the ground.

"Huh?" She murmured in surprise, reaching hurriedly for her clothes. I pulled on my hakama and strapped Zangetsu onto my back, waiting only long enough for her to tie her hakama in place. I wrapped my haori over her shoulders as she was strapping her zanpaktou to her waist.

"What are you doing Ichigo?" She asked, looking a little worried.

"You're coming with me." I repeated and gripped her by the waist, pinning her to my side. I shunpoed us as quickly as I could to my home, ignoring her protests.

"You can't do this!" she exclaimed.

"Watch me."

"Where are you taking me?" She demanded

"You'll see."

She was spitting mad by the time I landed outside my front door and had never looked more beautiful. Her hair was damp from the rain, the droplets running down her face in tiny rivulets. My thin white haori was wet and quite transparent now and shielded little. She glared at me angrily and crossed her arms around her chest when she caught me staring.

"Pervert." She hissed, but she had quit trying to get away from me.

"Not running anymore?" I asked sarcastically.

"I'm dressed in nothing but your haori. I'm only coming in to get a shihakusho." She said sternly.

"All of which will be too big for you."

"Yes, but they won't have your insignia stamped on the back." She pointed out, with angry eyes narrowed at me.

I shrugged. "If you want to leave, I won't stop you." I unlocked the door and she stepped inside before me.

She stood in the middle of my living room, looking around herself. I leaned against the wall, and stood back to watch, waiting for her next move. Her eyes roved quickly over the furniture, slowed a little over the bookshelves and then very quickly returned to glare at me.

"Give me a shihakusho." She demanded.

I inclined my head in the direction of my bedroom. "Help yourself."

Her eyes narrowed and I saw a glint creep into her eyes as her lips stretched into an angry, savage grin. "If you want me in your bedroom, you're gonna have to do better than that."

"I meant what I said earlier." I replied keeping my voice even, despite my growing desire for her. "If you want to leave, I won't stop you."

"I'm not going in there." She said crossing her arms defiantly.

"Then stay out here." I pointed to the wet haori that clung to her skin, "In that."

She snarled at me in frustration and stepped towards my bedroom. "Touch me and I'll zap you." She warned. I smiled and followed her at a careful distance.

I leaned against the frame of the door, watching as she rummaged through my closet, pulling out a shihakusho. She turned away from me and peeled the wet haori off her shoulders.

"I thought you said you weren't shy." I said staring at her hard back, aching to lick the rain drops off her skin.

"I'm not." She snapped, pulling the shihakusho around her hastily. "But that's no reason to encourage your perversion."

"My perversion? I've already seen everything there is to see."

She turned slowly to face me, the speckles in her eyes becoming more defined. She was getting really riled up. "Oh trust me Ichigo, you ain't seen nothing yet."

I raised an eyebrow and smiled. Damn she was beautiful and I wanted to ravish her right there and then, but I stood back and waited, and watched.

She smiled slowly, her anger dissipating just as quickly as it had grown. "Well I'm off. Thanks for letting me borrow this." She walked up to me at the door and smiled again, "I'll bring it back sometime…"

She kissed my cheek softly. "Bye." She whispered and turned to leave.

I grabbed her wrist and swiveled her back towards me, pinning her against me. "Where do you think you're going?"

"You said you would let me leave, if I wanted to." She said evenly, smiling up at me smugly.

Two could play at this game. I smiled back. "That's right, I did. Kiss goodbye?" I asked, leaning into kiss her and she didn't resist me.

I kissed her gently, languorously, teasing her willing lips open and softly tasting her depths. She was softening in my hands and I continued until I felt her hands tighten just that little extra around my shoulders.

I pulled back and gently kissed her forehead. "Bring it back anytime."

"What?" She whispered in a daze.

"The shihakusho. Bring it back anytime, there's no rush."

Her eyes widened in surprise and then narrowed in fury. "You dirty…"

But I didn't let her continue. I kissed her, not so gently this time and lifted her so that she was left clutching my shoulders with her feet dangling in the air. I walked towards the bed and lowered her onto it, pinning her down under me.

She moaned softly and I soon felt her hands creeping up into my hair as she became more aroused.

"Still wanna leave?" I smirked.

"Don't push it Ichigo."

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Review People! Please Review!!!!

Thank you's to all my readers. I know some of you guys are reading my stuff, but I still cant tell if you like it or not! But thanks anyway!!!!


	17. Chapter 16

Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU to all my reviewers!!!!

OK so we're hitting the light stuff. Fluffy, and mushy (but no lemon in this one :( ) and sets the ground work for some later stuff. So ENJOY!!

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**Chapter 16: Sex, Secrets and Photographs**

"Ran, I need you to hide me."

"What?" I shrieked in surprise, looking up from the papers in front of me. "Oh Haya, it's you. Why? What have you done?"

"I haven't done anything. I just need you to hide me somewhere so I can get some sleep." She said, stumbling towards my desk. "Is Hitsugaya Taicho around? Can I crash on your couch?"

She stretched out on the couch before I could answer any of her questions, her eyes closing before her head hit a cushion. Her uniform was in disarray, a small rip in the seam of the left shoulder, and her hair was an utter and complete mess, with strands falling out of the knot and sticking to her sweaty forehead and neck. A slight limp and the dark circles under her eyes completed the 'something really awful happened' look.

"What in Kami's name happened to you?" I asked slowly.

"Ichigo. Kurosaki Ichigo happened." She murmured. She raised a tired arm to her forehead, shielding her eyes from me and I was suddenly worried. She never hid from me.

"What did the idiot do? Did you two have a fight?"

"He's killing me Ran." She wailed softly. "Slowly but surely, that insatiable mutt is killing me."

I couldn't possibly be hearing her right. I absolutely could not be hearing this!

"There's no end to it Ran and I'm exhausted! I really am exhausted. I haven't slept in days and I'm so tired. Every morning the guys still expect their breakfast and I have so much work at the division, it really isn't fun anymore. I don't know why I'm doing this to myself…"

If she was expecting me to say something, she had another thing coming because I was shell-shocked! I held absolutely still, trying to think up an appropriate response.

"Kami I think I'm becoming an addict. It's becoming a little like your nightly drinking bouts. Y'know, it's awesome while you're at it, but then the morning comes and brings with it very, very bright sunshine, DISTURBINGLY bright! And there's work to be done, but you're sore and dehydrated and you start to wonder why you did it in the first place! So you chide yourself and drag yourself out of bed and out into the disturbingly bright day and you survive it all, telling yourself that tonight you're going to get some sleep. But then it gets dark and before you know it you're going out looking for your drug of choice…. Ran I'm loosing my mind from lack of sleep."

That she most certainly was. Her little tirade had taken up more than what used to be a week's worth of conversation.

"And Ichigo is your drug of choice?"

"Hai, like yours is sake." She said, nodding weakly.

"So let me get this straight. You come in here because you need a place to hide from Ichigo so that you can _sleep_, but along the way you're also calling me an alcoholic? Am I still expected to help you?" I asked, a little miffed at her constant mention of my _love_ for sake. Yes, I _love_ sake, I am not dependent on it like some common drunk! There IS a difference!

"Ran, I'm so fucking tired that I'm seeing double! Oh! Did you hear that Ran? I made a pun! Get it? _Fucking_ tired!" She began to giggle uncontrollably and as much as I wanted to stay angry with her I couldn't. I shook my head and walked over to her, picking up the thin blanket that usually lay draped over the couch.

"Very funny. Ha ha." I said, draping the blanket over her. She sighed and curled onto her side, burying her face in the cushion. "Sleep tight."

"Arigato Rangiku-sama. I owe you a boat load of sake."

"Hai… that you do."

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I awoke with start and immediately looked around for Ichigo, but he wasn't there. The surroundings were unfamiliar but that was no real surprise, he had been dragging me into every empty nook and cranny and I was no longer surprised about where I woke up.

"Did you sleep well?" Asked a feminine voice from behind, making me jump almost 5 feet into the air.

"Kami Rangiku! You scared me to death!" I snapped, still struggling to rub the sleep out of my eyes.

"You snore a little. Did you know that?" She asked from behind her desk.

"I do not, liar." I said, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes as I walked over to her. I slumped into one the chair across from her. "Hitsugaya still AWOL?"

"Yep." She said, with a small curt nod. "If I didn't know better, I'd say it was a girl."

I chuckled at her little quip and sighed, still a little sleepy. "Ran?"

"Hmm?" She murmured absently, while looking over some form or the other.

"How did I get here?"

She laid down her brush to peer at me. "You don't remember a thing, do you?" She asked incredulously.

"I'm sure it'll come back to me eventually…" I muttered uncertainly.

"Kami! You really don't remember!" She shrieked, her face breaking into a joyous grin and I knew I was in for it.

"You stumbled in here after a riotous 'session' with our orange friend and collapsed on the couch. You said something about loving to squeeze his butt and suck on his elbow!"

"Did not! Suck on his elbow? Why on earth would I do that? Wait, do you like sucking on someone's elbow?"

"So you do love squeezing his butt!" She exclaimed before erupting into a fit of giggles.

"I said no such thing Ran! Stop putting words in my mouth!" I protested, but to no avail. She continued to laugh, doubled over until she was gasping.

"Kami, I can't believe it! You don't remember a thing, he quite literally fucked you into a concussion!" She squealed before doubling over to laugh at her own joke… again.

"I don't have a concussion. I do remember how I got here. I came here from Ichigo's office…" I tried to continue, but was interrupted again.

"You did it in his office? I've always wondered about office sex…. Was it hot? Did Momo hear you?"

"Ran… I'm going to go now. I'll see you later, yeah? In the meantime, try not to go blue in the face." I said, rising to leave.

"Oh c'mon Haya! Give me a juicy tit bit!" She teased, winking at me.

"Matsumoto Rangiku!" I sputtered angrily. "I do not kiss and tell!"

"And how you manage to do so is completely beyond me! Kami the man is good enough to eat! How can you possibly kiss that and NOT tell?" She exclaimed.

I frowned at her, but didn't bother to answer her. "The same way you don't kiss and tell." I paused and she grinned sheepishly. "I'll catch you later." This was a discussion for another time and I wasn't up to it.

"Have you told the boys yet?" She asked, as I moved to leave her office.

"No… not yet." I murmured guiltily, remembering my motley crew back at the 11th.

"And what are you waiting for?"

"I'm not entirely sure…" I said, turning around to face her. "I'm not sure what to tell them."

She inclined her head and smiled at me. "I think it's pretty simple. You two are clearly head over heels in love with each other."

I sighed. She had been telling me this for a while now, but I wasn't all that sure. Does sneaking into dark corners constitute undying love? Is staying there until neither of you can move a limb a declaration of adoration that will endure the test of time? How about a blatant disregard for all other aspects of you life, friends, family and work? Is that love? Sure didn't sound like it, and thus far, that's all we'd done.

"I'm not so sure Ran. I'm not so sure…" I turned towards the door once more.

"Where are you going?" She called from behind me.

"To find Ichigo." I called back as I reached the door.

"Can't get enough eh? Make sure you get some fluids in you before you begin your marathon! You need to keep your strength up if you're hoping to make it till morning. In your current state you won't last an hour!"

I waved and left as quickly as I could. Fluids would be good, but I wouldn't need it. Tonight, we needed to talk.

Maybe some sake wouldn't be such a bad idea…

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The 5th Division offices were dark, as they usually were at that late hour, but he was still there. I could feel his presence; that raw pulsing reiatsu rivaled only by Zaraki Taicho.

I tip toed into his dark office, half expecting him to lunge at me from the darkness (it has happened before), but he didn't. And the only reason he didn't was because he was asleep at his desk. His head lay on his crossed arms on the desk, and the stray beams of light from the window bounced off his orange hair, making his head look like a smoldering slow fire.

I crept forward, using the quiet moments to watch him. This was a novelty indeed for me, for I would not have got more than a few seconds had he been awake. The very knowledge that I was looking at him drove him crazy. Very flattering and all that, but I did so love gazing at him. I felt a little like a thief, cheating him out of his opportunity to pull me onto the table and repeat what we'd done earlier that evening. I blushed at the memory, but cast it out to continue with my perusal.

Awake he was phenomenal, all raw power and strength; stunning and awe inspiring, but in repose he was beautiful. There was no other word for it. I ached to reach out and touch him, the smooth skin and the hard muscle underneath that I knew so well was almost calling out to me, but I held back. Kami alone knew when I would get another chance like this. His brow was relaxed and smooth, and free of its constant furrow, his mouth was parted just a little bit and he looked like a contented brat that had fallen asleep after a day of mischief making. Which in a sense was true.

I smiled and crept forward a little more. I leaned back against his desk and continued to study him in the semi-darkness of his office. He sighed in his sleep and that small sound made my breath hitch. All at once, the sight of him filled me with an irrational nameless fear and I couldn't breathe. What was this strange emotion that made me feel so weak, so helpless?

I wanted to throw my arms around him and hold him forever. I also wanted to run and hide. My heart thudded dully in my chest, a slow niggling ache as I looked down at him. And then it occurred to me that I would be utterly lost without this orange-haired Shinigami. I would have loved to keep things going exactly as they were, but I couldn't quite ignore the way I felt about him. I loved our 'riotous sessions' as Ran liked to call them, but I realized I loved _him_ more. Him. The person. Hmm.

I didn't know what to do with that particular realization and chose instead to run my fingers through his thick orange hair. He stirred, groaning softly and moving his head against my hand like he wanted me to continue. And so I did.

I rubbed my fingertips into his scalp, slowly from the base of his scalp to his forehead in a slow repetitive movement. He moaned appreciatively and I felt a small triumphant smile reach my lips. This is not what I had come here for, but it always felt wonderful to know that a single touch was enough to awaken my beast; my eager, willing and eternally ravenous beast.

"Haya?" He asked groggily. "That you?"

"Is there someone else that runs her fingers through your hair?"

"Jealous?" He asked and I could hear the cockiness in his voice. I tugged on his hair and he turned to look up at me, the familiar smile on his lips.

"No, not at all." I replied.

"Not even a little bit?" He asked, sounding a little hurt. He raised his head tiredly, lacking his usual grace. A small groan escaped his lips belying the stiffness in his body. But none of that stopped him from circling an arm around my waist and pulling me towards him until I was standing between his knees.

"Nope. Not even a little bit." I answered, sinking my fingers into his hair once more, pushing his head backwards until he was looking up at me.

He grinned. "How can you be so sure?"

"You're stiff and achy and can barely move. Even if there was someone else who came here to run her hands through your hair, that's pretty much all she'd get."

"Maybe I'm only pretending, so that you'll leave before she arrives." He suggested, his hands tightening around my waist, his nose gently nuzzling my stomach.

"Oh? Then maybe I shouldn't leave."

"Hai…" he murmured while laying kisses along my stomach. He hadn't moved my shihakusho, but the pressure of his lips alone made my head swim and I bit back a groan. "Maybe you shouldn't."

He continued to nuzzle and kiss me, hands gently kneading my back and I sighed helplessly. "Ichigo…"

He paused for a moment and smiled up at me. The look in his arrested me, stilling my heart for a moment, making me forget to breathe. He pulled me gently into his lap and kissed me like he'd never kissed me before.

His lips were soft against mine, gentle and languorous; his hands strong and firm against my back, holding me in a gentle embrace. He was being … gentle, and so very unlike his usual self. I don't mean to say he was all brute strength in the bedroom. He could be gentle… very, very gentle and feathery especially when he… I digress and the point is that this… was different. Our kiss wasn't charged with the passionate fire like it usually was, his hands weren't reaching for the ties of shihakusho, and his lips lacked their usual insatiable hunger.

He kissed me gently, slowly like he had all the time in the world, almost as if he would be satisfied with just holding me. And oddly enough, I never felt safer than I did at that moment.

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I could see the questions in her eyes before she said anything. Madarame Haya, 4th seat of the 11th Division, fearsome warrior and skilled fighter. But on that day, she was a diffident girl who wasn't sure what she was doing. I pulled her closer to me as I kissed her and I felt her arms tighten around my neck, clinging to me desperately.

When I broke away to look at her, my heart nearly broke. She was trembling slightly, looking nervous and a little shaken. She smiled shyly at me, her fingers still entwined in the collar of my shihakusho.

"You ran away again." I said softly, as I stroked her cheek with my hand.

She looked away from me, eyes fixed on chest. "I… I did. I'm sorry."

I hooked a finger under her chin and forced her to look at me. "Why?"

She smiled sheepishly, but she was still trembling. "I needed to get some sleep Ichigo!" She gushed. "I just couldn't stay, I couldn't. It wasn't a choice, knowing what you would do had I stayed."

"And what would I have done?" I asked.

"You know what you would have done!" She exclaimed. "Insatiable beast!"

"You say that like it's a bad thing." I frowned. I wanted to laugh out loud, but I put forth my best scowl. I was every bit as exhausted as she was, and in some ways was grateful she was bringing this up. In truth, I didn't trust myself to be able to stand without keeling over.

"It's not!" She said shaking her head vehemently. "Really Ichigo, it's not. But anymore, and I will die of exhaustion. Die extremely happy, mind you, but die nonetheless." She looked unsure and apologetic and I couldn't bear to see her look nervous around me.

I kissed her gently on her lips. "I'm so glad you brought this up, 'cause I don't think I can keep this up either."

She laughed and I stayed very still, reveling in that husky sound that so really left her lips. "You have no idea how glad I am to hear that!" She said softly.

"Look around you Haya," I said gesturing to the piles of paperwork that had found its way to my desk, "I'm quite literally buried in work that should have been attended to weeks ago!"

"You have no idea how bad it is at the 11th." She said with a shake of her head, a small smile still playing across her lips.

"How bad?"

"Real bad!" She said widening her eyes for emphasis. "Breakfast, IF it happens, can sometimes exclude sugar coated goodies."

"Yachiru must be loosing her mind!" I exclaimed.

"Yes, and she's taking the whole division with her. You know how she gets."

I nodded in understanding. I did know how Yachiru could get and it wasn't a pretty sight.

Clearly, the situation wasn't good at the 11th because she had begun to sound tired while talking about it. She looked tired too, weary to the bone.

"I feel asleep in the middle of overseeing a training session today." She murmured, looking thoroughly shamefaced.

I laughed before I could catch myself.

"It's not funny Ichigo!" She exclaimed angrily. "Taicho almost took my head off for it. He physically threw me out of the Division and told me to go find my head."

"And instead of doing that you came here…"

"And I lost it a little more thoroughly." She finished with a shy smile.

I could have watched her for hours, as she sat there on my lap, a light blush creeping into her cheeks, eyes trained on mine, a shy smile on her lips. "What do you propose we do?" I asked her.

"How about…" She began uncertainly. I quirked an eyebrow encouragingly and she continued. "How about we… moderate ourselves a little?"

"I'm not sure that's a choice I can make around you Haya." I teased. "When I see you… touch you… I find it hard to exercise any form on control."

She giggled softly at my teasing and leaned in to kiss me softly. "But you've been the perfect gentleman so far."

"Only 'cause I really am far too exhausted to do anything about it."

"Ichigo!" She gurgled against my lips. "We _have_ to do something, we can't continue the way we are."

I sighed and leaned back into the chair. It was true, we really couldn't. Momo had almost lost her temper that morning and if things were bad enough to make Momo lose her temper, Yachiru would do far, far worse.

"Wanna get some sleep?" I asked, looking over at the couch.

A slow, gentle smile stretched across her face. "Yes… I'd love that."

I picked her up and moved towards the couch (no, I didn't trip or stumble, I managed just fine). She was watching me thoughtfully, her eyes gazing into mine, never breaking contact even when I laid her down.

"What?" I asked and she smiled nervously again. "Tell me… I wanna know."

"You're really okay with this?" She asked softly.

I lay down beside her and pulled her into my arms. "Yeah… it's not like we're running out of time or anything. We have forever, right?"

She smiled, but her eyes told me she was unsure. I made a note to myself to do something about that. "Right." She murmured into my chest.

I fell asleep to the sounds of her gentle breathing, the smell of her hair filling my head with the faint scent of cinnamon until I was dreaming of apple pie. It was peaceful, idyllically so.

Unfortunately, I did not wake up feeling as peaceful.

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I have never been more embarrassed in my life.

"How bad?" Asked Ran, walking quickly beside me. We were on our way to the 11th.

"Momo found us together in the office, we didn't notice and then she was joined in her gaping by a bunch of people from the 5th and other divisions and some took photographs. The growing racket did disturb us a little bit, but not enough to wake us and… Kami, Ran I don't want to think about it." I mumbled, as I tried to suppress the embarrassing memories.

"How bad, Haya?" She asked once more.

"Newsworthy bad! Hisagi telling me his hands are tied kind of bad!" I nearly screamed at Ran in my frustration. She touched my shoulder softly and I tried to regain control of my breathing.

"Where is he?" She asked softly, as we hurried along to meet… my doom, my death, my final judgment. Call it whatever you want, the whole prospect scared the hell out of me.

"Busy dealing with the mess at the 5th. Kuchiki got wind of it pretty quick, I don't want to imagine what he has to say about the whole thing!" No matter how hard I tried, I would never understand Ichigo relationship with that crazy man. Oh, do excuse me, crazy _nobleman_!

Ran fell silent under the weight of our worries. But there wasn't time to worry anymore, for we had arrived at the 11th.

"Sure you'll be ok? I don't need to go…" She said holding me by the shoulders and peering into my eyes.

"No you do need to go. You can't be here for this. Taicho wouldn't like it." I said with a sorry shake of my head.

"What he likes and doesn't like he can take up with me!"

"Ran… please just this once, listen to me?" I pleaded. She 'hmfed' angrily, but stepped aside.

I entered the division gates and searched for their reiatsus. Hardly, a difficult task given the fact that Taicho has no control over his whatsoever, but for some reason that morning I had trouble concentrating. Perhaps, it had something to do with the increased attention I was getting from the other members of the 11th…. I ignored them best I could and headed towards Taicho's office.

I found them there; Taicho seated behind is desk, Yachiru perched on his shoulder, Yumichika seated in a chair across from them and Ikkaku smoldering in a corner. Ikkaku's reiatsu was surging like an angry storm gathering strength before lashing into a seaside town, spiking and roiling, and equally Taicho's in its intensity. Kami, save me…

I took one last calming breath, prayed that I lived to see the next sunrise and stepped in.

XxX-------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------XxX

Ikkaku descended on her like a vulture after it's next prey. "And where have you been? Or do I need to ask?"

"Ikka…" Haya began uncertainly.

"Don't you 'Ikka' me! What the HELL were you thinking Haya?" He screamed with enough intensity to blow the bangs off her forehead.

"I…"

"You lied to us! LIED! To US! How could you?" He yelled, refusing to let her get a word in.

"I didn't lie! I just didn't tell you about him!" Haya exclaimed, but Ikkaku wasn't done yet,

"Why didn't you tell us about this… _thing_ you have going on with Kurosaki? You've been distracted for weeks and we were worried. Yes, WORRIED! Because we were all sitting here thinking something was really worrying you, but it turns out your distraction and _exhaustion_ are a direct result of you fucking Kurosaki every waking minute!" Ikkaku bellowed with rage, his head taking on a scary shade of red until I was pretty sure it would go splat like an over ripe tomato.

"Ikkaku." I called in most threatening 'get your act together' voice, but it didn't make a dent.

"You were the one who told me I could have done worse than Kurosaki! Doesn't he meet your standards anymore?" Demanded Haya angrily.

"I said date the guy, not jump into bed with him the next time you saw him!" Yelled Ikkaku.

"Ikkaku." I warned, my voice a little louder this time.

"What Taicho? Don't tell me you're ok with this!" Said Ikkaku, turning to me.

"Stop screaming at Haya, Pachinko." Yachiru chirped from my shoulder before I could get a word in. We were in _my _office, in _my_ division and so far I had not been allowed to say a word!

"SHUT UP!" I roared and that got everybody's attention. "Ikkaku… get out."

"But Taicho…" Objected Ikkaku, but I silenced him with one of my glares.

"I said get out."

He glared back at me for a moment, before turning towards the door. "I'm not done with you." He growled at Haya.

"No you are." I said, and he turned in surprise to face me once more. "_I'm_ going to get to the bottom of this and _I'm_ going to decide what needs to be done. Now get out so I can get on with my day."

He threw an annoyed "Che!" at all of us and slammed the door on his way out. Considering it was Ikkaku, I think it went better than expected.

"Do you want me to leave as well Taicho?" Asked Yumichika from his chair.

"As long as you keep your mouth shut, you can stay. The second you feel like interrupting, I suggest you leave if you wanna stay alive." I told him and he nodded in understanding and then turned to Haya. I grunted at her to begin her side of the story and she swallowed nervously.

"So Haya… why don't you explain to Taicho why you've been sneaking back into the division at dawn." Yumichika said with a little smug smile.

Haya paused and seemed to be collecting her thoughts, when she suddenly stopped and stared hard at Yumichika. "You knew."

"You KNEW?" I bellowed.

Yumichika shrugged and smiled back at me. "I'm a light sleeper. I heard her sneaking in one morning looking like hell and I guessed that it probably had something to do with Kurosaki. So when he stopped showing up for breakfast like he normally did, I KNEW it had something to do with Kurosaki." He looked very pleased with his intelligent detective work, which only infuriated me more.

"And why am I hearing about this now?" I growled at him.

"Because nobody asked me." He said with a nonchalant shrug. "And there's no rule against dating the Taicho of the 5th so I kept it to myself. Haya would tell us when she was good and ready."

"Or fall asleep in his office and be photographed!" Squealed Yachiru in glee. "I can't wait to see those pictures Haya-chan!"

"I bet you can't…" Haya muttered dejectedly, glancing up at me.

Now I had very confidently told Ikkaku that I would decide what needed to be done, but I honestly didn't know what to do. Yumichika was right; there was no rule against her dating or fucking the Strawberry. Did it bother me that she was screwing his brains out? No… not really. What did bother me was that she was exhausted and distracted and dysfunctional. That shit bothered me. It bothered me A LOT.

"Yumichika is right. Do whatever the fuck you want with the Strawb… Kurosaki." I said, looking sternly at Haya. "But you do it on your own time. And that includes the consequences. So the next time you walk in here looking exhausted and fall asleep during a training session, I'm going to go after the St… Kurosaki and make sure he doesn't have the energy to get it on with you for a long, long time."

Haya paled visible and swallowed nervously. "Am I making myself clear here?" I snarled for good measure.

"Hai Taicho. Clear." She squeaked and glanced nervously at Yumichika.

"Now get out, all of you and get back to work." I bellowed. Yumichika and Haya scrambled to get out, quite literally tripping over themselves in the process. Yachiru stayed on my shoulder.

"Yumichika says she's in love with Hollow-chan." She chirped. "Do you think she's in love with Hollow-chan?"

"You knew too?"

She flashed her dazzling smile at me and skipped out of my office, leaving me to wonder how it was that only I had no idea what was going on in my division.

XxX-------------------------------------------XxX--------------------------------------------------------------XxX

I leaned against the gate leading into the 11th Division courtyard. Haya was winding up the session with what looked to be squad of newbies. I loved watching her and I could, quite honestly do it for hours at a stretch. Now if only the Soutaicho would put me in charge of watching Madarame Haya….

She turned to look at me, almost as if she had felt my eyes on her. She sent a small nod my way, but only came over once she had dismissed the squad. Whispers arose from all around us, as she walked over to me. Her lips were pursed into a tight, angry line and her hands were bunched into fists at her side.

"Haya, is…" I said, trying to ask her if she was alright but I was interrupted.

"Yes this IS Kurosaki Ichigo, Taicho of the 5th Division and he is here to see ME." Yelled Haya, as she looked around the courtyard at the other division members. "Is there anything that anyone would like to say OUT LOUD?"

Her eyes flashed and her reiatsu spiked with her anger, making the others step back nervously. "No one? Anyone? Anything at all?" She asked the crowd, a small smirk playing on her lips as if she was hoping someone would step forward with a snide comment.

"Haya, let's go. I wanna talk to you." I murmured and reached out for her hand. She whipped around in my direction and for a moment I wondered if I was going to be the one to face her anger.

"Oh… Ichigo." She murmured and smiled self-consciously. "It's you."

"Of course it's me." I said gently and tugged her towards me. She willingly came into my arms and I shunpoed us out of there as quickly as I could.

"Are you alright?" I asked her, as I made my way to my home. "For a moment there I was sure you were going to beat every single of those guys to a pulp."

"I wanted to." She said softly, laying her head on my shoulder. She sighed wearily.

"Long day?" I asked.

"You have no idea…" Was all she said and I didn't push it further. It could wait until we were home.

She followed me in, dragging her feet tiredly. She stopped in the middle of my living room and turned to face me, and just stared at me for a while, weariness and dejection written into the unhappy lines of her face. "Ichigo…" She murmured, a small tremor of uncertainty in her voice.

I walked over to her and pulled her into an embrace. I didn't know what to say. Kuchiki had had a lot to say about social etiquette and 'behavior that did not become a Taicho of the Gotei', but none of that could possibly compare with what the motley crew would have put her through. "Tell me what happened." I murmured into her hair.

She sighed and turned her face into my shoulder. "Ikkafu elle aty."

"Haya, I can't hear you. You're sounding a little muffled." I tried to draw her away, but she only buried her head into my shoulder further.

"Ikkaf yeddat me."

"Haya, I really can't hear you…"

"IKKAKU YELLED AT ME!" She screamed in frustration. She drew away from me and fell back onto the couch. She moved into a corner and rested her head on her pulled up knees. "He's very, VERY angry."

I nodded slowly as I sat down beside her. I could relate to that. I would be beyond furious if I found out about one of my sisters' relationship the way Ikkaku had. "Do you want me to talk to him?"

"And what would you say?" She asked softly, her head still down.

"I'm not entirely sure…. But I think I should."

"He'll probably want to do something stupid like fight you." She said with a sigh and looked up at me. "He can be a real moron sometimes."

"I would want to deck the guy that slept with my sister." I said with a shrug. "I don't blame him."

"Maybe, but neither of your sisters are Shinigami. They _need_ protecting."

I smiled and slid down the couch towards her. "And you don't?"

She raised an inquiring eyebrow. "Do I?"

I laughed nervously and held my hands up defensively. "Kiddin'." But she didn't look too convinced and continued to stare at me icily. "I was joking Haya! Of course you don't need protecting!"

"Especially not from you." She said softly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I demanded angrily. She couldn't honestly be suggesting that she could take me on!

"Ikkaku long ago told me he approved of you…. That I could have done worse." She said, dropping her chin onto her knees once more, but her eyes stayed on me.

"He did?" I asked in surprise. "You guys discussed me?"

"Oh don't look so smug." She said with a dismissive wave of her hands. "It was months ago, when Ran and Yumichika noticed your drooling and brought it to my attention."

"I was not drooling!" I retorted defensively, but she waved my objections away again. Besides, it was true. I had been drooling.

"So that's my situation." She said. "What did Kuchiki have to say?"

"He said I was am imbecile for not knowing how to keep my personal and work lives separate." I said, leaving out the bulk of his lecture. "Didn't Zaraki have anything to say?"

"Zaraki said as long as I do my fornication on my own time and not fall asleep on the job, he's ok with it. And if I don't, he's going to come find you and fight you until you can't fornicate with me. Kuchiki really had nothing else to say? I was so sure he would give you an earful."

"Zaraki's really ok with this? You and me? Doesn't bother him?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah. Yumichika has known for a while. Saw me sneaking in or something and figured it out. Yachiru doesn't care either way…." She looked up at me in confusion. "Kuchiki really had nothing to say?"

"He did…." I said with a sigh. "I don't wanna get into it."

"That bad?" She asked softly and moved closer to me.

"That bad." I said as I put an arm around her and tucked her into my side. "And Hisagi?"

"Says he can't not publish the pictures. He has to remain _impartial_." She said with groan.

"Bastard."

"I agree."

We stayed on the couch for a while, quiet and occupied with our own thoughts. But none of it was good and I decided I'd had enough for one day.

"Wanna go get something to eat?" I asked.

"Dinner?" She asked looking up at me with a coy smile. "Like a date?"

"Yeah… the one you shot down very rudely when I asked you the first time."

She giggled at the memory. "You really wanna go out? Tonight?"

"It can't get any worse Haya."

"Sure it can! Ikkaku could find us tonight."

"Uh… right." I was not looking forward to that…

"But let's go anyway!"

"Um…"

"What, you chickening out? Kami, this date is never gonna happen…."

"Let's go."

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:D

Tell me what you think ppl!! I know Ikkaku's reaction seems a little benign considering the situation but it will be dealt with a little bit more in the next chapter :)

REVIEWS PPL!! Pretty pls!!!!!


	18. Chapter 17

Ok so I've been told that the switching around in time and space (and all that jazz!) is confusing. So let me just say that we're still quite firmly rooted in Ichigo and Haya's past and will continue to do so for a while.

As for point's of view..... hmmm. I'm a little conflicted on pointing this bit out. I think I provide pretty broad hints so it shouldn't be really difficult to figure out. But hey, anonymous reviews are available to everyone. So if everyone hates it, maybe I'll change it!

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I still own nothing. Dammit!

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**Chapter 17: A Walk in the Clouds? **

The pictures were published in the next issue of the newsletter, some were enraged (Ikkaku and Ichigo's fan club), some were embarrassed beyond comprehension for the Gotei (Byakuya) and some got a real laugh out of it (everyone else).

"Don't they look so beautiful together!" Exclaimed Yumichika, holding the paper out at arm's length to fully admire the pictures.

"Yumichika that's enough." I muttered, but he waved away my objections.

"Rangiku-san, what do you think? Aren't they the most beautiful photogenic couple!" He twittered.

"Oh yes, wonderfully photogenic indeed!" Agreed Rangiku and I hissed in anger at her. "They look perfect even with their hair all mussed up and what not. Aw!"

I grabbed the offending paper out of Yumichika's hands, glared at the two twittering idiots and stalked off. Later Ikkaku, told me that Yumichika had pulled out another copy and they had continued with their gawking.

And yes, Ikkaku and Ichigo did fight.

"I'm doing it for you Haya!" Ikkaku had explained. "I wanna know that the asshole that dares to reduce my sister to a joke in Sereitei is at least strong, if nothing else!"

"Yes but you already know he's strong!" I had argued. "He's the freaking champion of the Winter War!"

"That was ages ago. He could have gone soft for all I know!" He had said before stalking off to find Ichigo and force him into a fight.

Ikkaku was just itching for a fight and Ichigo had given him a reason to challenge him to one. And so they fought and Ichigo pounded my dear aniki into the dust.

"I know I should feel sorry for you." I said as I looked down at Ikkaku moaning in pain. "But I don't, stupid dolt."

Ikkaku bared his teeth at me. "He defeated you the first time he came to Sereitei. What in the name of all things bald, beautiful and sugar coated had you planned to do?" I asked, but he had no answer and had simply looked away.

But after that it went right back to the way it used to be. Men – simple creatures really. There really was no problem so big that it could not be resolved with a few broken ribs, a black eye and a mild concussion. Morons.

As for Ichigo and myself, we strove to settle into our new roles as each others 'significant other', and first, we needed some ground rules.

"So you're _stipulating_ that I can't... wait, what was the stipulation again?" Ichigo asked looking confused.

"I'm stipulating that any physical transportation of Madarame Haya at the end of the workday shall be limited to when afore mentioned person is not otherwise engaged, and the stipulation shall be flouted at the perpetrator's own risk of being zapped." I said, repeating my stipulation.

"Uh… right." Ichigo said, glancing at me uncertainly. "And this is because?"

"'Cause it's a little ridiculous for you to keep carrying me off in the middle of my training sessions!"

"You're supposed to wind things up by then, that was our deal!"

"… and Taicho doesn't like it! You wanna fight him and miss out on sex for two weeks?"

"No…" He muttered sullenly. "Any other stipulations?"

"None at this time." I said, smiling at him sweetly.

"So can I make a stipulation now?" He asked, an evil glint coming into his eyes.

"You may… but it is subject to revision." I said carefully.

"Oh no Haya, you didn't allow me to revise any section of your stipulation so now you shall hear mine." He said inching across the bed, like a cat ready to pounce on its prey. "I stipulate…"

"Denied." I said firmly, trying to keep a straight face.

"What!" He squeaked. "You haven't even heard my stipulation yet! You might like this one Haya, hear me out."

I shook my head. "Denied."

"Oh fuck that!" He exclaimed, pouncing on me. "I don't need any fucking stipulations."

I squealed like a silly giddy girl as he lunged for me. Ichigo did that to me, he reduced me to a giggling, squealing, twittering fool and I loved him for it. Besides, I already knew what his stipulations were. "Don't stop kissing me." "No clothes while we're alone." "No sake unless you're licking it off me." Men!

But we weren't the only ones going through our period of adjustment, and although our voracious appetite for each other had been initially tolerated, the rumbling objections had begun a few days ago.

"We never see you anymore!" Rangiku exclaimed one evening, when Ichigo came to pick me up. "Ichigo, I forbid carrying off Haya tonight. Tonight you stay here and drink with us." She had pronounced with an air of finality, thumping her cup of sake down on the table for emphasis.

"You don't get to forbid anything." Ichigo said with a scowl.

The mob descended on him in a cloud of shouts and shaking fists and he quickly backed off. "Fine. Just for tonight."

I smiled up at my possessive lover, sweetly laying the blame for our absence at his feet, but Rukia wasn't about to let me get away with it.

"You're just as bad as he is, Haya!" She had exclaimed, an accusatory finger extended in my direction. "The days he doesn't abduct you, you abduct him. And don't even try to deny it, I've seen you do it!"

I grinned sheepishly. "First round's on us."

"And by 'us' I suppose you mean me?" Ichigo said with feigned peevishness. I leaned into him willingly as he snaked an arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer. "You, me, us… what's the difference darling?" I asked.

"Yeah, yeah." He said with a small smile. "I'm only your darling when I'm supporting your drinking habit. But there is that other time when I…"

I quickly laid a finger across his lips to shush him and he grinned back at me in mischievous delight. My guitar was quickly laid in my lap and the demands poured forth. Ichigo settled across from me, his eyes never leaving me.

The evening passed with endless rounds of drinks, jokes that went from lewd to morbid and songs that went from melodious to cacophonous. And through it all I had felt Ichigo's eyes roving over me, the heat of his gaze brought the blood to my face (and other regions) and it was all I could do to keep from dragging him into the dark alley behind the bar. I tried to calm my nerves with sake, but that had only made things worse. It all came to a head when Ichigo and I reached for the sake flask together, our fingers brushing against each other. He had looked at me across the table and I suppose he had seen his desire mirrored in my eyes because he reached across the table and got us out of there without another word.

Ichigo lost his haori and shihakusho to the wind that night, and I almost lost Inadzuma (he was not amused). He ripped my uniform off me as soon as we had stepped into his living room, and then practically pounced on me. I landed on the couch with a startled squeal, which only encouraged him further. He pinned my hands over my head and proceeded to caress and tease my already sensitive, hardened nipples.

"Ichigo, don't tease!" I moaned as I squirmed under him. I arched my back and let my breasts press up against him, hoping to distract him, but he only smiled lasciviously and laid a trail of wet kisses over my stomach, inching closer and closer to my sex.

I moaned in frustration and anticipation and he said, "I don't get to see you like this everyday, Haya. Forgive me, but I want to make this last." He kissed the inside of my thigh, dragging his tongue upwards, but stopping just short of my entrance. His hands moved down from my wrists, callused fingers trailing agonizingly over my skin and my hips bucked involuntarily. I buried my hands in his hair and pulled him back up, longing for the taste of his mouth and he complied, his tongue dipping into my mouth hungrily. My hands tightened in his hair, pulling him down towards me until me lay completely on top of me, his rock, hard member pressed against my stomach.

"Ichigo." I moaned against his lips, when I felt him start to pull away, "What?" I asked in a daze, but all I got was a small devious smile.

On moment I was looking up at him, the next I was lying face down. I gasped in surprise, but before I could even think of objecting he entered me in a single smooth stroke and I shrieked. He hooked his hands under my arms and pulled me back, until I was leaning against the wall of his hard, muscled chest, his member still buried deep inside me. He placed my hands around his neck and I entwined my fingers willingly.

He murmured my name as he kissed my neck, teeth scrapping gently against my skin and I shuddered. "You have no idea what watching you with that guitar does to me." He whispered in my ear, his hands moving slowly over me until they cupped my breasts. "No idea whatsoever."

"You have no idea what you do to me when you watch me." I whispered back, turning my head to gaze into his smoldering eyes. "No idea whatsoever…."

He smiled softly and leaned over to kiss me. His hands stroked and molded my breasts, callused fingertips brushing against my aching nipples until I was moaning and squirming against him helplessly. I tried to move away from him, urging him to take me, but he merely pinned me to him to his chest with one strong arm thrown around my waist while the other slide between my legs, stroking and caressing and touching me delicately until I was crying out my pleasure, moaning his name over and over again. I came again and again, and I shrieked until my throat was hoarse and the room began to spin around me. I slumped against him in a daze, only the hand around my waist holding me up.

Only then did he let go off me, dropping me onto my hands, hips moving against mine in a hard steady rhythm. His hands tightened on my waist and I heard him groan, the gravelly sound of his voice sending shivers up my spine and impossibly I felt myself being aroused again, my hips moving against his. He called out to me, murmuring my name over and over again, pounding into me, and pushing both of us closer and closer to our peaks. I gyrated my hips against his and I heard his breath hitch in his throat. He sped up, yielding control of his body completely to his passion. I came in a whirl of overpowering sensations that left me blind and aware of nothing except Ichigo as he shuddered above me and throbbed inside me.

I toppled forward, the intensity of my orgasm leaving me weak and light headed and I collapsed onto the couch in a disheveled heap, taking Ichigo down with me.

"So that's what I do to you?" I gasped, struggling to catch my breath.

"Yeah… no…" He muttered into my hair, his words coming in shaky gasps.

"Which is it?" I asked, turning over to look at him.

"It's a little of what you do to me… not everything." He panted, his eyes aglow with the promise of things to come.

"Kami…" I murmured, watching the perspiration roll down his face. "Provided I survive … this is going to be something, isn't it?"

He nodded slowly, a slow languorous smile creeping onto his lips. "Tomorrow's your day off, right?"

"Yeah…?"

"Well then Zaraki cannot complain if you don't make it in tomorrow." He said, rising from the couch. He stood beside me, looking down at me as I lay on his couch. I slowly stretched an arm out past my head and arched my back a little, drawing a knee up as I did. I knew the slow movements were flexing the muscles in my legs and emphasizing their lean length. I sighed and turned my head a little to give him a peek at my neck as well. "You like?" I asked.

"I like." He said, and the smile was replaced by a wild hunger.

I didn't make it to the 11th the next day.

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Hahahahahaa!!! One more lemon! :D And more to come!

Reviews pls.


	19. Chapter 18

Right, so where were we? Oh yes... I remember now (giggles)!!! Well... this chapter isn't as light as the last one. Little more emotion and blah blah.. I hope I got it all right. Enough said... read on and enjoy!!!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything other than my OC Haya! DAMN YOU KUBO!

I feel like a little Norah Jones today.... Anybody else feel like a little 'Sunrise'?

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**Chapter 18: Meet The Parents? **

"Haya!" I called, as I walked into my living room. "Haya?"

I was late. I was very, very late and I was a little scared of what Haya was going to do to me. Silence was never a good sign. I had promised her a long weekend away from everyone and everything. I had promised her a trip to the living world. But then Momo had brought forth the budget, and the Soutaicho had called a meeting and a few completely insane members of my division challenged some 11th Division Shinigami to a fight… and one thing had lead to another and I was late.

"Haya, I'm sorry. I swear I tried to get here as soon as I could…. Where are you?" I called as I quickly checked the kitchen and bedrooms. "Haya?" Had she gotten tired of waiting and left?

"Haya!" I called a little louder, a little more nervous. "Shimatta!" I stood in the middle of my living room, frustrated and enraged. "Haya, where are you?"

"Here." Came a soft voice from behind me.

I whirled around, but there was no one there. "Haya? Where?" I pleaded a little pathetically.

"I'm on your patio, you big dummy."

I barged out onto the patio, almost tearing through the shoji-doors in my haste. She watched me come to a careening halt before her, her eyes an unreadable midnight blue, her expression strangely disinterested. I gulped. "I'm sorry I'm late."

She continued to study me dispassionately. "Haya… I tried to get here as soon as I could. I really did!" I lowered myself onto a cushion in front of her, but maintained a healthy distance. Her eerie silence was unnerving. "Please say something."

And just like that she was laughing. Hands pressed to her lips to keep the dam from breaking, but the dam did break and the big guffaws spilled past her lips in gurgles. "You should see the look on your face!" She squealed, before becoming engulfed in another paroxysm of glee.

"Very funny." I said as sternly as I could, but I was just relieved to find her still waiting for me.

She was flushed and breathless by the time she got a hold of herself, and I inched a little closer. "I'm not gonna reduce you to a crisp." She said, holding out a hand to me. I grinned sheepishly and moved to sit beside her.

"What were you doing out here, if not plotting my torture?" I asked as she curled into my side.

"I like it out here. It's peaceful." She said with a soft sigh. "So… what happened?"

"You're fellow division members happened." She chuckled softly, looking up at me with amusement written all over her face.

"What did they do this time?"

"Tore down one of the barrack buildings and put close to 15 people in the 4th. Unohana gave me an earful." She laughed soundless into my chest, hiding her delighted grin from me. She knew it would annoy me. "It's not funny Haya. You're the 4th Seat, can't you do something?"

She pulled away a little to look up at me, a smile lingering on her lips. "It's tradition Ichigo. I can't mess with tradition."

"It's not tradition!"

"Yes it is." She said quickly, interrupting my tirade. "There are two things you can always rely on the 11th for: fighting and troublemaking. And for the most part, we combine the two."

"Why can't you do just the fighting?"

"'Cause that would be even more destructive than it is now, and wouldn't be half as much fun."

I 'hmfed' and didn't respond. I pulled her closer and she leaned into me willingly. "How bad?"

"Had to re-do the budget kind of bad." I muttered.

She kissed the angle of my jaw. "I'm sorry."

I sighed and looked down at the beautiful woman in my arms. "Yeah, I am too. I'm sorry I ruined our plans. It's not too late y'know, we can still go."

She shrugged nonchalantly. "Can we stay here instead?" That shrug had been a little too nonchalant.

"Sure we can…. But weren't you looking forward to going to the living world? I thought you liked visiting the living world?" I asked slowly, but all I got was a cryptic silence. "Haya, what's going on?"

She slowly turned her fathomless eyes up to meet mine. She was nibbling on the inside of her lip. I ran my thumb along her lips. "What's wrong?"

She looked away and cuddled closer into my side. "Is it alright if we wait until Christmas to visit your family?"

Ah. No wonder she didn't care that I was late. She was _glad_ that I was late! "If you didn't want to go, all you needed to do was say so Haya." I said angrily. I couldn't believe she hadn't told me this sooner!

"Ichigo, it's not like that…" She said, her fingers tightening into my shihakusho, but I moved away from her and got to my feet. I suddenly needed the space, I needed to be looking at her while she told me about her misgivings about our relationship.

"Ichigo please..." She pleaded as she scrambled up as well, with one out stretched hand held out to me. I glared at her and refused to take her hand. She slowly lowered her hand; her eyes slowly went back to being disinterested and the hurt lines on her face smoothed out into a mask of indifference. She was hiding from me, but at that moment, I wasn't feeling forgiving enough to focus on her pain.

I did not take the idea of subjecting us to the insanity of my family lightly. It was a big deal, it was a very big deal. Karin was as brash and blunt as Yuzu was sweet. You'd think it wouldn't be hard to manage, but they are polar opposites of each other and it is tricky keeping your guard up around Karin while letting Yuzu in at the same time. Yuzu expects her kindness to be reciprocated, while Karin would scoff at the idea of mollycoddled. Karin survived on sarcastic wit and had an evil sense of humor, while Yuzu would be mortally wounded by a similar jibe. And then of course, there was my father! Introducing her to them was a big deal, because not only were they completely nuts, my father would probably start naming our children the minute Haya walked through the door.

"This is precisely why I didn't say anything earlier." Said Haya softly, her eyes unreadable, her voice a tad cold.

"I'm not mad because you don't want to see them." I yelled. "I'm mad 'cause you didn't say anything earlier! We planned this whole weekend weeks ago and you said nothing! If you didn't want to meet them, why didn't you say so earlier?" I was livid. Was my anger a little bit of an over reaction? In retrospect I'd have to say yes, but at that moment it was all I had. "I fought Ikkaku for you! I've met your surrogate family and played by all the rules they set down. Is it really asking for to much for you to meet my family?"

She looked away, her eyes watching the distant trees, her thoughts a million miles away. She was entirely closed off from me, unreadable and unreachable and it only infuriated me further.

"Aren't we good enough for you?" I growled. It was stupid of me and I regretted it almost immediately. Haya stiffened at my words, but she still didn't look at me. I reached for her instinctively and she took a step back as soon as I did.

"Haya…" I murmured. "I didn't mean that. I didn't." I took a step forward and she backed up again. "Haya please…" I pleaded, but she continued to move away until she backed into the railing. Her head was still turned away from me, and although I stood inches away from her she refused to acknowledge my presence. I cupped her cheek in the palm of my head, but she merely stood there; a stone cold statue. "Haya I'm sorry." I murmured as I leaned in to rub my nose against hers.

Her eyelids fluttered shut and a solitary tear rolled down her cheek and into my palm. "Haya…" I pleaded again, her pain was an open wound inside my chest, the knowledge that I had put it there a burning toxin threatening to kill me in minutes.

"You're right, I should have said something earlier." She murmured softly, her voice cold and impersonal. "I'm sorry Ichigo."

"No, I'm sorry." I tipped her chin up, hoping to look into her eyes, but she kep them firmly shut as if she couldn't bear to look at me. "Haya, please look at me!" I murmured. She shook free of my hold on her, but she couldn't really leave because I had her cornered.

"Move." She said softly.

"Where are you going?"

"That's none of your concern." She said, her eyes stubbornly focused on a distant point above my shoulder.

"It is my concern. It will always be my concern." I put my hands on her shoulders in what I thought was a reassuring gesture, "Haya I'm not letting you leave until you talk to me."

She shoved my hands away from her and her eyes moved up to meet mine. In them I saw her anger. Her outrage. "How dare you." She growled, and the speckles in her eyes began to spark and swirl. "You think you can keep me here?"

"Haya, that's not what I meant and you know it." I snapped.

"No, you wouldn't force me. But it was your executive decision and I am expected to comply with it, aren't I?" She snarled. "We're going to the living world. We will visit my family. You will stay until I'm done talking to you. All your decisions and the minute I refuse to comply, you lose your temper!"

I opened my mouth to object, but stopped when I realized that she was right. Her eyes were a glowing electric blue, and I could feel her reiatsu begin to crackle around her. "Haya…" I murmured, and I reached out for her again, but she shunpoed past me moving towards the patio door. I went after her because I didn't want her to leave in anger; I had meant it when I said I wouldn't let her go without talking to me first.

I wrapped my hands around her waist and pinned her to me, her back pressed into my chest.

"Let go!" She snarled, her hands pushing against mine fruitlessly.

"I don't want you to go Haya. I am not forcing you, I am pleading with you." I murmured in her ear and she ceased to struggle against me. A shuddering sigh escaped her lips and she sagged against me wearily.

"I can't do this with you Ichigo." She gasped, her breaths coming out in panicked pants. She shook her head slowly. "I just can't."

"What can't you do?" I asked anxiously.

"This… this fight. I can't do it. I'm incapable of arguing with you. I'll go with you to the living world." She said, her voice a soft choked sob.

I tried to turn her to face me, but she gripped the sleeves of my shihakusho in a panic. I kissed the top of her head and nuzzled the back of her neck. "I'm sorry I didn't ask if you wanted to go."

She didn't respond, but her head was still hung in dejection and defeat. I kissed her neck softly; I wasn't trying to distract her. I just wanted her to know that I wasn't angry anymore. "Haya I really am sorry. You're right, I should have asked. We'll meet them when you're ready. There's no rush."

She held still in my arms, her labored breathing evening out slowly. I tightened my hold on her, feeling like quite the asshole for everything I had said. Her hands slowly loosened their grip in my shihakusho and she laid them over mine. She leaned her head back against my shoulder and I kissed her temple. She sighed and turned a little to face me, and it was all the encouragement I needed. I kissed her luscious mouth, suckled on her bottom lip and tasted the saltiness of her pain. I broke away to look into her blue-black eyes. The speckles were back to being stardust in the midnight blue of her irises, and they now regarded me timidly.

"What if they hate me on sight Ichigo?" She murmured.

I turned her around and she came into my arms willingly. I kissed her softly, pulling her flush against me, savoring the feel of her warm body against mine, but as usual, the clothes were getting in the way. I knew we needed to talk, but I needed to feel her against me more. I pressed her to me, and shunpoed us into my bedroom.

I felt her hands curl around the lapels of my shihakusho well before I had even begun to command my hands to start on her garments. Her nimble fingers made quick work of my sash, while my own shaking hands only tightened the knot of hers. I felt her hands tug impatiently on my hair, a dissatisfied mewl sounding from her throat. I ripped her sash in two and tore the rest of her uniform from her body. A contented sigh feathered across my lips when she felt my hands wrap around her naked waist. I nudged her towards the bed and she broke the kiss as she moved backwards, lips parted and eyes hazed with passion, but watching my every moment like a tense cat.

I lunged at her hungrily and she squealed as she landed on the bed under me. I found her lips once more, sucking and nibbling until she was moaning into my mouth. Kami, I would never tire of her. The feel of her strong hands wrapped around my shoulders, fingers tugging on my hair, the heady scent of her skin filling my head until I couldn't tell you that 2 and 2 made 4.

I pushed a knee up between her thighs until I was pressed up against her. I groaned when my skin encountered the wet heat of her arousal and I thought I felt the throb of her pulsing desire. Or maybe I was only imaging that. Maybe I was the one throbbing; maybe it was the thrum of my desire that was pulsing through my skin. Her thighs tightened around mine and I groaned once more, when I felt her thigh brush against my throbbing member. I ached to take her right then, I wanted to bury myself in her tight heated sex, I wanted to hear the gasp that always escaped her lips when I did, I wanted to feel her clench around me at that initial intrusion. But not yet… not yet.

I felt her lips close around my ear lobe and I thought I wouldn't last very long. She sucked on it, and I groaned helplessly, drowning in my desire for her. "Haya…" She bit down gently and I _knew_ I wouldn't last very long. "Haya!"

I pulled out of her grasp and moved my lips onto her neck. I sucked and nibbled on all her favorite spots until she was writhing under me, moaning and calling my name. Her legs tightened around mine, heat flooding out from between her legs and this time I knew it was all her. I saved the juncture of her neck and shoulder for last. I bit down gently and she sighed. I sucked on her skin and I felt her hips buck. I moved my attention to the dip of her clavicle and she wriggled, moaning my name over and over again, an urgency creeping into her voice.

Time to move lower. Her perfect breasts were practically calling out to me, her hardened nipples begging for my attention. How could I possibly resist? My lips closed around one aching teat and I heard my Haya shriek. Her hips bucked and strained against my thigh, but I wasn't ready to give in just yet. Not yet. I sucked and teased until her back bowed, quivering as tight as a drawn bow.

"Ichigo... now. I need you right now!" She moaned and I couldn't hold back any longer. I drew back onto my knees, pulling her hips up to meet mine. I sank into her in one smooth thrust, our moans filling the air around us. I held still, savoring the moment. Her hips bucked against mine impatiently, her legs tightening around my hips and that small movement obliterated all coherent thought in my head. My hips moved of their own volition, my hands tightened on the smooth flawless mounds of her buttocks as I yanked her hips up to meet mine.

My eyes rolled back in my head as the warmth flooded in me, but what was that? My lover was calling out to me, her hand tugging on my arm impatiently. I looked down at her and she held out an open hand to me. She never looked more beautiful than she did in that moment; her hair strewn across the pillows, a wave of black, lips parted, eyes glazed over in passion, an out stretched warm begging me to finish in her arms. How could I possibly deny her?

I sank onto my elbows, and pulled her into my arms. She wrapped her legs around me; knees pulled up and pressing into my ribs. "Ichigo…" She moaned, her teeth sinking into my shoulder as she neared her peak. I pounded into her relentlessly, moving a hand to caress her thigh from knee to hip and I felt her tighten around me. She flung her head back as the pleasure wracked through her, wave upon wave of heat, pulsing through her until she was quivering in my arms. I felt that familiar coil of desire tighten, tighter and tighter, the sound of her moans kept me going, while the feel of her throbbing sheath around me convinced me that I would lose my mind if I kept this up any longer.

I felt her ankles press into the small of my back, urging me to go faster, deeper and I did. I would give her anything she wanted. She shrieked as another wave of pleasure flooded through her and this time I exploded with her. Detonations on par with supernovae exploded behind my eyes and for a while I was convinced I had lost both, my sight as well as my hearing. I was surrounded by blackness and could near nothing other than the sound of my blood pounding in my veins.

"Ichigo?" Called Haya, her hands slowing stroking my back. Ah, I could hear again!

"Yeah." I gasped. She turned to peer at me. And I could see again! My head had been jammed against the crook of her neck, my face pressed into the pillow beneath her head.

"You're awake. For a moment there I thought you'd passed out." She said with a soft chuckle.

"I don't pass out after sex."

"You sleep like the dead. It's the same thing." She was teasing me. I'd just given her multiple orgasms and she was teasing me.

"Next time you can do all the work." I said, and moved to roll off her but she held me in place.

"Stay." She murmured. Fine by me, I didn't want to move. Correction, I couldn't move.

I stayed in her arms, reveling in the warmth of her skin, the softness of her hair. "You should let your hair down more often." I said, running a hand through her inky black tresses.

"It annoys me." She said abruptly.

"I know it does. But either do as I ask or I'll make it a stuipulation." I rose up on an elbow to look down at her. She glared back at me.

"I don't like you." She said, lips pulling into a pout.

"That's ok. I love you enough for the both of us." I kissed her softly on the lips before moving to lie beside her. She chuckled softly against my mouth. "I loved you the moment I saw you." I said between my kisses.

"No you didn't." She said as she tugged on my hair and brought my eyes up to meet hers. "Not the first time you saw me."

"Alright… second. But it was the first time I saw you up close and personal." I said, recalling the first time I had seen her spar with Ikkaku. The sight of her fluid movements had been a kick in the gut.

"Your orange hair was the last thing I saw before I passed out." She said smiling.

"What?" I asked in confusion. "Oh the _first_ time. Yeah… I thought you were completely crazy that day."

She grinned up at me in glee. "I was… still am. Wouldn't you agree?"

"I agree." I said and pulled her on top of me. "But a nice kind of crazy, a good crazy."

She giggled as she looked down at me. I stayed watching her for the longest time, and when her smile slowly died away I knew she was thinking of our earliler conversation.

"They won't hate you on sight Haya." I said, tilting her chin up to look in her eyes. "You have no idea how excited my father will be to see you."

"Won't he be a little disappointed?" She asked softly.

"What? Why?" Where were these questions coming from?

"Didn't he used to call Rukia his third daughter?"

I sighed. "Yes he did, but you haven't met him or you would know not to take anything he says or does seriously. My sisters have always known that Rukia and I were never more than good friends. And they will love you."

She looked at me doubtfully, so I continued. "Karin will love your sarcasm, she will love your 'mess with me and I'll fry your manhood' attitude. Yuzu will love the fact that you cook and if anyone can get that sweet side of you to make an appearance, it will be Yuzu."

"I'm not sweet!" She said hotly. Accuse of her castration and she has no objections, but call her sweet…. Kami, I was really crazy about this woman.

I shook my head in amusement and kissed her again. "They will love you Haya. Don't worry about it. So will Inoue and Ishida."

"You still call her Inoue? Isn't she married to Uryuu?" She asked as she settled into the crook of my arm, pulling the covers over both of us.

"She will always be Inoue to me." I said as I drifted off to sleep. "I've known her as Inoue for too long to call her anything else."

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"Nemu!" He screamed, as he usually did. "Where are you, you stupid whore!"

"Here, Mayuri-sama." I replied. "I have the analysis you had asked for."

"Then why are you wasting my time?" He screamed, his face almost beginning to match his hair in their blueness. "GET ON WITH IT."

"There have been rumors circulating in Sereitei about an impending meeting between the Kurosaki's and Madarame Haya…"

"And how is this relevant, you incompetent wretch?" Snarled my captain. "I have no interest in rumors! I am a scientist! I deal in facts, and experiments and evidence!"

"And it is safe to assume that he will be also introducing her to his childhood friends, Ishida Uryuu and Orihime as they still continue to reside in the same town." I continued, feigning imperviousness to his relentless insults. Was I hurt? The man is my father, need I say more?

"And?" He asked, his eyes narrowing as he began to see the possibilities.

"And Ishida Orihime continues to exhibit signs of her infactuation with Ichigo. She continues to take great pains to stay in touch with Kurosaki Ichigo and often sends him little presents and gifts through Shinigami posted in Karakura. It has been over 2 decades but she continues to be enamored by him, and I am certain that time has not healed her wounded heart. She will only need a gently nudge to believe that the only thing standing in her way is Madarame Haya." The words that sounded from my lips pained me. I did not dislike Madarame Haya. Far from it. I respected her. She was kind to me, treated me like a person while others looked down on me for being an aritifical creation, a robot, a monstrosity that aided Kurotsuchi Mayuri in his devious endeavors.

"Now I remember why I created you Nemu..." He said thoughtfully. "But who shall we use to deliver this proposition? You and your cold face and statistical factoids would never do!"

I ignored his taunts as I had learned to do years ago, and instead focused on betraying one of the few people that had been kind to me in all the decades of my existence.

"May I suggest Tsubokura Rin?" I said as softly and dispassionately as possible, burying my guilt under a false appearance of disinterest and calm.

Haya-san… forgive me.

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Oh no!! What are the Kurotsuchi's planning now?!

Well, next time we shall we introduced to our very own deranged villainess.... Orihime!!! And her very own special brand of madness!

Warning: I really do hate Orihime so I'm going to be painting her in a not so flattering light. Consider yourselves truly warned.

Reviews pls... anonymous or otherwise. I love hearing from you and I'm very open to criticism.

Special thanks to my biggest fans RainDrops and shadowgouf!!! I love you guys!!!!! ( if you didn't already know.... )


	20. Chapter 19

Ok.... :D I promised I would bring out loony Orihime and I have!!!!

RainDrops, Shadowgouf... this one is for you guys! :D

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**Chapter 19: The Kurosakis **

Despite Ichigo's repeated assurances over the months that followed our first big fight, I was still nervous. Yes it was our first big argument, because fighting over the last brownie crumb doesn't count and neither does the stipulations. Although I have to say, formulating the stipulations was a load of fun, but that's not important right now. Can we please focus on my current situation?

Kurosaki Isshin… _the_ Kurosaki Isshin. Father of Kurosaki Ichigo, former captain of the Gotei, a.k.a Goat-face. Kami, save me. What was I going to say to them? Hello, I'm the girl your son (and brother) has been screwing for the last year or so? Hello, I'm the infamous sparker from Sereitei? Hey there! I'm the one that lost control of my reiatsu in a fight and almost killed my Taicho! Oh and I'm in the 11th Division….

I prayed that day. I prayed for a horrendous hollow attack, I prayed for my division members to reduce two-thirds of Sereitei to rubble, I prayed for at least Yachiru to throw a fit of some sort and delay our departure. But for some unknown reason, the hollows decided to give us an easy time around the holidays, my division members decided to behave as mildly as lambs and Yachiru just gave me her best smile and sent me on my way to face my doom.

"It's not going to be half as bad as you think." Rangiku whispered in my ear as she hugged me one last time.

"So you keep telling me." I muttered.

"He's more perverted than scary. You'll be fine." She said patting my shoulder.

"Yeah and I can't exactly threaten to fry his balls Rangiku."

She clamped a hand down over her mouth and laughed soundlessly, glancing towards Ichigo. "I would pay to see this Haya!" She gurgled.

"Ran you're not helping." I pointed out, becoming thoroughly irritated.

"I know, I know!" She said calming down slowly. "I'm sorry, but don't worry about Isshin. Ichigo will take care of him."

"And the sisters?"

"Yuzu is a sweetheart. Karin… you might have to work on getting on her good side." She said thoughtfully. "You'll do fine! Don't worry."

"Hmm." I said skeptically.

"Haya, they're opening the senkaimon." Called Ichigo and I turned to him with a soft sigh.

"Pray for me Ran." I muttered as I walked to Ichigo's side, and just like that we left to visit his family in the living world.

Kami, save me…

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

"Ready?" I asked Haya, as I looked down at the beautiful woman beside me. She smiled hesitantly, tugging on the skirt of her dress consciously. I stilled her nervous hands. "You look beautiful."

And she did. Yoroichi and Kisuke had had a field day dressing us up, and shockingly at the end of it all I did not regret it. Yoroichi had outdone herself. Haya stood beside me in a slinky black dress, a dull goldy orange sash tied high around her waist, the rushed gossamer skirt skimming her knees. Large gold hoops swung from her ears and a single bangle framed her wrist. The stiletos had been a surprise. My lovely Haya in heels… I hadn't thought I would live long enough to see it.

And me? I was in a casual gray suit, the shirt a midnight blue that matched Haya's eyes. Was it mere coincidence that we were dressed in each others most distinctive colors? I assure you, there is no such when it comes to Yoroichi. The jacket fit a little too well, and although Haya assured me that it looked fantastic, it still made me want to shrug my shoulders every few minutes. But at least the soft leather loafers were comfortable. Comfortable shoes, who would have thought it possible.

"Ready." Haya murmured, smiling back up at me and I knocked on the door. I heard my father long before he reached us, as he thundered down the hallway no doubt hoping to kick me in the face. We glanced at each other as the door flung open and stepped aside to let my father fly out and land harmlessly in the front yard.

"Ichigo!" He grunted, "You are still my worthy son!"

"What are you doing, you stupid old goat!" I heard Karin yell from somewhere inside the house. "This is why he never comes to visit!"

"Hello Karin!" I took Haya's hand in mine and we stepped into the house. I deliberately shut the door and left my father out in the cold. The small reprieve would give me a chance to introduce Haya to my sisters.

"Ichigo-nii-san!" Yuzu exclaimed as she ran out of the kitchen in an apron that was covered in Santas, elves, reindeer and I think I spotted an Easter bunny, but I can't be sure. She came to a surprised halt when she saw Haya, her mouth in a small surprised 'o'.

"Yuzu, this is Madarame Haya." I said and Haya smiled gently, but my sister continued to look on in stunned surprise.

"Yuzu?" I said, giving her a small poke in the shoulder.

"Why has everyone chosen this particular Christmas to bring out all the surprises?" She said, her voice a small unhappy whimper.

"What? What are you talking about?" I said, utterly confused.

"Ichigoooooo! Let daddy in! I know you've got my daughter-in-law in there! Let daddy in Ichigoooo!" Sang my father, pounding on the door.

Haya glanced at me, a worried look painted across her features. Yuzu continued to look nervous and my father continued to bang on the door.

"Karin!" I yelled, hoping my sensible sister would be able to bring the house back under control.

"She is unwell Kurosaki Taicho." Came the cutting voice of Hitsugaya Toshiro. "Your yelling is not helping."

"Toshiro!" I exclaimed in surprise and watched the blood rush into the Taicho's annoyed face. "What are you doing here?"

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

"I came here to ask your father for your sister's hand in marriage." My handsome prince said in that stately tone of voice. Hitsugaya Toshiro, Taicho of the 10th Division, the man I had mistaken for a middle schooler over 20 years ago, the man who had played soccer with me.

"What?" Shouted my brother, looking thoroughly annoyed. What was he so annoyed about? He was here to introduce me to his girlfriend! How dare he be annoyed! "How long has this been going on?" He yelled angrily, stalking up to Toshiro.

"Since the first time we met Ichi-nii." I said and he started at the sound of my voice. "Karin…" He whispered, and I tried to look past the concern in his eyes, but I suppose I really did look terrible. Terminal illness can do that to you. But I didn't care. In less than a month I was going to be married to Toshiro and that's all I cared about. We had waited an eternity (the human version anyway…) for this, and finally it was time.

"What did you do to her?" Ichigo growled, his hands bunching into fists, his infamous temper making its way to the surface. But before he could do anything rash, the girl beside him reached out and touched his forearm. She touched him, she didn't hold him back, but it was enough to make my brother freeze. He turned to her and saw something in her face that calmed him.

"We need to talk Ichi-nii." I said, drawing his attention back to me.

"Damn straight we do." He muttered, glaring at Toshiro.

I turned to the girl. "I'm Karin, Ichigo's sister."

She nodded slowly in acknowledgment. "Madarame Haya."

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

"Yuzu-san, maybe you should let your father in." I suggested softly. She started as if she was waking from a dream and ran to the door.

Kursaki Isshin is a surprising man, because as loud as he was on the other side of the door, he didn't run his daughter over in an effort to plow into his son. He stepped around her carefully, moved into a position that gave him a clear view of Ichigo's turned back and launched himself.

I decided to trip him. Ichigo didn't need the added distraction and it would give us a chance to become acquainted. And so I did. I stuck one dainty stileto clad foot out just as he rushed past me and he landed unceremoniously on his face on the rug. "Oh Masaki!" He cried, dramatically as he rushed to the framed poster of his dead wife. "Even our newest daughter is picking on me."

I gave Ichigo one last pat on the arm and left to introduce myself to Kurosaki Isshin.

"I'm Madarame Haya." I said with my most dazzling smile. I had just tripped the man, it was the least I could do.

He grinned at me and engulfed me in an embrace that knocked the wind out of me. "Finally Masaki! I have my third daughter!" He whirled me around until I wass facing the poster. "Isn't she wonderful? Our son inherited my flawless taste in women!"

"Let go of her Goat-face!" Growled Ichigo, before knocking Isshin's hands off my shoulders.

"Masaki! Our son is so cold to me!" Wailed Isshin before the poster, and I watched Ichigo's face take on a scary shade of purple. I grabbed his hand and tugged him through the nearest open door, which happened to lead to the kitchen.

"Ichigo." I murmured, laying a hand on his cheek, forcing him to look at me. "This is not the end of the world."

"Toshiro… that little bastard!" Rasped Ichigo angrily. "That little twerp has been with my sister for over 2 decades!"

"And he's here now asking to marry your sister. Remember how people found out about us?" I said, reminding him our fiasco. That calmed him down a little. He sighed as he pulled me into his arms and nuzzled my neck.

"I still hate him." He muttered peevishly into my shoulder.

"Of course you do." I said, running a hand through his orange hair. "But now go out there and talk to him like an adult." I kissed him softly, but was forced to pull back when I heard Isshin giggle from the doorway. Ichigo's hands clenched into fists and an angry snarl escaped his lips.

My hands tightened on the lapels of his jacket and Ichigo hesitated. He glanced at me and took one slow calming breath before stepping towards the door. "Toshiro!" He said, looking past his father to the white haired Taicho. "We need to talk."

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

Ichigo stalked out the kitchen, his anger contained but still brimming just under the surface.

"You're a surprising young woman Madarame Haya." Muttered my father as he watched Ichigo ushered Toshiro civilly to the living room. "Madarame…" He said turning to her. "Are you related to Madarame Ikkaku?"

"He's my adoptive brother. Loaned me his last name 'cause I couldn't remember mine." She said with a small smile. I took in the firm fighter's physique, the long flowing dark hair and the scars that marred the dainty perfection of her face. And then she turned her arresting dark eyes to me and I knew what had drawn my brother to her. I smiled wryly.

"We need to talk too Haya-san." I said and she nodded slowly, almost somber in her manner. I liked that. I liked it that she took my opinion of her seriously. I liked the fact that she cared. Ten points to Madarame Haya.

She excused herself politely from my father and followed me into my room. I sank onto the bed in an exhausted huff, while Haya looked on, a well-disguised look of concern on her face. Again, ten points. I dislike pity. It annoys me. I wasn't sad that I was going to die! Toshiro and I finally got to be together! I was getting married for crying out loud!

"How long?" She asked gently.

"No longer than a month." I said with a smile and she smiled with me. "So tell me about you and Ichi-nii, Haya-san."

"What would you like to know Karin-san?" She asked with a small shy smile.

"How did you two meet?"

"I was training to fight Zaraki Kenpachi. He had challenged me to a fight and Ichigo came to see how I was doing. We sparred, he showed me a thing or two." She shrugged like I was expected to guess the rest. "You?"

"He kept my soccer ball from rolling onto a busy street." I said and she smiled.

"How old were you?" She asked.

"About eleven." Her smile widened. "That's practically a fairy tale Karin-san." She said.

"Please…" I said sounding a little winded. I tired so quickly these days. Almost there, almost there! "Just call me Karin."

She poured me a glass of water from the jug that sat on my bedside table. "Alright. Karin." She said with a soft smile. No pity. Good.

"Have you planned out your wedding?" She asked softly.

"Oh yeah." I grinned. She got it. She really did. She really understood that this was the happiest time of my life. A hundred million points to Madarame Haya.

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

"Today was an exciting day, wasn't it my little Iruka?" I said, as I tucked my son into bed.

"Yes kaa-chan. I really liked Haya-chan." He chirped as he settled in and I gasped.

"Weren't you frightened at all?" I asked, even though I knew that very little scared my brave little boy. Of course, he wasn't scared. _I_ had been scared, but that was just silly old me! My dearest Iruka was scared of nothing and no one!

"No kaa-chan, I liked her. She had really good stories to tell, and I liked it when she smiled." He said with a thoughtful look on his kawaii little face.

"You liked it!" I exclaimed. "Didn't the way those scars twisted scare you Iruka-chan?" I asked in genuine surprise. I for one, had been appalled by the display. I honestly wished she wouldn't smile at all, but for some odd reason, Kurosaki-kun seemed to enjoy it and she did it often just for his sake.

"Didn't scare me kaa-chan." He said bravely. How like his father he was. Those courageous dark eyes, that serious little mouth! The only thing he had gotten from me was his light hair.

I smiled down at my amazing, little son. "You are so brave, my Iruka-chan. So brave."

"Tou-chan wasn't scared of her either." He said, before yawning sleepily. "But tou-chan isn't scared of anything!"

"No," I said as I brushed the hair off his forehead. "Tou-chan isn't scared of anything."

He was asleep in a matter of minutes and I softly closed the door behind me as I left his room.

"The little fellow asleep?" Asked my husband, as I stepped into the living room.

"Yes. He was quite tired after his exciting day." I sank down onto the couch beside. "Uryuu, he is such a brave little boy!"

"Of course he is." Replied my husband distractedly, as he continued to look over some papers.

"Uryuu I really mean that! And I'm not talking about the time when he so bravely killed the spider in the kitchen, I mean about today with… that girl! Haya-san." I persisted. Uryuu needed to appreciate his son's strengths. He hardly ever did!

"And what was so brave about that?" He asked, peering at me curiously. "She was just a girl."

"Just a girl Uryuu!" I exclaimed in shock. "I was so frightened when I saw her, but Iruka didn't even flinch! And just now before falling asleep he told me that he wasn't frightened of her at all! He said he liked her!"

"Of course he liked her. She spent the greater part of her visit amusing the boy. Why wouldn't he like her?" He said, continuing to peer at me strangely. Why didn't he see how amazing Iruka was?

"She frightened me Uryuu!" I whimpered, the memory of our first encounter creeping back into my mind. How could Kurosaki-kun not have mentioned such a deformity! He should have warned us!

Uryuu smiled at me gently as he pulled me closer to him. "Everything frightens you my little princess. But that's what I'm here for, aren't I?"

I nodded slowly as I curled into the warmth of my husband, my steadfast Uryuu. But my thoughts remained with Kurosaki-kun and his strange friend. Rin-san had been right, the girl really did need help. There really was something not quite right about her. It wasn't just her terrifying scars; after all, I had encountered Zaraki Kenpachi! I had even ridden on his shoulder! Mere scars did not frighten me. It was her eyes, her cold, cold eyes. Cold and empty. Rin-san had been right. He had said I would know what he meant when I saw her and I had! She needed help, my help! I had hesitated when he first approached me with the tiny vial, and his story of this troubled girl. A girl so dangerous that she almost killed Zaraki Kenpachi. And by accident too! But I hadn't believed it until I had seen it with my own eyes. Her helplessness, her emptiness.

And the scars. How strange they were. Rin-san had been right about that too! My healing abilities had done nothing for her! She had remained as deformed as ever! So it really did have something to do with repressed memories about a horrible past! If I could find a way to heal her mind, that would heal her body. And then she would be perfect for Kurosaki-kun.

Kurosaki-kun had been rather annoyed when I had asked if I could try to heal her. He is such a foolish boy sometimes! I was only doing it for him! I wouldn't wish that type of thing on any girl and I really did feel sorry for Haya-san, but more than anything else I wanted Kurosaki-kun to be happy and instead he had been angry!

But men are all the same. They never know what is good for them. I'm glad I took Rin-san's advice. I'm sure the medication will help Haya-san. But the real problem will be to find a reason for her to come visit again….

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

Shadowgouf, does she sound loony enough? I dunno if she sounds loony enough..... :D LOL!!!

And for the record, I don't hate Tsubokura Rin. He just fits in my story really well. Small, cute, harmless looking chap....

REVIEW PLEASE!!!!! I love to hear from you guys!!!

And thanks to all those that added me to their update lists (without reviewing :( ) !! I'm very flattered!! XD


	21. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: Today's disclaimer was supposed to be brought to you by either Shadowgouf or RainDrops. But they refused to work together and are currently arm wrestling for the honor. But it's late so I'm gonna go ahead and do it myself. I own nothing except my OC and my vivid imagination.

Tara turns to Shadowgouf and RainDrops in background. "How's it going kiddo?"

Shadowgouf: DON'T CALL ME KIDDO!

A moment of distraction followed by abject defeat at the hands of a girl.

RainDrops does victory jig: I WIN! I WIN! I WIN!!

Tara: Well I'm done with the disclaimer..... you can have a.... margarita instead.

RainDrops: SWEET!

Tara turns to Shadowgouf: You ok back there kiddo?

Shadowgouf: DON'T CALL ME KIDDO!!!

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Right.... so, Chapter 20. Enjoy!

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

**Chapter 20: Agitation **

"So," I said, settling down beside Haya at the 11th Division bar. It was still a little early and we had a little time before the rest of the gang joined us. "How did it go?"

She looked up wearily at me. "I was meeting Ichigo's family… I'll give you three chances to guess."

"Oh it couldn't have been that bad!" I said, as I waved to a waiter. "Tell me." I said once I'd placed our usual order of sake.

"Well… Isshin came flying through the door as soon as we knocked. Isn't he like 60 or something?" She asked looking incredulous. "But anyway, that was the least of our worries. Yuzu came to a complete halt as soon as she saw me and she didn't look altogether happy."

"Oh my…" I muttered, as I began to see why Haya looked so worn out. "And then what?"

"And then when Ichigo yelled for Karin, Hitsugaya Toshiro informed us that Karin wasn't feeling well."

"WHAT?" I shrieked. "My Taicho? My Toshiro?"

"Yes your Toshiro. They're getting married as soon as Karin kicks the bucket and comes up here."

"WHAT?" I shrieked once more.

Haya nodded. "Oh yeah. Clearly you and _your_ Toshiro have things to talk about."

"I knew it was a girl… but Toshiro and a girl…. Toshiro and Karin?" I mumbled in shock.

"Yes, very cute story and all, but it doesn't end there. Ran pay attention!" She said grabbing my shoulder, "Pay attention, there's more."

"More?" I asked fearfully.

"Yes. Isshin named our children after dinner. We're apparently having two girls and a boy." She said, her voice trailing off, her eyes wide and fearful. What had Isshin done!

"And?"

"And then Ichigo beat the crap out of him. Karin got really sick afterward and Toshiro started fussing and then Ichigo lost it, and Yuzu was flustered, and Isshin couldn't do anything to help Karin 'cause she is really, really sick! But that's not it…"

"What is?" I asked slowly, temporarily forgetting about Toshiro and Karin. Haya was beginning to look more and more distraught and agitated. "Haya, what happened? Tell me?"

"I met Uryuu and Inoue." She said softly, eyes pinned on the cup of sake before her. "She screamed when she saw me Ran. She screamed and covered her son's eyes to keep him from looking at me."

"She did what?" I exclaimed, aghast at her words. "Orihime?"

"Yes, _Orihime!_" Hissed Haya angrily, as she turned to face me. "It's all so fucking unbelievable isn't it? Sweet, kind _Orihime_. The _Orihime_ who can do no wrong, asked if she could try to heal me of my _deformity_! How do you like that?" She cried, her hands bunching into fists until her knuckles went completely white.

"Haya…" I said softly, reaching out to touch her shoulder.

"Ichigo thinks she's pregnant or on some funky medication." She said, spitting out the angry words. "He can't wrap his head around the fact that she just doesn't like me. That she was being mean because she could!" She turned to glare at me, her voice rising with every word, until she was almost screaming. She stopped suddenly; the loudness of her own voice seemed to startle her. "Are you going to tell me the same thing? That it doesn't _sound_ like her. That there is some _explanation _for all of it?"

I hesitated. What could I say? It really didn't sound like the Orihime I knew!

Haya shook her head sadly and stood up. "Haya, no wait! Talk to me!" I exclaimed, trying to think of something to say.

"There's nothing to talk about Ran." She said turning her midnight eyes towards me, eyes that I had seen displaying everything from anger to a coldness that rivaled Kuchiki. But that day her eyes held the depths of despair. "Nothing."

And she left.

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

I was flustered, shaky, anxious, tortured and couldn't sit still.

And so after I walked away from Rangiku and her lame excuses, I went for a run. So much nervous energy, so many thoughts running through my tiny head… so little time. So little time!

"_So little time for what Haya?" Asked Inadzuma, startling me in the process. "What has you so agitated?"_

"You know what has me agitated!" I sputtered angrily. I was angry. Did I mention angry earlier? Maybe I didn't. Well, if I didn't I'm mentioning it now. I was angry. Furious, enraged, seeing red, ANGRY!

"_Calm down Haya." Inadzuma said soothingly. "Stop for a moment, sit down. We need to talk."_

"Can't right now Inadzuma. Kinda busy here."

"_Haya…"_

"Not NOW!" I snapped. He left without another word. Wish he had stayed….

I ran, I swam, and then I ran some more. I fell onto my knees in exhausion but nothing would help. The anxiety stayed. The cold knot of fear grew into an all-encompassing terror.

"_Will you listen to me now?" Asked Inadzuma again and I hung my head in defeat._

"Yes…"

"_You have nothing to fear."_

"I don't?"

"_You don't." He said nodding slowly. "It matters not how big the torch she carries for him is… he, for whatever reason, loves you."_

"Why thank you, that is SO reassuring!" I snapped angrily. "Can't you can the sarcasm for once?"

"_You and I are one Haya." He said with a small smile. "Can you can the sarcasm?"_

I snarled at him angrily, because there was nothing I could say. He was right. As usual, the smug bastard. I hated him so much in that moment, I wanted to rip that smug smile…

"Inadzuma…" I murmured, as I struggled to control the mounting rage. And just like that, the realization that I couldn't control it, turned it all into a terror; a nameless dread, an unknown emotion and I was its victim. "What's happening to me Inadzuma?"

"_Jealousy?" He asked looking confused. "Envy?" _

But that wasn't it and the uncertain look on his face told me that he didn't really believe it either. I shook my head, urging him to continue.

"_Hurt by her cruel words?" _

Ppft! "Is that the best you can come up with?" I asked, breathing deeply. I had to stay calm at all costs. Whatever I did, I had to stay calm.

"_Go home Haya." He said softly. _

I nodded in agreement, still breathless, still scared…. But home sounded good. Familiar surroundings and familiar people. Ikkaku….

"Hai." I said as I picked myself off the ground and headed back to the 11th.

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

Something was bothering her. Something big. Haya usually had everything contained, all neat and tidy and never ever visible. But that evening, it was all very obvious in the defeated slump of her shoulders, the tired dragging of her feet and the lost, faraway look in her eyes. So very obvious, that I didn't need Yumichika to point it out to me.

And it wasn't just bothering her… it was sucking her dry. And it had all started after the trip to the living world.

I waved and she turned her feet in my direction. Literally. She stopped, she turned and then proceeded to walk towards me.

"Hey." I said as she sat down beside me.

"Hey." Came the tired, dejected response.

I waited for her to begin. It was clear she needed to talk, but she was struggling. She didn't seem to know where to begin.

"I thought you said they liked you." I prompted.

"They did… the Kurosakis did anyway." She replied, her voice a mere whisper.

"But?"

"The Ishidas… not so much." She said, with a slow shake of her head. "I'm being silly… it's nothing really. I haven't been sleeping well. I'm probably just tired."

The excuses seemed more for her own benefit than mine. What the fuck had Uryuu and Orihime done that had rattled her this bad? "What happened?" I asked.

"It's nothing Aniki." She said with a forced smile. "Nothing really… I'm just… being silly."

Aniki. She had called me Aniki. "Haya," I said firmly. "Tell me what happened."

The sternness in my voice startled her and she turned to look at me, her eyes surprised and wide with fear. "Nothing! Nothing happened!"

She was so… jumpy. Haya responded to almost everything with anger, serious threats were answered with rage laced with anticipation of a fight, but this…. This was fear. But of what?

I reached out and grabbed her arm. "Haya…" I said, intending to insist that she tell me the truth. But I was interrupted.

"Oi Haya! There you are!" Called Ichigo as he approached us. Initially, I was annoyed with his timing, but perhaps it was a good thing. Maybe she would tell him about whatever it was that was bothering her. The Ishidas were his friends after all. He was the one she _should_ be talking to.

"Ichigo." Haya murmured, with a small smile. She seemed relieved to see him. That's a good thing isn't it? They would sort it all out… right?

"Where have you been?" He asked as he sat down beside her. "I've been looking for you all over Sereitei."

"I went for a run." She said softly, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"You should have told me." He said, looking confused. He glanced across at me and I shrugged. What could I possibly tell him that he didn't already know? "Wanna get something to eat?" He asked her.

She shook her head. "No… I'm not hungry."

"What? Even after a workout?" He asked in surprise. He glanced at me again and I shrugged again. "Wanna just get out of here then?" He suggested softly. Smart guy. Go talk to her.

She nodded.

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

I held her tight against my side and shunpoed in the direction of my home. Haya leaned into my shoulder, her face buried in my shihakusho. She looked awful, and she never looked awful. She hadn't had a decent night's sleep every since we got back from the living world, which was almost a week ago.

"What's wrong Haya?" I asked for the thousandth time. "Why won't you tell me what's worrying you?"

Her hands tightened in my shihakusho, but she didn't say a word. I sighed, defeated by her silence. I assumed she wanted to save it for when we got home, and for while we weren't flying through the air. But as we neared the 5th Division officer's housing, her hold on me tightened, along with every muscle in her body. And when we did arrive at our destination, I had to all but pry her hands off my shihakusho.

"Haya, look at me please." I said, trying to peer into her face, but she stayed with her head against my shoulder and I didn't have the heart to move her away from me. I pulled her closer. "Please tell me what's wrong." I pleaded.

"I don't know what's wrong." She murmured, her voice a shaky whisper. "I really don't know what's wrong."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm…" She slowly looked up at me. "… pissed off with Orihime and I don't buy your excuses for her behavior." I started to object, but she held a finger against my lips before I could speak. "But none of that explains this… uncontrollable rage."

I cupped her cheek with one hand, to reassure her and to make sure that she couldn't turn away from me again. I needed to be looking at her, I needed to see her eyes. "I'm… scared Ichigo. I don't know what's going on." She murmured, her midnight eyes widening with her fear.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I asked.

"I figured I was just upset about the whole… mess." She said, looking confused. "But this is… more than that. It doesn't make sense to me. I don't get this… _emotional_ about anything!"

I nodded slowly. "I know." I pulled her closer, wrapping my arms around her slender frame. Maybe it had all been a little too much. Maybe meeting my train wreck of a family _and_ eccentric Orihime had been a little too much for my Haya. On a good day, it would have been a little overwhelming, but throw in Toshiro's surprise and Karin's illness…. Perhaps I had asked too much of her. My preoccupation with my sister's inpending death/wedding wasn't helping the situation either….

I gently pulled the chopsticks out of her hair, and watched as her hair unraveled. She complained softly against my shoulder, but quietened as soon as I sank my fingers into the inky blackness of her tresses, gently massaging her head. She snuggled into my chest, hands tightening around my waist, but I could feel the tenseness in her muscles slowly easing away.

I kissed the top of her head and she moaned softly, so I moved a little further down. Brow, eyes, cheek, nose, chin… I saved her enticing lips for last. I took it slow, easy, almost lazy, taking my time with every stroke and caress. I wanted to savor it all, I wanted to savor _her_.

"I love you…" I murmured, when we finally broke apart.

She smiled languorously. "I love you too." Her eyes were tired, but still beautiful. She looked exhausted but the sight of her still took my breath away. Our first encounter at Renji's indoor training hall had been over a year ago, but nothing had changed since then. If anything I loved her more now than I did then. We were good together… we were perfect.

"Move in with me." I murmured, as I kissed her gently.

I felt her lips pull into a smile, brushing against mine slowly in the process. "What's in it for me?" She asked seriously.

"Bigger closet space." I retorted.

"And?"

"Less travelling between here and the 11th." Talk about quick thinking!

"And?"

"Me beside you every morning." This would be the clincher!

"And?" She asked, her voice betraying nothing.

"Isn't that enough?" I asked exasperated by her endless demands.

"No…" she said with a soft soft sigh. "But it will have to do I suppose."

"Uh… right."

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

"Another toast to our Haya!" Exclaimed Shunsui, as he raised his cup of sake. "I wish you happiness Haya! And may you share everything with Ichigo, including the housework!"

Cheers and cackles went up from the crowd, while Haya glared at Shunsui. "We're not getting married Shunsui! I just moved in." She exclaimed.

"Well you're almost there." He said winking conspiratorially. "You just have to wear him down a bit! If you need advice ask my Nanao-chan. She'll tell you all about how she wore me down."

"If I remember right, it was you that wore Nanao down Shun." She said sweetly, after Nanao had whacked him with her fan.

Ukitake chuckled softly beside his pouting friend, and extended a hand out to her. "I think I'll settle for saying I'm happy for you both."

"Thank you Juu-san." She said, looking around at the large group of people that had congregated at the bar. "Ichigo said he would invite a _few _people out here for drinks. I didn't know he was inviting all of Sereitei."

"News travels fast in Sereitei!" I said. "Especially when it involves free sake."

"And you wouldn't know anything about how that happened, would you Ran?" She asked, scowling at me. I shrugged, grinning gleefully. "Not a clue Haya!"

She looked ready to argue, but was dragged off by Ichigo. Everybody wanted to talk, toast, and wish the happy couple everlasting happiness. Everybody also wanted to make sure that Ichigo really _was_ going to foot the bill. I hung back, knowing that I wouldn't get a chance to talk to Haya before the evening was done. And we did need to talk. Our last conversation had not ended well.

Time was moving in fast forward mode, or it seemed to me! First Haya comes back from the living world in a wild panic, along the way she lets me know (very undelicately) that my little Toshiro and Karin are getting married, and then she begins to rant about Orihime, and THEN she just turns up the next morning and tells me she's moving in with the Strawberry! What in Kami's name was going on!

"So she's really doing it? She's going to live with that fruit?" Rumbled Zaraki from beside me.

"Looks like it." I sighed. He grunted. "You ok with that? Her going away to live at the 5th?"

He shrugged. "It's her decision."

"How's Ikkaku taking it?" I asked, reaching for my sake cup.

"How do you think?" He chuckled and nodded in the direction of Yumichika and Ikkaku.

"My baby sister's all growed up!" Wailed Ikkaku between chugs straight from the flask of sake. "My little… little imouto!"

"Ikka cut it out." Haya growled as she approached the two 11th divison members. "Yumichika do something! He's embarrassing me!"

Yumichika shrugged. "What do you want me to do? He's upset that you're 'all growed up'!" He said with a small smile.

Haya snarled at Yumichika and leaned over to whisper to Ikkaku. Whatever she said, made him go as pale as a sheet and to drive her point in, she zapped him on the head.

"And that's just a warning… Pachinko." She muttered as Ikkaku held onto his head and wailed his sorrow a little louder.

Zaraki guffawed beside me and I shook my head reproachfully as she approached us. "Really Haya, you should be a little nicer to your Aniki."

"He's a moron." She muttered. "He won't remember any of it tomorrow anyway."

"I guess you're right." I said with a shrug. "So…" I drawled uncertainly, and she looked up sharply at the awkward tone of my voice. "I don't know if I said this earlier or not, and if I did I suppose it wouldn't be too terrible to say it again…"

"Ran…" She said softly, her 'no nonsense' tone forcing me to bring my perambulation to a halt.

"Congrats." I said with a small smile.

"Thanks." She replied, her eyes watching me carefully.

"I'm happy if you're happy Haya." I said softly, as I held her questioning gaze.

"I am happy." She replied a little coldly, her eyes narrowing just a tad.

"And that's good."

"Yes, good." She agreed, her voice a cold monotone. "But?"

"But?" I repeated, feigning surprise.

"I know there's a 'but' Ran, please don't treat me like an idiot." Her eyes never left mine; her cold, cold gaze bore into my head, into my thoughts and I sighed in defeat. There was no easy way to say any of this.

"I just don't want you to rush into anything…"

"And what makes you think I'm rushing Ran?" She asked, interrupting me well before I would have preferred.

"Because less than 24 hours ago, we were sitting not too far from here discussing your rather disturbing visit to the living world…"

"Disturbing?" She exclaimed. "Was the visit disturbing, or do you think I'm the one that's 'disturbed'?"

"Haya, I …"

"Yes what?" She asked angrily, again interrupting me mid-sentence. I held her smouldering gaze for a moment. "I believe you. I believed you yesterday, I believe you today." I said quietly.

She continued to look at me; her anger slowly seeped away to finally leave behind the distilled dregs of her uncertainity. "And?" She asked slowly.

"And I'm just wondering if this big… 'move' is an attempt to temporarily bury your misgivings under all of this… joy."

"You make 'joy' sound like a disease." She said softly, her eyes strayed to Zaraki for a moment. "Everyone here is happy for me. Why is it so hard for you Ran?"

"As I said Haya, if you're happy I'm happy. But yesterday you were a rattled mess, and today you're… it's like it never happened Haya, but it did." She looked away, her eyes seeking out Ichigo in the crowd. I touched her shoulder and she glanced at me from the corner of her eye. "I just… worry about you sometimes."

"I know." She said softly, turning to face Zaraki and me once more. "But I'm alright." She looked up at Zaraki. "We're alright. We'll work it out."

She smiled uncertainly at me, as I pulled her into a hug. "I'm on your side Haya."

"I know." She whispered in my ear.

"Remember that…"

"I will." She murmured, before leaving to look for Ichigo.

"You really don't like this. Why?" Rumbled Zaraki from beside me.

"Because this move in thing is Ichigo's way of 'fixing' the situation. But it isn't going to work." I said with a soft sigh. "Why are you men such idiots?"

Zaraki's eyes narrowed as he waited for me to continue. "He wasn't the one who fucked up, Orihime did. And pretending that she didn't isn't helping Haya. Besides… this whole thing feels a little rushed. Don't you think so?"

Zaraki shrugged. "What do I know… I'm just another idiot." He grumbled.

I sighed. Had I really expected any help?

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

A month into our new living arrangements and she still wasn't sleeping well. She tossed and turned into the wee hours of the morning, leaving both of us exhausted, restless and cranky. The newbies at the 11th faced the bulk of her wrath and Momo unfortunately, was the one to face mine. The situation was intractable to begin with, and the fact that I had no idea how to help her only made things worse. And then one night she decided she wanted to sleep on the living room couch.

"I'll take the couch." She said, glancing at me across the dinner table.

"Why?"

""Cause you need the sleep." She said softly, judiciously studying a knarl in the wooden surface of the table.

"Alright we'll try the couch." I said. "It's smaller than the bed and I don't see how it will help, but if it's what you want, it's what we'll try."

"Ichigo that's not what I meant." She murmured, her eyes cold and distant.

"I don't care what you meant." I growled angrily. "If you stay out here then so do I."

"Ichigo…"

"Haya don't even say it!" I snapped, my angry finding it's way to the surface rather easily. "Today it's the couch, tomorrow you'll want to move back to the 11th. I'm not going to stand by idly while you slowly decide to leave me!"

"Ichigo, I'm not leaving you!" She exclaimed. "I just don't see why you shouldn't sleep because I can't!"

"And what makes you think I could sleep knowing you're out here?" _Alone, cold, dreaming nightmares that you can't remember once you wake up._ But I didn't say any of that out loud. I didn't need to. I reached for her hand. "It's not your tossing and turning that keeps me awake Haya."

Her hand was limp in mine and she continued to study the table. I stepped around to her chair, keeping a firm grasp on her hand. I kneeled beside her so I could look at her, and she slowly turned to face me. Dark tired circles rimmed red blood shot eyes, and her beautiful breath-taking lips sagged into an unhappy frown. "Haya… I…" I started, my voice trailing out into silence as I ran out of words to explain.

She nodded slowly, her hand slowly tightening on mine. "Arigato." She murmured.

"Haya please… don't thank me." I murmured, reaching out to stroke her cheek. "That's just plain insulting."

"Sorry."

I shook my head. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. Words of gratitude and apology… it wasn't supposed to be like this. I asked her to move in because I thought it would make things better but, I was left with the unhappy realization that maybe I had made things worse. I picked her up gently and moved towards the bedroom.

But I wasn't about to give up. I would never give up on us… or my Haya. Whatever this was, we would get past it. And then we'd pick up where we left off and be ecstatically happy as planned.

She curled into my side as soon as I lay down beside her, her nose tucked tight into my shoulder, her fingers tightening on my bicep. I kissed her hair softly, willing her to relax, willing her to fall asleep.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. We were supposed to be happy. Our life together ought to have been amazing. She wasn't supposed to be lying next to me, tense and frightened. She should have been happy, secure and sound asleep… but she wasn't.

She shouldn't have woken up screaming in terror in the middle of the night… but she did.

XxX------------------------------------------------XxX---------------------------------------------------------XxX

Much angst and terror and .... stuff to come. :D

So who else is a little annoyed with Ichigo's myopia? I wrote this chapter and annoyed myself in the process! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!

Big shout out to my reviewers and those of you that have added this story to favorites/update. Thank you all. And don't forget to review!

PS: Do check out RainDrops and Shadowgouf. RainDrops even has a very nice, totally yummy Byakuya story going on. So do check that out.


	22. Chapter 21

I know it's been a really long time and I'm sorry. But let's get on with the story shall we?

Big shout out and thank you's to all my readers. RainDrops, Shadowgouf, Musicfreak, LogicOfFire…. If I've missed anyone out I'm sorry. It's 5am.

I found a new band I like … Owl City. Feel good music, y'know?

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**Chapter 21: Dreamscapes**

It was so dark that it was almost like I was running through black velvet. I was running through the black fibres, as they wound around me, trapping me further within their inky depths. Cold, dark, dank tendrils curled around me as I struggled to evade them. I crisscrossed through them haphazardly, ducking and weaving and turning but I had no idea where I was going. I was running blind, but they knew where I was. _They_ could see me. _They _could hear my hoarse breath. _They_ could taste my fear.

A wet coil flung itself around my ankle, sending me sprawling onto the ground. I heard the nameless, faceless, ethereal creature chuckle and I struggled to get to my feet. But the tendrils were faster than I was and they had me in an iron hold very, very quickly.

I struggled with all my strength, but the tendrils were sucking the strength out of me, making my movements sluggish and slow. They wound around my ribs, tightening slowly, forcing the air out of my lungs; my head felt heavy, my breathing shallow. Every exhalation gave them the chance to get a little tighter… tighter… tighter.

I gasped soundlessly, my heart pounding in a rising panic until it was the only sound I could hear; pounding, pounding relentlessly in my head. But I was glad for it. I was still alive... but for how long?

"Haya…" it growled. "Did you really think you would get away from me?"

I continued to struggle, twisting and turning against the tightening, winding coils. Their cold, unforgiving length rasped against my skin, reminding me of scales and I squirmed in panic. I could feel a single tendril slowly making it's way up to my face and I turned my face away, craning my neck as far as it would go. _If it creeps up my face I'm done for_. It was an irrational thought, but it was an overwhelming irrational thought and I squirmed with renewed vigor as it slowly, but surely made it's way towards my cheek.

"No…" I murmured hoarsely. "No…" I growled with my last, rasping breath. "No!" I cried again, struggling against the cold, dank, scaly arms that held me down.

"NO!" I screamed, as it they tightened around me, and the tendril around my neck began to tighten. The tip coursed its way up my cheek until it was in my hair and I screamed again. I screamed with my last breath, I screamed until I could scream no more. I screamed until I felt someone shaking me lose from the death grip of the monster, the cold, scaly arms of the nameless beast.

"Haya!" Called Ichigo, again and again and I struggled to open my eyes. "Haya, please WAKE UP!" He screamed and I struggled to move but I couldn't.

"HAYA!" He screamed, as he shook me violently by the shoulders. My eyes snapped open and the air rushed into my lungs in a loud, rushing gulp. I clung to him weakly as I struggled to breathe.

I held on for dear life, listening to him murmur my name over and over again. "Haya…"

XxX-------------------------------------XxX-------------------------------------------XxX

She was screaming and my heart skipped a beat at the horrifying sound of her fear. I shook her by the shoulder in an attempt to wake her, but she was trapped and I couldn't reach her. I shook her a little harder. "Haya! Wake up!" I screamed. But she didn't wake up, she just became still. I shook her harder, my worst fears making my movements jerky and hard. She was limp in my arms and I couldn't sense a heart beat.

"HAYA!" I screamed, shaking her violently. "WAKE UP!" I gripped her by the shoulders and lifted her off the bed, screaming at her while I tried to wake her, but it was useless. She was still limp in my arms, with her head lolling backwards. I was beginning to panic with every passing moment. Should I send a hell butterfly to Retsu-san? Should I try to get her to the 4th myself? CPR?

But then, her eyes snapped open and she was awake, frantically drawing desperate gulps of air into her lungs. She had stopped breathing… Kami, she really had stopped breathing.

"Ichigo!" She gasped as her fearful eyes slowly focused on me, filling with tears that threatened to spill down her cheeks.

"It's alright." I murmured, pulling her closer. "You're alright."

Shuddering breaths gave way to tears, her shoulders heaving with the sobs that wracked through her body, her hands tightening on my shoulder and bicep, her nails leaving behind little red half-moons, her tears streaming down my chest until they had soaked the waistband of my pajamas.

I held her, trying to calm her, trying to calm myself.

What the hell was going on?

XxX-------------------------------------XxX-------------------------------------------XxX

Kurosaki Ichigo was in my office. Again.

"And to what do I owe this honor Kurosaki Taicho?" I asked stiffly, hoping that my tone would indicate my displeasure at his arrival.

"What? I can't stop by to see you Byakuya?" He asked looking mildly annoyed, but sat down anyway. I sighed inwardly. My polite cultured hints always bounced off his armor of congenital stupidity, I don't even know why I tried anymore.

He rubbed a hand over tired eyes and I sighed inwardly again. It was the girl again, and as much as I delighted in the thought of Kurosaki's despair, I did not want to hear about it.

"Byakuya…" He started, but I held an impatient hand up, cutting him off mid-sentence. Yes, I know, terribly rude. But it had been a hard day and I was in no mood to listen to the man's trivial concerns.

"Kurosaki-san, you must forgive me if I cannot listen to the latest update on your tumultuous love life…"

"Byakuya, she woke up screaming last night. Again." He said, completely ignoring my raised hand and me. "She can't sleep, she barely sleeps at all! And I don't know what to do Byakuya."

"You should go talk to Unohana Taicho. This is something she would be better equipped to help…"

"She won't go." He said cutting me off again. I was beginning to become extremely irritable. "She won't listen to me. She won't let me help her! Not that I know how to, but I think we should talk to Retsu-san, but she's impossible!" He held his head in his hands in the most pathetic gesture and I caved. One mildly sordid story and I was all ears. And people call me cold….

"The girl is as frightened by all of this as you are. Surely you can see that it is her fear that keeps her from going with you to the 4th." I said sensibly, but he merely shook his head.

"She can't remember any of the dreams. Not a single detail. I understand her hesitance because I don't know what we would tell Retsu-san either." He murmured softly. "But I have to do something Byakuya…. I can't … I can't bear to see her like this."

Kami, was he going to cry in my office? I stoically looked out the window and let him gather his wits along with the last shreds of his dignity. Peasants and their 'wear your heart on your sleeve' attitude! Listen to a man whine like a young girl day after day and then tell me you wouldn't prefer a little stoic silence.

"Kurosaki-san." I said after a long pause. "Are you certain her nightmares are connected to your visit to the living world?"

"That's when they began." He replied.

"But they are not necessarily connected." I pointed out.

He shook his head in confusion. "Inoue was a little… harsh and it upset Haya, and I don't see what else it could be!"

I sighed again inwardly. On occasion, the idiocy of this man knew no bounds and lately, those occasions had become more frequent. Ishida Orihime had been heartless, not harsh. And night terrors that spanned a period of 2 months were not the result of a puny insult (something the girl had faced on a regular basis in Rukongai), but something much deeper. "Are you certain it has nothing to do with the manner of her death in the living world?" I asked slowly.

His eyes widened in shock. "You think her memories are returning!" He exclaimed. "But why now? What happened to bring this on?"

"Perhaps something in the living world triggered a memory?" How stupid was this man? Was I going to be expected to spell everything out? Next he'd be demanding billboards to accompany my explanations!

"But what could it have been? And why doesn't she remember?" He said, his usual scowl deepening.

"And this is why you should go to see Unohana Taicho instead of showing up here every other day." I said firmly.

"Oi Byakuya!" He said looking up suddenly. "You don't like me coming here?"

I took a deep breath and looked out the window.

"If I didn't know you better Byakuya, I'd think you wanted me to leave." He said with a small smirk, while settling back into a comfortable position on his cushion.

I sighed. Audibly.

XxX-------------------------------------XxX-------------------------------------------XxX

Unohana Taicho sighed, and I sighed with her. Our meetings were going nowhere as I had little to say. I understood her frustration and she had all of my empathy, but it didn't change the fact that I couldn't remember a damn thing about my dreams. Well… except the big black scaly nameless faceless monster and I wasn't willing to share that yet.

"Haya-san you must start telling me _something_ if you expect me to help you." Her voice was soft, but her eyes held a glint of frustration that scared me just a little.

"Unohana Taicho, if I could remember anything, _anything_ at all, I would tell you!" I exclaimed. _Anything that sounded sane, that is. _

And she sighed once more before leaning back in her chair, her eyes boring into my skull. "And the medication? Have they helped at all?"

"Sometimes they make me drowsy enough to fall asleep, but the nightmares usually wake me up and then sleep is impossible." I didn't like telling her that her medication wasn't working, but it wasn't. I didn't like telling her that her 'therapy' wasn't helping either, but what was I supposed to do? Reality bites. And in my case it wasn't nibbling, it was taking great big mouthfuls.

"You must try and remember Haya-san. Perhaps it would be easier to talk about what you remember right after you wake up. Perhaps you could try talking to Ichigo-san about anything you remember?" She suggested kindly.

I nodded stiffly. My insomnia was wearing Ichigo down and I wasn't sure how much he wanted to listen to me rant about sketchy crazy nightmares that didn't make sense, but scared me all the same. Not to mention that it would all probably be through a curtain of tears, which usually left me about as articulate as a frog with a lisp. "I'll… try Unohana Taicho."

And with a curt nod I was dismissed.

I plodded dejectedly back to the 11th, while trying very hard not to remember the helpless and frustrated look on Unohana Taicho's face. I concentrated instead on putting on foot in front of the other. _'1…2. 1…2. 1…2.' _I had no particular destination in mind, but I knew I had to keep moving.

As much as I _wanted _to remember more of the nightmares, I wondered if I really _needed_ to remember more. My nights were terrorized enough, did I really need to bring them into my waking hours as well?

"_Yes you do Haya." Said Inadzuma curtly._

"That's up for debate. What I really need is a distraction." I replied coolly.

"_Such as?" Asked Inadzuma dryly._

"Such as something that will keep me insanely busy from the break of dawn until after midnight, something grueling. And it shouldn't be difficult to find, I do live in a society of warriors. So what are my options?" I asked, feigning an expectation of help. "Whip the newbies into good enough shape to entertain Zaraki?"

"_I thought you were looking for something difficult to do." Remarked Inadzuma._

"That IS difficult!" I replied acidly.

"_No my dear, that's impossible."_

"Do you have any better ideas?"

"_How about working on your bankai?" He suggested, while looking me over. "You are looking a little worse for the wear, but that particular task just might be possible."_

"Of course it's possible!" I sputtered angrily. "But I'm looking for something that doesn't really involve me."

"_So let me get this straight." He said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "You want a grueling task that will be interesting and difficult and blah blah… and you want it to not involve you? So you want to be doing what exactly? Watching proceedings while munching on pop corn?"_

"No! I want to be involved, but I don't want to be at the center of it all. Bankai training will be all about me and will force me to think…"

"_Ah! Now I see your problem!" He interjected._

I chose to ignore him and continued. "… about my deepest darkest fears and I don't feel like doing that right now."

My candid statement brought him to a halt and he peered at me. _"Are you sure you're feeling alright?"_

"No Inadzuma, I'm not feeling alright. I haven't had a good night's sleep in months, or haven't you noticed?" I quipped irritably.

"_I noticed." He said with a slow nod. "Just didn't think it would be enough to turn you into this… self-aware person…"_

"Thank you Inadzuma." I replied smugly.

"…_who, for all her self-awareness is still too chicken to face her deepest darkest fears."_

"INADZUMA!"

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"You can't stop going to the 4th!" Ichigo said again, a little louder this time. "Retsu-san says you've made no progress whatsoever!"

"I don't HAVE to do anything Ichigo! I will stop going if I don't feel like going, alright?" Haya replied, also a little louder.

"Haya, please just this once, LISTEN to me!" He exclaimed as he pulled his orange hair into unruly spikes.

"How about you listen to me, just this once Ichigo?" Haya demanded angrily.

"Just this once? Are you kidding me? I always listen to you!"

"Yeah right! Like when?"

"Like the time when you asked me not to carry you off from the 11th."

"That doesn't count!"

"It does!"

"Does NOT!"

I shook my head wearily as I watched the two continue to argue. Haya had looked a little better after her visit with Unohana, but her decision to stop going had very quickly put a damper on things. But before Ikkaku or I could begin arguing with her, Ichigo had arrived and… they were now screaming at each other. I was seated all the way across the training grounds on the veranda of the 11th division barracks, but I could still hear them.

"I wish they wouldn't do that." Sighed Yumichika from behind me. "It is _so_ ugly!"

"And disturbing." I replied, as I nodded to Yumichika and Ikkaku as they settled down beside me.

"And irritating!" Grumbled Ikkaku. "Why won't she just continue seeing Unohana Taicho?"

"Because it makes her feel… weak." I explained.

"She can't sleep. She can't focus on a damn thing. She IS weak!" Exclaimed Ikkaku.

"Not physically you imbecile!" I said testily. "I meant it makes her feel weak emotionally!"

"Emo… what?" Asked Ikkaku, looking bewildered.

"Ikkaku if you had bad dreams and Taicho made you go talk to Unohana Taicho, what would you say?" Asked Yumichika in his best pedagogical tone.

"I'd be pissed that he felt the need to send me to the 4th and I would most probably not go." He replied instantaneously.

"Why?" Asked Yumichika.

""Cause if I went it would be like admitting that I'm crazy or something, and that I need… oh."

"I think he gets it." I said, as Yumichika grinned triumphantly. "Hai Rangiku-san, I do believe he does." Said Yumichika.

Ikkaku threw us an irritated glance, before turning to the warring couple. "Loony or not, she has to do _something_."

"I heard that Pachinko!" Yelled Haya from across the grounds. "Once I'm done with this orange-haired moron, I'm coming for you!"

"Who're you calling a moron?" Growled Ichigo, as he glared down at Haya.

"Do you see anyone else walking around looking like a freaking fruit?" Replied Haya with a small sardonic grin.

"I keep forgetting how nasty she can be when she puts her mind to it." Yumichika said with a small shudder.

"I heard that Feather-face!" Yelled Haya.

"Ha! You're on the list too, Yumichika!" Ikkaku grinned.

"Ichigo just shut up and come with me!" Snapped Haya as she grabbed his hand and tugged him in our direction.

"Wait! I'm not done talking to you! We were in the middle of a private discussion!" He exclaimed, as he stumbled along behind her. "Haya! MATTE!"

"There is no such thing as a private discussion in the middle of the 11th division training grounds and everyone needs to hear this, so please Ichigo. Just shut up." She said softly, her tone grave.

"_WE_ are not going to go talk to Retsu-san about anything. And _I _have decided not to continue wasting her time, is that understood?" She said firmly, slowing looking at each of us before turning to Ichigo.

"Everyone just needs to stop obsessing about this and just let it alone for a while. I need space, do you understand?" She asked again, peering at us all in turn before turning back to Ichigo. "I need something to take my mind of this mess. I need to stay busy and I need you guys to stop worrying and obsessing and irritating the crap outta me, got that?"

"I'm sorry if I irritated the crap out of you Haya, but do forgive me – I was just kinda worried." Said Ichigo sarcastically.

"Your sarcasm is counterproductive, Ichigo." Replied Haya coldly.

"And yous isn't?" He exclaimed angrily.

"Can we please focus on the issue at hand?" She asked irritably. "I think the discussion about my sarcasm can be saved for later." She turned to face Ikkaku, Yumichika and me again. "I'm serious about this. I don't wanna hear anymore about this, is that clear?"

"What exactly are you expecting us to do Haya?" Asked Ikkaku angrily. "Not care? Not worry? Have you taken a look at yourself lately?"

"He's right Haya-chan." Yumichika added slowly. "You're a shadow of your former self. I'm too scared to sneeze around you!"

"Any of you want to test my strength, you call me out to a fight." Haya growled, her eyes beginning to glow with her anger.

"That's not what I said Haya!" Ikkaku snapped. "Nobody here is questioning your physical strength."

"Just my mental stability, is that it?" Asked Haya icily, which left Ikkaku and the rest of us with no response.

"I get it." She continued, after a small pause. "I would say the same of any of you had the roles been reversed." She turned to leave, but paused to glance back at Ichigo. "I'll most probably be late. Don't wait up."

"Haya… !" He cried, as he stepped towards her to keep her from leaving, but she was gone in a flash. "… wait."

"She'll talk when she's ready Ichigo, just be patient." I said reassuringly.

"You and I both know, that day will never come."

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Reviews pls!!!!


	23. Chapter 22

Disclaimer: I sadly own nothing other than my OC Haya.

Sincere apologies to everyone who follows this story….. RainDrops, Shadowgouf, ByakuyasCherry, animeLover1993, gaararoks, ShatteredKunai, Nanes, theGrimAngel, Musicfreak25. I'm sorry I really am! Real life just keeps getting in the way of my writing! :D

If I missed out anyone's name in the list above please do forgive me!

On with the story!

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**Chapter 22: Distractions**

She hadn't been joking when she said she would be late, but I waited up anyway. Knowing that she was out there by herself, waging her personal war against an unseen enemy was all that was needed to keep me awake. Bottle the stuff and you have a replacement for caffeine. Can't you just see it?

'_Insomnia is a bottle! That's right! Completely natural, no side-effects and completely non-addictive! Why rely on coffee that leaves you feeling dehydrated and tired once it wears off when you can stay awake by giving your own troubles more thought?_

_Insomnia in a bottle! _

_P.S.: Consult your doctor before using 'Insomnia in a bottle'. People suffering from heart diseases can face some risks of cardiac arrest, and others with histories of mental illness can lapse into an incurable depression._

_But if you're a healthy individual, Insomnia in a bottle is for you!'_

I was clearly losing my mind sitting on that couch, but there was little to do. I had no way of finding her, and even if I did it would most likely result in another fight.

I settled back on the couch and gazed up at the ceiling, my mind wandering back to when it had all begun - the trip to the living world. My family… Inoue. That's when she had stopped smiling.

Inoue…. Could it really have been Inoue's reaction or was it something else as Byakuya had suggested? But what? And how was I supposed to find out? All Kurotsuchi had told us were the circumstances of her death in Tokyo. Little else was known about her. But souls got their memories back all the time and although the process is known to be scary, they're nothing like Haya's nightmares. If it really is memory-recall, it's one for the books! Besides, she can't actually remember any of it once she wakes up. Which is not how memory-recall works. So that means Byakuya is most likely wrong… which is unsettling because he is rarely wrong. But his theory makes no sense. It doesn't fit.

Back to the visit. Isshin, Karin, Yuzu… no. None of that unsettled her. She had been lovely… amazing. If anyone left that house traumatized it was I. Toshiro…. I still had a bone to pick with that twerp but it would have to wait.

Inoue and Ishida, and their son Iruka…. Inoue had been … heartless. Surprisingly so. But Inoue has always been a little spacey. She didn't have a mean bone in her body.

'_Will you let me try and heal your deformity?' She had asked. _

Heartless. Callous. But torturous?

I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes as the thoughts whirled through my head. I was getting nowhere. I was getting nowhere because I didn't want to be thinking about this, I wanted to see Haya. I wanted to hold her and talk to her and know that things were ok between us.

Kami Haya… why won't you come home?

XxX-XxX

I reluctantly made my way back home. Arguing with Ichigo always left me feeling… empty. A bitter taste in the mouth. And lately it's all we'd had. Arguments, impatient sighs, 'I'm going out, don't wait up'…. My insomnia had turned our home into a war zone. But I had my big plan chalked out. Now all I needed to do was sell Ichigo the idea.

I paused at the patio door. I slid it open an inch and peered in. He was on the couch, leaning forward with his forearms propped on his knees. I stayed still, watching him. Watching him torture himself. I knew what he was thinking…. He was wondering if the trip to the living world had been such a good idea. He was wondering if asking me to move in had been an even worse one. He was wondering if dear little Inoue's ridiculous comments had upset me enough to start giving me nightmares. Just the thought had me shaking with anger. Of all the possible things that could bother me, puny insults from a bimbo with double D-cups? _Are you fucking kidding me? _

I was working myself into a rage, steeling myself for the questioning look that I would undoubtedly get when he saw me. I hated that look in his eyes. I HATED it! Questioning and judgemental and accusatory, all at once. Where have you been? What have you been doing? Our current unhappy situation is entirely your fault. And now you've decided to quit going to see Retsu…. If we fall apart, it will be your fault….

Cold, unforgiving claws clenched around my heart. That's what guilt feels like – icy. It begins in your chest and slowly radiates down to your extremities. He was right. He always was. It was my fault. I was too weak to face my fears. I was far too scared to talk about my nightmares because it made me sound like a lunatic. I was… weak. And it was my fault… entirely.

I watched quietly as Ichigo leaned back on the couch, hands tightening in his hair, palms pressing into his eyes. No doubt his head was pounding…. Sleeplessness and worry often gave him killer headaches. The whole picture blurred a little as tears welled up in my eyes and I turned to leave. I couldn't stand to see him like this.

All my fault…. I promised myself that I would return when I had the courage to tell him everything. I paused before shunpoing away… where was I headed? But then…

"Haya… please don't go." Said Ichigo softly from behind me.

I had been spotted.

XxX-XxX

She was poised to run, trembling with indecision.

"Haya… please." I hoped she would stay. I needed her to stay. She was still turned away from me, but a small nearly imperceptible nod indicated her decision to stay… at least for now.

"Haya… I… I'm…" I struggled to explain myself, but the truth was I wasn't sure what I was trying to explain. I had been up waiting for her, but I hadn't really prepared myself for that eventuality. And now that she was there, right there before me, I had no idea what to say. "I… I waited up. I know you told me not to."

"I noticed." She glanced back at me over her shoulder.

"Is that why you were leaving? Because I waited?"

"Yes… no… I mean…" She wrapped her arms around herself defensively. "I don't want to do this. Not right now anyway. I don't have the strength to face your questions. I have no answers to give you."

"I didn't wait up for answers. I was waiting for you… to get home."

Her shoulders heaved as she took a deep breath. She stubbornly refused to look at me.

"Haya… come inside. You don't have to talk to me, you don't have to look at me. But please don't wander around Sereitei just 'cause you want to avoid me. I'll stay out of your way." I studied her for a moment before turning to go back inside.

"Ichigo…" She murmured. I turned back around, prepared to face her sarcasm or anger or… something. But I was truly unprepared when she flung herself into my arms and hid her tear stained face in my shihakusho. "Ichigo promise me one thing." She murmured between sobs. "Promise me you won't ever stay out of my way."

"I won't."

"I… I… haven't told you everything." She hiccupped through her tears. "But I will. I'm sorry… I did this to us. Ichigo I'm sorry…"

I tried to interrupt her but she was on a roll, and the cascade of apologies tumbled out. "Haya… no… don't say that." I murmured while I tried to calm her down. But she merely shook her head and continued. If she hadn't been in the process of apologizing for everything under the sun, I would have called it a tantrum. So I used every man's tried and tested method of getting his better half to shut up – I kissed her. And I think it sorted of stunned her, because she held really still for a while before she kissed me back. But I wasn't paying attention to her reaction… I was just enjoying the sensation of her soft mouth on mine. It had been so long since we'd really kissed. We'd kept the goodbye pecks going as some sort of line that would not be crossed, but they really didn't count….

She moaned softly and tipped her head back just a little, giving me deeper access. It was all the encouragement I needed. I delved, tasted, caressed and kissed the ever-living daylights out of her. Her eyes were a little glazed over once I was done. But then again I'm sure mine were too.

"I love you, Haya." I murmured as I gazed into her eyes.

And then she burst into tears.

Women confuse me. It's a problem if you don't say you love them, and it's a reason to cry if you do. I am not even going to pretend to get this. I find them to be walking talking contradictions that absolutely confound me on a daily basis. But I will admit that I usually like the challenge.

Usually…. But with Haya… her tears just drove me nuts. Her pain was… too painful to watch.

I picked her up and moved to our bedroom, while she continued to sob into my shoulder. Incoherent words intersparsed her sobs, words that I didn't even try to comprehend. I shushed her and tried to calm her down as best I could once I'd settled her under the covers.

"I have to tell you…" She mumbled over and over again.

"Yes… you can tell me. I'm right here. But you have to stop crying first." I said, but for all my efforts to put forth reasonable propositions I don't think she even heard me. She curled into my side, hands fisted in my shihakusho and it was a long while before she was willing to talk.

But she did talk. She wiped away the last of the tears, took one deep breath and began. She told me about the nightmares, to every last terrifying detail. She didn't pause or hesitate. She just told me everything like she was deliverying a report - someone else's story.

When she was done, she looked up at me. "That's it… all of it."

I nodded slowly. "So it's not memory recall."

She shook her head. "Nope. Not unless it's something that Unohana Taicho's never heard off. The archives don't have anything like this recorded either."

"You were at the archives?" I asked surprised.

"Yeah… why?"

"I was at the archives!"

She smiled. "Too bad we didn't bump into each other."

"Yeah." I smiled. "Too bad."

She chuckled, but whinced almost immediately. I pressed my fingertips into her forehead. "Does it hurt?"

She nodded weakly and rested her head on my chest. "Close your eyes." I murmured. "Get some rest."

She glanced at me hesitantly, before nodding slowly and burrowing under the covers. She fell asleep almost immediately, but I stayed awake.

I just wanted to hold her. I was so glad to have her back.

XxX-XxX

I felt… weightless. And warm. I was in a cloud. That had to be it. The proximity to the sun…. Or I could be dreaming.

I sighed and my opened my eyes slowly, dreading the end of the dream. I looked around the familiar bedroom. I was in bed. No surprise there, but there was something not quite right with my location. I wasn't lying on the edge of the bed, ready to spring out as soon as I awoke. Hell I wasn't even on my side of the bed!

I decided to investigate my pillow, which was incredibly harder than what I was used to. Ah, yes. Not a pillow, but Ichigo's chest. I held still, listening to the steady thump of his heart, the soft slow whoosh of his breathing. This was so much better than some stupid pillow!

I inched away slowly, careful not to move around too much. Ogling Ichigo was an activity that I had not indulged in a long, long time and I was glad for the opportunity. I have always found the sight of a man in repose to be a beautiful thing. And it never hurt when the man in question looked like Kurosaki Ichigo. His head was tipped away from me, but I could see that the perpetual scowl was gone. I resisted the urge to touch him between his eyes, where the furrow would have been and chose instead to continue with my perusal. I drank in the sight of his slightly parted lips, the strong column of his neck, wide strong shoulders and the hard wall that was his chest. He was all bone and muscle, a warrior and even in sleep he was an intimidating sight. It was like watching a Bengal tiger – scary but incredibly beautiful. So beautiful that you just had to reach out and touch….

"Keep looking at me like that I won't be able to contol myself." He murmured huskily, as he studied me through lidded eyes.

"Maybe I don't particularly care for your legendary self-control right now."

"The thought did occur to me, but I thought I'd check first." He said softly, as his arms tightened around me, pinning me to his side. I gasped as his tightening grip brought me flush against him. We were still clothed but the heat of his skin burned me. "Ichigo…" I murmured as I tipped my head backwards to look at him. Our lips were inches apart and I leaned forward, but he had other plans.

In an instant I was on my back, my arms pinned above my head. He forced a thigh between mine and I whimpered as he pinned me down to the mattress with his hips. I could feel his erection against my stomach and I arched off the bed until my breasts brushed against his chest.

He cursed under his breath. "Oh no Haya… I'm going to savor this." He murmured against my ear. "You're gonna hate every moment, but you're also gonna beg me to continue." His breath tickled my neck as he hovered over me. "You've seen nothing of my self-control, Haya…" He murmured as he laid one soft kiss on my neck. The growl of his husky voice was sending shivers down my spine and I struggled against his grip on my hands.

"Kami Ichigo let me touch you!" I moaned.

"No." He chuckled, his eyes held dark promises of untold pleasures to come and I gasped at the very thought of it. "Today… I touch you."

I watched helplessly as he moved his hand slowly to the sash of my uniform, tugging and untying with deliberate slow movements that made me want to scream.

"Ichigo…" I moaned impatiently.

"Shh." He murmured as he gazed down at me, his lips brushing against mine tantalizingly. "All in good time."

"Ichi…" I nearly screamed but he silenced me with a searing kiss. I moaned as his tongue darted between my lips, sliding against my own. His hand snuck under my shihakusho, making quick work of the ties until I was bare to his gaze as well as his sinful fingers.

I squirmed under him as I tried to get closer; I wanted to feel him against me, inside me. I was throbbing with anticipation, heat pooling between my legs, but Ichigo would not to be rushed. His fingers played lightly across my skin, leaving behind a blazing trail of desire that begged to be quenched. I closed my eyes and focused on his touch, callused fingertips running lazy circles on my skin, dipping into my belly-button, grazing the aching tips of my breasts. I moaned and squirmed, but he was relentless and he did not pause until I had thrown my head back and cried out hoarsely, begging him to take me.

XxX-XxX

Short chapter I know. But it lays the ground work for more drama :D Review pls.


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